


Absolute Power

by Stegosaur



Category: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - All Media Types
Genre: Bondage, M/M, Manipulation
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-11
Updated: 2017-06-17
Packaged: 2018-09-23 11:00:48
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 14
Words: 43,896
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9653108
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Stegosaur/pseuds/Stegosaur
Summary: With Splinter out of the house and their teenage years behind them, Leonardo and his brothers have matured into fine young men.  That is, until Leonardo's repressed fantasies bubble forth and cause him to re-evaluate who he really is, beneath his identity as leader.





	1. Repression

                Splinter had always warned him that, as a leader, 'Absolute power corrupts absolutely.' He had obviously meant it to temper restraint and cooperation with his brothers in their missions and outings, to discourage the Dictator and encourage the General within him. They were a band of brothers, not the brainwashed soldiers of a maniacal emperor. The phrase echoed in his mind before every mission, during every recovery, throughout every meditation, etching it into the forefront of his consciousness before he issued any order in the field. He had been determined to live by it, for the benefit of his family, and it had worked. As they all aged out of their teenage years, emotions and personalities became solid, predictable, and healthy.

                Raphael was still the hothead he'd always been at home, but in the field, he'd become an empathetic Lieutenant, always taking stock of their human impact and focusing on their collective health, his tactical mind honed through a canvas of scars on his body. While Leo was cool and calculated, Raphael would deviate from orders just enough to provide a better overall outcome, once he'd calculated the risks to himself and others around him. It was a trait Leonardo admired, though it didn't stop him from playfully pummeling Michelangelo over pranks and jokes. Donatello had slipped more and more into his natural role of technician, rarely setting out without his vest and belts of equipment and accessories, a walking ambulance, forensics expert, and computer hacker all rolled into one tall, slender terrapin. His constant sleepless nights of his teenage years had given way to a rigorous schedule, his sleeping hours a sacred rite none of them would dare interrupt, even Michelangelo, lest they disrupt his delicate work-life balance.

                If Leo was calm, Raphael empathy, and Donatello intellect, then Michelangelo was still the joy and optimism that glued them together in their darkest of times. His playful nature had never diminished, though he had become infinitely more responsible with age. He cooked, he cleaned, he sparred, he painted, he wrote, he organized their life at home to make sure everyone interacted together as well as had plenty of private time to themselves, the oil of the machine that was their family. In fact, it was only because of Michelangelo's leadership at home that Splinter felt comfortable departing for Northampton full-time, leaving his sons to blossom into independent young men. The change left everyone disoriented at first, but their cohesive family unit quickly rebounded to normalcy within a few weeks, with everyone seemingly adapting to the next stage of their lives.

                Except for Leonardo, that is. As he sat in the dojo and meditated yet again, he could feel the heat rising in his chest and tickling at his heart, his mantra drumming endlessly in his skull as he forced the creeping warmth back into his belly and embraced his calm tranquility. The feelings had become more pronounced since their Father had departed the lair and free time became more available to them all, a plethora of scents filling the showers and rooms that were simultaneously alien and yet intimately familiar, each time stoking the fire burning deep within him. He took to increased meditation to combat these primal feelings, and it worked for a year or two, but his willpower over them had been gradually worn down from the constant, unending battle between the desires of the body, and those of the soul. He let out a begrudging sigh and opened his eyes, ending the meditation session prematurely for a change. The scent of cooking wafted from the kitchen through the paper doors of the spacious dojo, delicately prepared chicken and its accompanying spices filling his nostrils with their bright aroma and inciting peace of a sort. The door rolled in its trough as he opened and closed it, the bustle of the lair echoing in his ears. Raphael was spread out on the couch with a beer in one hand, the other dialing down the volume of the television. "Oh, I'm sorry man. I didn't mean to disturb you." Leonardo smiled and dismissed the apology with a wave of his hand, walking past the sofa.

                "It's fine, I didn't hear a thing over my own disquiet today." Raphael frowned a little, Leonardo waving dismissively again to quell his curiosity. "I'm fine, just a bit off today is all. Would you mind if I cancelled tonight's patrol?" Raphael gave an understanding nod before turning back to the television, Michelangelo peeking from the kitchen with an eager grin on his face. Their little brother always had ears so sensitive that even Splinter couldn't compare, a trait that was equally loved and loathed by them all, depending on the circumstances. "Yes, Mike, you heard right. I'm canceling our run tonight." Michelangelo pumped a fist and let out a 'Woo' in response, hastily returning to cooking dinner lest it burn on the stove. Leonardo couldn't help but chuckle at how quickly he turned on a dime like that as he strode towards Donatello's laboratory, his original bedroom space converted long ago when they finally finished exhuming the upstairs and remodeling it. Donatello had reasoned the change as being beneficial to his balance as well as health, since he could finally have a space to work with his frequently corrosive chemicals without risking damage to himself by sleeping nearby. A few taps of his knuckles against the steel rang out like a gong, his glance checking for a green light above before opening the door. "Don?"

                "In here! Was just reading the news, no experiments today." Their olive-skinned brother sat down the latest copy of the New York Times and removed his reading glasses, the noisy newspaper somewhat of a quirk in Don's matured personality given his propensity for technology. "Should I start getting ready for tonight?"

                "About that, I'm not really feeling up to it today. Rain check?" Leo's nostrils flared at that scent permeating Donatello's lab, that warmth rising in his chest again and making him fidgety. Donatello's eagle eyes picked up on this immediately, his brother scooting across the floor in his wheelie chair and looking up at him with a curious frown.

                "What's on your mind? You've been nervous a lot lately, over responsive to stimuli. Got a cold? Or perhaps a question?" Leo's heart raced as Donatello surgically probed his defenses, watching his brother's nostrils flare as well now that he was in such close proximity. It was one of the few times Leonardo regretted not wearing clothes like everyone else had taken to in various degrees, even if it were just a pair of boxers around the house, like Mikey. It left him feeling exposed and vulnerable as Donatello took full stock of him, as if he were made of glass. "Leo?"

                He blinked out of his daze, forcing that reassuring smile of his. "I'm fine. I just couldn't meditate earlier, and if I can't even relax properly, then I definitely don't want to venture a patrol, you know?" Donatello nodded and scooted backwards a bit, giving them space.

                "You can always talk to me, you know. Unlike Dad, I try to be a little more objective about things, rather than spiritual. Both have their uses and benefits, after all." Leo nodded again and turned to leave, Donatello spinning back in his chair to pick up the newspaper. He froze at the door and contemplated turning back for a moment, to get it off his chest and seek some advice, but ultimately decided against it. Donatello could only partly advise on what troubled him, and even then, he likely couldn't quell the conflict within him about the darkness that had accompanied that warmth for so long.

                Raphael, however, absolutely could. He left Don's lab alone and made his way back toward the sofa, taking a careful seat next to Raphael, his bare skin brushing against Raph's gym shorts, the soft fabric tickling his hide. Raphael gave a nod while in mid-swig of his beer, the evening news scrolling by on the TV. "It's almost like ya gotta drink to tolerate da news nowadays, you know?"

                Leo hummed. "Yeah. Not a lot of good news out there at the moment." Raphael grunted in agreement before tipping his beer toward Leo as an offer. Leonardo carefully gripped its neck and downed a swallow of the dry brew, handing it back to Raphael with an approving smile. "Not bad." Raphael practically grinned at the compliment, beer not exactly Leo's drink of choice. "Hey, Raph?" His brother turned toward him with a look of curious acknowledgement, Leo taking the cue to continue. "How did you handle your control issues?"

                "What do you mean?" Raphael leaned forward and sat the beer down on the table, Leo's fists clenching and releasing against the tops of his thighs.

                "Well, you seemed to want to control everything growing up, including us. You wanted to be the leader, and keep Mikey under control, and Donnie safe...but now you're this really well-adjusted, sweet, compassionate guy." Raphael raised an eyeridge at the backhanded compliment, laughing a little and making Leonardo blush. "I mean...you've always been a great guy, but you used to be this really, really controlling hot head. How'd you conquer that?"

                Raphael shrugged at the question, staring forward at the TV. "I dunno. Guess I grew up. Found constructive outlets for my anger." He turned to Leo as a commercial started playing. "Why?"

                "I...I've had this...feeling." Raphael nodded and folded his arms, leaning back against the plush fabric of the couch. "Like, I want to just...I want everything to be just so. But with...people." Raphael nodded again, deep thought on his face. "And I know I shouldn't, like, at all, but...it's frustrating. Not angry-frustrating, but...emotionally?" Leonardo's voice crept up in tone at the end with a heavy inflection, Raphael seizing on it.

                "Yeah? Well, what emotionally frustrates you about...Mikey?" Raphael looked to the kitchen before finishing that sentence, their little brother having popped in some earbuds to listen to music while he cooked. "His juvenile demeanor? His jubilant attitude? His incessant optimism?" Leonardo shook his head firmly and gave it some more thought, anxious about how to phrase his answer.

                "It's not that kind of emotion. It's...never mind." Raphael shrugged and reached for the television remote, having long since learned to not pry or push Leo, and instead just let his thoughts form independently. Or so he thought.

                "Ohhhh. Oh-hoh." Raphael chuckled knowingly and flopped backwards, cocking a wry grin at Leonardo. "I get it. I was wondering when you'd join us on Planet Earth." Leonardo felt blush streak across his cheeks hotly, that familiar scent suddenly clubbing his nostrils again.

                "W-what do you mean? I didn't say anything!" Leo stammered, Raphael continuing his selfish chortling for a bit before standing up from the couch with a grunt, placing one of his hands atop Leo's head and stepping between his legs, those gym shorts dangerously close to his face. "R-Raph?" His nostrils drank in the scent, Raphael confirming his suspicions before releasing his elder brother and stepping back, bending down at his waist to whisper in Leonardo's ear canal.

                "You smell our sex, Leo. I can see it in your eyes and nostrils." Leonardo froze and gripped his thighs tightly, the skin discoloring around his fingers. "I won't pry, or share, but take my advice: the sooner you open up, the happier you'll be." Raphael bent upright and walked away as Leonardo's heart raced, blood audibly pumping in his head as his denied feelings of arousal bubbled up from below once more, that dark warmth twisting around his chest. Raphael was not wrong, sex had been on his mind for a while now, but what Raphael didn't know is the deep, dark, perverted kind of intimacy he had in mind.

                Because absolute power corrupted him, absolutely.

* * *

 

                It had happened one night when they were out on patrol, having split off from each other to cover more ground and catch up to some fleeing Foot soldiers, a mop up operation of the Shredder's remaining forces in New York. Leonardo and Raphael had celebrated their eighteenth birthdays earlier that week, toasting to adulthood with cups of warm sake - under the supervision of Splinter, of course, with Don and Mike looking on from their sodas with thinly veiled jealousy - and were now enjoying the prime of their lives with some good old fashioned vigilantism. Raphael had split off first with a grin, chasing after a clumsy thug off to the South, while Michelangelo and Donatello took Leonardo's orders to swing North and get ahead of the gang in a pincer attempt. He took down two soldiers on his own, katana slicing their Achilles and leaving them crippled for him to bind them up and deposit them in an alleyway for the police. By the time he had caught up with Team B, Don and Mike were sharing a bottle of water while sitting atop three other soldiers, Don's bola sets keeping them nice and restrained while they caught their breath. "Where's Raph?" Michelangelo asked while Donatello gulped the remaining contents of the bottle down, Leonardo rolling his eyes.

                "I'll get him. We didn't get a distress call, so I'm sure he's fine." Leonardo had long since grown to trust Donatello's technology and inventions, and the reliability of their shell-implanted vital monitors had been repeated life savers. A few taps on his phone and the signal sprung to life, Raph's increased heart rate and oxygen levels indicating he was likely having some fun toying with his prey. Confident that Team B would find their way home, he set off along the rooftops towards their rowdy brother in red.

                What happened next planted the seeds of darkness in his soul, and redefined his entire being for years to come. The soldier Raphael was chasing was no longer alone, and instead had his brother bound and gagged behind a dumpster, his jaw parted forcibly with a series of bungie cords stretched behind his head, their hooks digging into his cheeks. The solider was accompanied by two larger human men, one of which was coiling up a heavy chain around his arms. Leonardo had stopped out of sight to listen in, a strange smell tickling lightly on the air. "So, where's the rest of the gang?" The male wrapping the chain spoke up, clearly questioning the soldier from earlier who gave a shrug in response.

                "Fuck if I know, probably halfway to Riker's courtesy of those muties. I was done with that Foot shit anyway." The three chuckled at that, the third male sauntering over to Raphael and probing his brother's mouth with his fingers, swirling them around. His brother grunted and gurgled, straining in his bonds. "Can't believe you snatched him mid-jump like that. Could've killed him, man!"

                "So? We still would've got what you promised." The human finished wrapping the chain around his thick arm, slipping a hook into place to secure it before moving over to Raphael's body, grinning down at his brother. "Bet this isn't what he had in mind when he agreed to a little fun, eh?" Leo continued to listen in and wait for an opening, all while the men poked and prodded his brother in sexual ways, drool falling from Raphael's lip with a groan. It was only as the third human removed his fingers that he could see Raphael's erection presenting from his slit, a sight that made Leo shudder. Was Raphael enjoying this? "How long we got, anyway? What are the rules?"

                "Ten minutes, tops, so if you wanna nut in his mouth you better unzip." The solider kept watch at the front of the alley nervously, glancing over his shoulder. "Just the mouth, though. His nosy family will know if you touch his ass." Leo's heart raced as the male with the chains unzipped his pants, Raphael groaning lustfully as that human cock was shoved roughly into his mouth. The human hissed with delight as he began thrusting into Raphael's stretched jaw, the third of the group unzipping his jeans and letting his own cock hang out into the open air, pressing it against Raphael's cheek.

                "I think the mutie slut can take two at once." The men chortled as the third shoved in, Raphael gagging briefly before adjusting to the meat filling his maw. Leo wanted to stop this, to intervene, but Raphael was enjoying himself in all of this. As his hand reached down to idly stroke his own slit, his mind began idolizing those perverted thoughts, of his brother bound and gagged, helpless to his whims, his desires. It was a carnal lust he'd suppressed as leader for so long, the desire to do thoroughly control his brothers, and yet there was Raph willingly submitting to it all. Idle rubbing turned into sensual stroking as the men fucked Raphael's face, Leonardo tending to his animal instincts and spectating in silence.

                He didn't keep track of how much time passed, events blurring even in his vivid memory of the evening. He remembered that the two men came first in Raphael's mouth, then Leo climaxed on the rooftop, hot seed spurting from his otherwise celebrate cock. The men untied his brother after zipping back up, the Raphael's erection tucking away as he roughed them up for effect, letting them get a few good punches in for good measure. The soldier dashed out of there when the mock-fighting began, Leonardo making his appearance known with a silent landing behind one of the men, a simple chop to his neck knocking him out cold before Raphael's eyes. If his brother knew Leo saw anything, he never let on, instead flashing that cocky grin of his. "What, won't let me handle my own mess? I had them, Leo, don't sweat it." Leonardo stared back at those white teeth, picturing the human spunk sliding over Raphael's teeth and gums, those bungie cords tugging at his skin. "Earth to Fearless!"

                "Sorry. Hey, Mike and Donnie are already heading home. Did you wanna keep going, or...?" Raphael shook his head and began climbing the emergency stairs, Leonardo close behind.

                "Nah, I'm worn out. Lead the way boss, I'm eager for a good shower and some cold soda!" Leonardo dutifully took the lead as requested and led them back home, his lead position easily letting him hide his confusion and voyeuristic feelings over the night's events. His perception of normalcy had been shattered, the raw feeling of lust igniting a fire in his loins. What he saw tonight disgusted him on multiple levels, but one thought kept coming back to him if he let his mind wander for even a second: the only man Raphael should ever serve, is him.

* * *

 

                Dinner that night was the traditional family affair, jokes and banter traded across the dinner table after a toast of beer to their continued good fortune. Raphael kept his word about their talk earlier, though the scent of beautifully seasoned chicken was tainted by that of lust, which in turn made Leo agitated. Even so, he didn't show it at the table, instead focusing on his usual forte of politics to the chagrin of his brothers. "I can't believe they censured her like that. The female Senator can't read the same letter her male colleagues can? Could they be more blatant?" Raphael groaned while Mikey interjected, defusing the situation with a blatantly-obvious grab for Leo's chicken breast, his knife plunging between Mikey's fingers. "You touch that chicken and you'll end up a two fingered turtle instead of three." The table laughed as Mikey mock-pouted, retreating with his silverware back to the territory of his empty plate. The conversation swirled on cheerier topics: upcoming television shows, sparring ideas, Don's latest inventions, lair security and maintenance, the usual. By the time their plates were empty and their second beers consumed, everyone but Michelangelo was splitting up for evening routines. Don and Raph had already laid claim to the television, working together on the same video game they had been poking at for months now, some endlessly repetitive shooting game they both seemed to enjoy. Michelangelo took to the dishes, leaving Leonardo to find his own agenda for the night, a thought that didn't sit quite well with him.

                "Hey Leo, wanna help me do the dishes real quick?" Michelangelo had a gift for sensing discord at close range, and had likely deliberately pranked him at the dinner table to test his mood, now that he thought about it. He gave a shrug and grabbed his pair of blue rubber dish gloves, suiting up before grabbing the extra sponge and scrubbing away. "So, wanna talk about it bro?" Leonardo didn't look up from the dish he was scrubbing, and neither did Michelangelo, the question purely an invite to mutual discourse if Leo wanted it.

                "About what?" Leonardo wasn't lying, but he did want to know what their baby brother knew. Given that Raphael picked up on him so damn quick, and even Donatello was questioning him, it seemed likely that Michelangelo was equally aware of his current intimacy status as well. He could see Mikey's lips curl in a grin out of his periphery, that Cheshire Cat smirk making his skin crawl.

                "Dude, you smell like a brothel, have been for months. You're either pent up as all holy hell, or you're freakier than Raph." Leo raised on eyeridge at the end of that statement, Michelangelo covering it up with an idle hum prior to interjecting again. "Ah, definitely pent up then."

                "H-how? I mean, I'm not, well, I am, but that's not..." Leonardo tripped over his tongue repeatedly as he tried to cover himself or excuse his behavior, his baby brother still scrubbing diligently away. His voice fell to a hushed whisper as he leaned closer to Michelangelo, making a grab for the dish soap in the process to clean the skillet. "Okay, two questions: first, how did you know I was pent up, and second, what do you mean by, 'freakier than Raph'?!"

                "Like I said, you smell like a cheap brothel. We're turtles, Leo. Did Don not teach you about sex?" Leo's cheeks flushed a deep red at that. Come to think of it, he avoided Don's talk about sex and its details growing up, figuring he'd never need to know about it anyway since he and his brothers were the only ones of their kind. Apparently Mikey and Raph didn't let that stop them from...whatever they were doing. "Okay, look. When we're in heat, or aroused, or sexually needy, our body gives off pheromones. Think of them like a signal fire for your nose: you smell pheromones, and your body reacts accordingly. Likewise, if you're a randy sort of terrapin and want action, your body produces some to give off and attract partners." Leonardo stood there, dumbstruck, as his youngest sibling bluntly explained sex to him like Donatello no doubt did to Michelangelo and Raphael back when they were teenagers. "Dude, I'm kind of surprised you didn't ask about this sooner. I mean, we all thought you were ace, but-"

                "Ace?" Leo interjected, curiosity piqued at the foreign term.

                "Asexual. You know, someone who isn't interested in sex. Man, you really should've gone to Donnie's lectures, he covered the spectrum of this stuff." Leonardo's head spun as terms and definitions were rattled off at him, a gentle nudge from Michelangelo jerking him back into focus. "Anyway, as for part two of your question, that's something you'll have to ask him about. What we do, doesn't leave the bedroom. Mainly to respect you, dude. Figured if you're not into it, why drag it out around you?" Leonardo's eyes fluttered in surprise. Did Mikey just say 'we'? As in, he and Raph? Together? "Just explore at your own pace, dude. You're a grown man, and we're a unique set of four mutant turtles. Surprise, we don't exactly follow societal norms on this stuff. Bright side is that the list of taboos is pretty damn small." Leonardo gave a nod before placing his pan on the drying rack, Michelangelo reaching over to pat his shell. "Anyway, I relieve you of your duty, oh holy dishwasher. Go forth, and explore this new you. Donnie's got lube if you need it." Leonardo rolled his eyes again as he stripped out of the rubber gloves, his cheeks hot with embarrassment at the frank discourse he just shared with the 'baby' of the family, utterly schooled in fundamental sex ed by their youngest brother. With Raph and Donnie still firing away at their game, Leo stalked off to his room and closed his door, breathing a sigh of relief at the solitude.

                He mentally recapped the day's events. Raphael picked up on the fact he could smell their pheremones, but would keep quiet about it. Mikey picked up on his own pheremones, which apparently were pretty damn strong, and Donatello is definitely aware something is up with him. Then there's the implication that Raph and Mikey are lovers of a sort, though that could just as easily be teasing at his expense, devised to provoke a reaction from him. Either way, it didn't matter much now. What did matter was that everyone has apparently been laid but him, and at the very least were indulging in their sexuality openly with each other, so long as he wasn't around to spoil the fun. That felt freeing in its own way, and for the first time since that night on the roof, he let his erection drop from his genital slit, lungs sucking in a sharp breath as cool air tickled his hot flesh. He slowly laid down on his cot and got comfortable, legs spread apart to the edges of the bed as he slowly grasped his length with his right hand, hissing a bit at the sensitivity of it all. He gave it a slow pump to get blood flowing and stoke the flames of arousal, letting that black warmth burn inside of his chest as his mind wandered back to that night once more.

                This time, there were no humans. Raphael's amber eyes wore shock and surprise as he strode up to him, the bungee cord hooks digging into the flesh of his cheeks. Leo pictured his brother struggling in his chains as he let his erection drop free, his right hand rubbing it around the periphery of Raphael's open jaws like a lipstick tube. "Does my little brother want this? Hm?" Raphael groaned and gave another struggle, the chains rattling against themselves and the dumpster his brother was secured to, Leo's left hand gripping Raphael's head. "Shh, quiet now. I'd hate to have to leave you here like this just because someone came to investigate that noise." Raphael tensed up at the threat, eyes wrenching shut as Leonardo slowly inserted his length into Raph's agape mouth. "There we go. That's my good oshiego." He used the term degradingly, tears welling up in Raphael's eyes as Leonardo began to thrust against the back of his throat, Raphael's gag reflex suppressed against the invader. His heart throbbed in his chest as he violated Raphael like that, the sensitive flesh of his cock scraping against the moist throat and tongue of his brother, who sat there and wept in his feverish nightmare of domination. "This is what we were meant for, Raphael. You were always meant to serve me, and I was destined to lead you."

                Leonardo bit his lip as orgasm gushed forward, thick ropes of sperm spurting from the tip of his cock and up his plastron, the excess coating his thick fingers. He'd not orgasmed in years, having taken a vow of celibacy long ago, its only disruption having been that night on the roof. To feel his body dump such a pent up climax was a bliss unparalleled to him, one he knew all too well would enslave him if he weren't careful. Even so, basking in the afterglow provided a measure of warmth and satisfaction, a reassuring embrace that he was fine, that things would be alright if he just opened up a little. He let his imagination flutter back to the last moments of his fantasy, a tinge of horror nipping at his soul as he realized he had fantasized raping his brother, one of the unforgivable sins. As he struggled to recognize and embrace that horror, to tell himself he would never do that, the black warmth grasping his heart spoke otherwise.

                "He did want it that night. I mean, he could have consented before...right? Yeah. Yeah, he'd consent if I proposed that." Leonardo reassured himself of his confident position in the family, a smile creeping over his face as he lay on the bed, semen drying against his skin and shell. "Yeah. He'd do anything I asked." The tendrils of sleep seized him and slowly dragged him into a dreamless slumber, an unusual end to an unusual day.


	2. Advice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With a long weekend ahead of them, Leonardo starts asking his brothers for advice, even as an increasingly dark shadow stirs his soul.

     Just like the human world above, their family had their weekends off from the rigors of patrol and scavenging, a few days of respite from their struggle for existence and justice alike. Despite being a Tuesday above ground, the four of them had settled into their Friday routine beneath the surface, the first day of a long weekend. Michelangelo was preparing to paint in his studio, while Raphael and Donatello were getting their respective workouts in before starting the day. Leonardo had peeked in on them both on his way to the shower, Don's lean form keeping a brisk pace on the treadmill, his sneakers squeaking on the surface while his purple gym shorts fluttered around his thighs, his white tank top soaked with sweat. Raphael was shirtless by comparison, his black gym shorts equally soaked as he did bench presses for strength training, no shoes to be seen. Leonardo could smell the faint whiff of sex in the air, though the stink of sweat easily overpowered anything else. He made his way to the shower and rinsed himself clean of the dried seed plastered across his chest and stomach, a pinch of soap mixed into a fine lather and spread across his skin and front, fingers digging under the shell into the nooks and crannies there. Scrubbing his shell was out of the question without help, but he wasn't really in the mood to have his brothers near his naked form at the moment, given his randy stench. Toweling dry and ready to greet the day, he nearly bumped into Michelangelo just outside the shower room.

     "Dude! Can I ask you a big favor?" Mikey's eyes beamed with excitement, that puppy dog expression their common weakness. Leo gave a quizzical shrug as Michelangelo traced the floor with his foot, milking his innocently bashful personality for all it's worth. Whatever he wanted was definitely important to him. "Can I paint you today?"  Leonardo blinked, raising an eye ridge.    

     "I literally just showered Mikey, and you know what Don said about your paints and our shells..." Michelangelo waved his hands in a frantically dismissive manner, grinning with pride.   

     "No! I mean, I want you to pose for me while I paint. You know, on a canvas?" Leonardo felt unease at the request given his recent tonal shift, but acquiesced to his bubbly sibling. "Sweet! How about during your meditation?"    

     "Why then?" Leo hung his damp towel up to dry back in the bathroom before following Mikey to the dojo, the easel and supplies already setup, the atmosphere set with lit candles and dim lights, a series of black cloth shielding the room from the white lights illuminating the canvas and painting area. Leonardo was admittedly impressed at the effort Michelangelo had put into the scene, the smaller turtle bouncing over to the stand and donning his art frock, a cornucopia of paint splashes screaming for attention.  

     "Because you'll be super still, duh. You can hold meditation for hours, dude, and that's perfect for me to work on my anatomy." Leonardo smiled as he took his seat on the tatami mats, folding his legs and straightening his posture.  

     "Do I need to do anything special?" He asked, Michelangelo holding up a paintbrush with a splash of green paint on it, comparing the shade to Leonardo's skin.    

     "Nah. Just stay still. I need about, like, half an hour? Is that okay?" Leonardo chuckled and nodded, the faint scraping of bristles on the canvas interchanging with soft taps against the rim of a water bucket as Michelangelo immediately set to work. Leo cleared his mind as he set out to find his inner peace, his surroundings fading to black nothingness as he emptied all thoughts and sensations from his consciousness. He opened his mind's eye once he had fully embraced tranquility, the endless forest of his soul before him, its landscape a rich tapestry of color. Here, he was alone, able to meditate on his existence, his purpose, even his training, all without disruption. His brothers were good at clearing their minds in routine meditation, but only he had reached this plateau of skill, this insight into his self. 

     The only sound of his soul was that of the land itself, of wind rustling the leaves of trees, of water burbling along the banks of its stream. His swords, his bandages, his clothes, none followed him here, and none had meaning or purpose to him in this place. A land of such peace had no need for weapons or modesty, after all.  He sat at the edge of his reflecting pool, its waters so clear and still that he could see down to the infinite black of its bottom...the black? No, it was always a rich, muddy brown, scraps of algae nourished by the light above. Yet here it was, a pitch black he could not see through, a hole he could not fill. He could feel his heart begin to race, pulling him from this place, a feeling he focused on quieting so he could continue to explore. He was alone, he had time, he- 

     "Hello." The voice that spoke was his, but was not his own. He glanced around for its source, a shadowy figure standing across from him, on the other side of the pond. He did not yell, yet he was clear.

     "Who are you?" Leonardo asked, the figure remaining silent. It was a foolish question, he realized, as it could only ever be himself. "What are you?" The question was more defined, and so too was the figure, Leo's green skin coming into view.    

     "I'm what you've suppressed." Leo could feel his heart begin to throb again, the landscape crumbling into darkness around him as he was slowly pulled back, the figure fading away.

     "What have I suppressed?!" Leonardo shouted as he was yanked upward into the light of the physical plane, the darkened figure flashing a toothy grin.    

     "Desire." 

     Leo's eyes jolted open as he gasped for air, his heart racing in his chest while cold sweat stung his skin. Michelangelo was none the wiser, still dutifully painting in his corner. A quick glance showed the candles were slowly extinguishing from exhaustion, puddles of wax beneath them from what must have been hours of burning.  "Damn, he's a better model than I thought!" He heard Mikey whisper, the strokes of the brush less frequent and broad, more nuanced and precise.

     "Hey." Leonardo murmured quietly, Michelangelo jumping in fright. "How's it coming?" His little brother peeked out from the shades and grinned at him, giving a thumbs up with pride. 

     "I've been done for an hour or two now, just fixing some details. I'm still amazed you can meditate that well, dude." Leonardo stood up with a grunt, his legs wobbly and sticky from sweat, even as the room was no hotter than normal. He tried to sneak a peek at the painting but was stopped by Michelangelo, who stood in front of it. "No peeking until tomorrow! It's gotta dry first." He smiled and nodded, squeezing his baby brother's shoulder before excusing himself from the dojo, eyes immediately darting to the clock. Six hours had passed, as had breakfast and lunch for him. Raphael was nowhere to be seen, but Donatello was sprawled out on the sofa with a controller in hand, the sounds of an overly-excited announcer cluing him into Donnie's Killer Instinct practice.  

     "I see you've decided to have some actual fun, finally. How was posing for Mikey?" Don never glanced up from his game, thumbs flying over the gamepad with noisy clicks and clacks. Leo's lips pressed into a thin line as he contemplated the disrespect shown...no, there was no disrespect there. Donatello, like everyone else, had the day off. If he wanted to spend it crashing in front of the TV in some pajama pants and tank top, that was his call.

     "Not bad. I actually meditated at his request. I got to relax, he got to paint...it was a win-win, you could say." Donatello gave a short nod before sighing in defeat, Leonardo jumping on the gap between matches. "How was your workout?" 

     "Went well. Running is my meditation, you could say. Shame I can't head topside and run the park." Donatello sighed wistfully at the fantasy while Leonardo gave a good, long examination of his slender brother on the sofa, licking his lips at the thought of seeing him splayed out on the bed, naked, his to explore and control as he saw fit. He shook his head hard to dispel the lustful daydream from his mind, fingers pinching at the bridge between his eyes. "Headache?"   

     "Something like that, yeah." Leo skulked off to the medicine cabinet in the kitchen and downed an aspirin, Donatello falling right back into his game. With Raphael missing and Team B busy, he was left to his own devices to try and keep himself occupied and distracted, a task that felt impossible given his current mental state. "Perhaps I should meditate some more. Try and clear my head." 

     "That's the absolute last thing you should do. You can't force calm like that, Leo, and you know that better than any of us." Donatello had snuck up behind him, a pair of beers between his fingers. "You took aspirin, right? Not Tylenol or ibuprofen?" Leonardo nodded as Donatello snapped the caps off with his calloused thumb, handing one to him. "Then drink some liquor and come play a video game with me. I want to build something in Minecraft anyway." He smiled at Donatello's offer and took a swig of the brew, a churr slipping bast his lips as the cool beverage soothed his body. Leo sat upright on the sofa while Donatello sprawled back out again, his feet crossed over Leo's lap, the fuzzy pajamas scratching at his skin.  Don fired up the game after Leo signed in, the two setting off in different directions and resuming their build, a welcome and pleasant distraction.  "Hey, Leo?"  He hmmed in response, punching at a tree for more wood.  "How come you refuse to wear clothes?"  Leo paused after collecting the rest of the wood from the tree, letting the leaves despawn into seeds as he thought about his reasoning.  Truth be told, he didn't necessarily mind clothing, it's just he never saw much of a need for modesty among his family.

     "Well, refuse is a strong word..."  Donatello flipped his legs around and grunted as he adjusted himself, whacking a spider with his sword.  "I guess I don't see a need for modesty at home.  Not like we haven't seen each other, y'know?"  Donatello gave a nod, chewing on his lip as he struggled with a sudden nest of spiders in a mineshaft, Leo too far away to be of any help.  "Why do you wear them?"

     "They feel nice. They let me express myself." Leonardo was preoccupied picking up seeds and fruits from the trees to see his brother's struggling, Donatello hastily placing a torch atop the spawner to stop it and breathing a sigh of welcome relief. "And I happen to like my modesty. Is that a problem?" Don grinned slyly with his quip, Leonardo adjusting his spot on the sofa with a grunt.  

     "What if it was?" He decided to press his luck slightly with the question, the distinct lack of plastic clicking or squishing signaling Don's hesitation at replying, that sly grin gone. "What if I liked us as we were?" Leonardo stopped playing for a moment, feeling Don's toes curl and stretch his muscles against his bare thighs, his intelligent sibling clearly reading into the statement more than he liked, but as much as he expected.  

     "You mean when you were the Leader?" Leonardo nodded as Donnie chewed on his thumb, picking out the phrasing for his response. "Do you feel we haven't been respecting your authority, Leo?"

     "Nothing like that!" Leonardo jumped at the accusation. "We've not had a serious injury in, well, you know." He bit his tongue rather than jinx their good luck, a hint of superstition in them all. "The Foot are all but gone, the Mayor is cracking down on crime, and even the major syndicates are keeping their heads down with the current political climate. We have it easy, and yet you all display the utmost professionalism when we're working. I have no issues there, or I would've brought them up sooner. You know that." Donatello nodded with a soft smile at the stern rebuke, resuming his gameplay and letting his tension melt, as did Leo. The two played in silence for a few moments before Donatello interrupted again.    

     "So you mean at home. I had a feeling that's what was bothering you." It was Leo's turn to abruptly pause at the statement, Donatello jumping his way out of the cave. "Let's face it, we had such a structured childhood that a military academy would blush, and you were our de facto leader throughout. Yeah, we all reported to Splinter at the end of the day, but you were the one checking on our projects, our time schedules, our hobbies. You micromanaged our lives both in and out of battle." Leonardo began to frown, knowing Don was right on the money. "Not that it's a bad thing. I think we all turned out quite well as a result, but it's obvious you miss that degree of authority." The clicks of Donatello's joysticks and buttons continued even as Leo had remained paused in thought. "Thing is, that's not exactly something you can get back. We're adults now, Leo, and we run our own lives. You've gotta respect that." His heart pounded at the demand from Donatello, his fingers tightening around the plastic controller as that comforting darkness crept up inside of him, dangerous thoughts swirling around. "Why don't you find yourself an outlet? All you do is meditate and join us in our pursuits. Don't you have something of your own you could get your fix from? Perhaps trimming banzai trees, or some sort of structured hobby? You clearly need something to fill that need inside of you, and I'm more than willing to help you find it." Leo's lips spread into a devious grin, resuming play.

     "I'll hold you to that, Donnie." Donatello smiled up at him, not seeing the extent of Leonardo's dark smile. Donatello was right, he needed an outlet for these impulsive, controlling desires, a return to normalcy for him with his family under his thumb. That's how they were trained, after all, how they were raised, and he was their leader. He'd neglected his post long enough, and needed to seize his rightful place among them once again. 

     He didn't see Donatello's warm smile fade into a concerned frown, the scent of pheromones pouring from Leo like a font of lust. Perhaps, Donatello mused, he should have chosen his words more carefully.    

* * *

 

     By the time Raphael returned from the garage (as evidenced by his mechanics' jumper covered in oil and grease stains), Michelangelo was firing up dinner for their evening meal: homemade pizza, with all their favorite toppings. Donatello had ducked into the gym for an additional half hour on the treadmill in advance of his cheese-soaked chicken and jalapeÃ±o pizza, and Leo had spent his afternoon playing Minecraft while considering some dark ideas of his own. Raph peered over the upper ledge railing and shouted downstairs, unzipping his outfit. "Hey Leo! C'mere a moment, I need your hand wit somethin'!" Leonardo paused the game and turned to his obnoxiously loud sibling, faking an annoyed sigh as he stood up from the sofa and followed Raphael to his bedroom. In reality, he welcomed the chance for a little privacy with his hothead brother, knowing that if he could control Raphael, the others would fall in line like dominoes. Raphael stripped out of his jumpsuit in the privacy of his room and tossed it into the hamper, cracking his shoulders and stretching out in full view of Leonardo. "Shut the door, I wanted to talk wit' ya in private." Leo complied and carefully shut the steel door, blocking it with his shell and a grin. "What'cha grinnin' for?"

     "Nothing. What's up?" Raphael bristled a bit, his nostrils catching a whiff of Leo's scent and the heavy lust smothering it. Leo almost certainly picked up a similar smell from him, though far less strong than his own. Raphael sighed and sat down on the bed, his naked body masked by the dim lighting and heavy shadows of his bedroom, Leo's own form cloaked entirely in the shade of the doorway. 

     "About yesterday. I didn't mean to tease you like that, I was just surprised is all." Leo smiled softly and nodded in forgiveness. "I'm glad you're finally figuring things out, bro. I mean, we all thought you were Ace, which is fine and all, but..." 

     Leo raised his hand to interrupt Raphael, lips pressed into a thin line. "About that. Why would you all assume I just didn't like sex? It's not like I've found a human partner or anything, you know, so I've never had it. How could I like or dislike something I never experienced?" Raphael let himself fall back on the bed with a soft thump, his shell mussing the sheets in the process.  

     "It's not that, bro. Ace folks just aren't interested in it at all. It's not a matter of like, or dislike, they just have literally zero interest in it whatsoever." Leo stepped forward into the room and listened intently to Raphael explain their assumptions, letting his brother volunteer information as much as he'd like. "We never smelled ya, is why we thought that. You never seemed to smell us, and we never smelled you. So we just assumed it wasn't your thing. Humans may not pick up well on pheromones and stuff, but Donnie says we hone onto them like lightning rods. That's all." Leonardo wandered around the room, his ninja senses examining every nook and cranny with renewed vigor, searching for evidence of what his family had hidden from him. "Anyway, I wanted to say I'm sorry. It was rude of me to tease ya like that, just when you're figurin' shit out."

     Leonardo smiled at him. "It's alright, though it does mean I have a lot of questions for you." Raphael snapped his fingers into a pistol shape, his universal signal that he was open to questioning or favors. "What is this, and I think I'm quoting correctly here, but what is this 'freaky shit' you and Mikey do?" He emphasized the air quotes for comedic effect, Raphael giving a chortle. "Come on, don't hide from me Raph."   

     "Well I should ask you first, just how much do you know about sex? Do you even know how to coax an erection? How to jerk off properly? Or even how to correctly fuck someone?" Raphael's crass tongue made him bristle in frustration, his brother dodging the question under the guise of inexperience. "No point talking about the main course if you haven't even touched your appetizer yet." Leonardo was about to protest as Raphael rolled up from the bed, until Raph suddenly grasped and squeezed his hands together, his thumbs brushing over the back of Leo's palms. "Don't get upset, bro. I'll be happy to tell ya everything, but there's a time and a place for it. Before I go that far, though, I gotta know you've at least laid a good, solid foundation for it within yourself. Figure out what you are, y'know?"

     Leonardo looked down at their clasped hands, frowning. "I don't, actually." Raphael's warm smile radiated between them, his brother pressing his lips against Leo's cheek. "What was that for?"

     "I figure a good way to start, is ta figure out what ya want." Raphael's cheeks blushed a bit as he squeezed Leo's hands again. "I like guys. Can't say where I stand on women, given that I've never had a chance with one, but...I really like men. I know that much, and am okay with that." Leonardo swallowed hard, a flurry of emotions twisting his stomach and heart into the tightest knots. Part of him wanted to gently kiss his brother on the cheek in return, but another part wanted more, much more. He wanted to force Raph's lips apart with his tongue, conquer his mouth by force and push him back to the bed, to lift his legs and- "Leo?" Everything stopped, Raphael's bashfully sweet smile the only thing in his vision. He couldn't do that to him, not to his best friend, his brother, his family. Here he was, opening himself up to teach Leonardo more about who he is, who they all are, and all he could think about his conquering him like a piece of land, of enslaving him like property. It wasn't right. "Leonardo?"

     "I...I dunno what I like." Leonardo fibbed, Raphael releasing one of his hands to cup the cheek he just kissed, tilting Leo's gaze to meet his amber eyes. "But I know I like you." Raphael's eyes wet with emotion as that smile radiated more heat than the sun itself, Leonardo's heart aflutter as tension melted from his body. Raphael pulled him into an embrace, chest to chest, his grip on Leo's other hand being exchanged for a firm grasp of his shell.

"I like you too." Leonardo fished his hands around Raphael's hips and squeezed there, letting his chin rest atop Raphael's shoulders. The embrace was soft, loving, a stark contrast to the terrors plaguing his mind of late. He felt Raphael's body heat mingle with his own, a pleasantly reassuring warmth, like a wood fire during a snowstorm. Time lost all meaning in that moment shared between them, Leonardo taking note of every sensation. The breath against his skin, Raphael's firm muscles relaxed against his own, the difference in rhythm between their breathing, even the details of his scent, scented soaps of lavender mixing with the brute stink of sweat and engine grease, the strong smell of alcohol washing down the back of his neck with each exhale from his brother. He surely experienced all these before, but in such close proximity, such intimacy between them, they held entirely new meanings.

     Raphael broke the embrace and took a step back, his hands grasping Leo's shoulders. "We should go eat, Michelangelo surely won't take too much longer." Leonardo smiled and nodded in agreement, breaking from Raph's grip and heading to the doorway. "Hey, Leo?"

     "Yeah?" He stopped at the door, fingers gripping its knob loosely, shakily from the rush of endorphins in his system.

     "If you're ready...when you're ready, come talk to me. I wanna help ya, alright? Donnie can be a bit too clinical at times, and while I ain't an expert on this in any right...I just wanna help ya out. Give ya someone to trust exploring this with." Raphael's sweet smile was on the verge of giving Leonardo diabetes, but it didn't matter. He beamed back at Raphael, smiling so wide his teeth showed.

     "Definitely, Raph." He would definitely talk to him, very, very soon.

 


	3. Hobbies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leonardo seeks help from Michelangelo and Donatello, neither of whom are very cooperative in giving him what he wants, but inadvertently give him what he needs.

     "I need pornography." Leo blurted out the request to a dazed Michelangelo, a spit of drool narrowly missing his open comic as his brain went into reset mode.  
  
     "I'm sorry bro, I must need to get my hearing checked. What's up?" Leo's fists clenched in shameful frustration, determined to figure out who he really was after the prior day's events. He didn't trust Don not to pry, and he didn't trust Raphael to be independent or objective, but somehow he trusted Mikey, even if it meant everyone within a five light year distance would know the mighty and fearless Leonardo was asking for porn before lunchtime.  
  
     "I. Need. Porn." Mikey sucked his lips in against his teeth as he stifled a giggle, closing the comic and placing it back in its protective cover. "I'm serious! I need some porn, Mikey. I've got about twelve years of learning to catch up on, and the sooner the better." Michelangelo fished his laptop out from beside the bed and opened the lid, fingers flying across the keyboard as he got to work.

     "So what were you looking for?" Leonardo paused, briefly weighing the risks of blunt honesty with his brother versus taking control of it for himself. He ultimately decided to let Michelangelo take the lead on this one and circled around to see the screen, a blank web browser open. "Dudes, chicks, kinky shit...?"  
  
     "Guys." Leonardo blurted out, Michelangelo's fingers not moving. "Well?"

     "I need more info dude. Photos? Artwork? Videos? Humans? Furries?" Leonardo rubbed the bridge between his eyes, his brother needlessly complicating it for him.

     "You're the driver, Mikey. I want to see porn of some guys, so just show me what you have." Michelangelo gave a sort of blank shrug that made Leo roll his eyes in furstration. "Okay, fine, whatever, show me the last thing you looked at and we'll go from there." Michelangelo sucked his teeth at the order, slowly shaking his head.

     "Yeah...no." Leo was seriously starting to regret asking him for help, seeing as how he couldn't even get a simple nudie picture out of his little brother. "Look, I want to help, but ah...I'm kind of a connoisseur of this stuff, Leo. Unless you can tell me what you want to see, I'm kind of at a loss, sorry." Michelangelo was begrudgingly right, and he knew that going to Don or Raph would've resulted in a vastly different, guided experience. The whole point of asking Mikey was so he could steer the proverbial ship while his brother did the actual searching.

     "Alright then..." Leonardo mused, a deviant idea crossing his mind. "Did you paint any porn of us?" Michelangelo made a few clicks of the mouse, three folders popping up: Raphael, Michelangelo, and Donatello. "Wait, seriously?" Mikey nodded, raising an eyeridge at him curiously.

     "Dude, there's no such thing as Playturtle, and given that we all fool around with each other, it just kinda...happened." Leonardo's mouth was agape, folders of porn featuring his siblings allegedly staring him in the face. "So, if you can be mors specific about what you want..." Michelangelo tried to lead him just a little bit, no doubt itching to see if Leo had made a move with either of the other two yet. Leonardo figured there was no harm in letting Mikey know who was on his mind, since this would all be out in the open as soon as he left the room anyway.

     "Show me Raph's stuff." Michelangelo hesitated somewhat, giving Leo a slightly pleading look of discouragement. "Come on, let me see Raph's stuff." Mikey shrugged and sighed, double-clicking the folder and letting its contents fill the screen. The pictures were all numbered in sequential order and date, and started off rather...plain. Raphael in various states of dress, Raphael in his patrol gear, a few poses labelled 'pinup' with his brother posing sensually, usually stretching out or flexing his heavy muscles. "Wow. You painted all these?" Michelangelo nodded as Leo motioned for him to scroll down, watching the series gradually turn more sexual in nature: Raph with his slit parted, another with his cock out, one where he's stroking off, even one mid-climax. The pictures made his own length twitch under his plastron, that lustful heat building up as he went one by one through each portrait. "Jesus..."

     "He's my best model. Most popular one, too. Folks just don't seem to care for Don or I, strangely enough." Leo's head jerked towards Mikey with a look of shock, his brother immediately failing to backpedal. "I mean, Raph doesn't ask to see our stuff a lot, he tends to, uh..."

     "Mikey..." Leonardo growled, his eyes narrowing at his little brother in anger.

     "Promise you won't be mad?" Leo shook his head, Michelangelo sighing as the gig was up. A few clicks brought him to a website full of similar artistic portraits of animal people of all sexes and poses, Leo's heart racing. "It's for my FA account. There's a lot of humans really into guys like us, but there's not exactly a whole lot of anatomically correct, quality artwork out there. I post a few pics per month, sell some CDs and prints, and make a hundred bucks a month or so." Leo's jaw hung agape as he looked at the website, his gaze stopping on one of what was clearly Donatello, his brother mid-stride during a run in the forest, Mikey's attention to detail phenomenal.

     "Is that...Donnie?" Michelangelo turned back to the laptop and nodded, smiling with pride. "Does he know he's on here? Do any of them know?" Leo paused for a moment, but briefly interrupted before Mikey could respond. "Am I on here?!"

     "NO!" Michelangelo raised his voice, minimizing the page. "Everyone on here knows exactly what's been posted of them, how popular it is, and what kind of cash I've made from prints. It's all consensual, all above board. I mean, as above board as three mutant turtles posing for porn can be, I guess." Leonardo full-on facepalmed as Michelangelo tried to ease his fears. "Look, none of the shit on here is real except for us, and even that's all paintings, not photographs. To everyone on here, I'm just a really gifted artist who knows their anatomy well. They have no idea I'm just painting my brothers or my reflection, okay? We're safe, Donnie made sure of it."

     "Oh, so Donnie knew about this?" Leonardo seethed, Michelangelo sighing again in defeat. "I don't believe this, Michelangelo! You put our family in danger to, what, be some internet celebrity?!" Michelangelo shook his head again, tears in his eyes.

     "No, Leo! Like I said, Donnie made sure that none of that can be traced back to us. It's all traditional painting, I scan it in, Don wipes the identifying data, and I upload and tag it. No photos, no names, nothing." Leonardo yanked the laptop away from Michelangelo's grip, making sure to leave the lid open. "Dude, don't break it!"

     "I'm not. I'm taking this to Donnie and making damn well sure you didn't sell us out on accident. Consider yourself grounded, Michelangelo." He snarled, Mikey preparing to protest before sinking back on the bed, meekly acknowledging the order as Leo stomped out. Rather than make a beeline to Donnie's lab, he took a detour to his own room first and shut the door, slamming the lock bar into position for privacy. His heart raced, adrenaline coursing through his veins and making his fingertips shake and quiver. The lie was a spur of the moment act, but he sold it well enough to Mikey that his little brother wouldn't dare step out of line until he apologized later. After all, there's little doubt Michelangelo was telling the truth, and that Donatello and Raphael knew exactly what he was doing with those paintings. While Leo may have disapproved of keeping it a secret, part of him knew that Mikey was doing something to net himself two new games a month, and it was his own fault for not investigating that source of income.

     Satisfied with the privacy of his room, he sat himself down on the edge of his bed and set the laptop down on his thighs, fingers scrolling through the site Mikey had left up. Foxes, wolves, dinosaurs, male and female alike, all in artworks running the gamut from simple portraits to hardcore pornography. His heart fluttered a little at the thought of so many folks finding mutants like him attractive enough to make porn of, but that wasn't his real end goal. He closed the web browser and made a digital beeline back to the folders Mikey showed him, deciding to work his way up to his target slowly by starting with Donatello's folder first. Their taller, leaner brother was clothed in almost all of his pieces, the raunchiest being one of him tastefully holding a towel over himself in one, the following version having the towel removed and his erection on full display, as if he were posing in front of a mirror for a selfie. Everything else was tame pinup material: some outfit experimentation, tasteful nudity with no genitalia exposed, a few back shots of his toned rump for good measure. He noticed that as the pictures went on, he was increasingly bashful, as if he wasn't comfortable being a sexual model for Mikey's art. Speaking of, a quick peek into Mikey's folder was almost entirely salacious pinups of their little brother, almost entirely tasteful nudity in a variety of provocative poses, even some groan-worthy art pieces involving him with popsicles and phallic objects, the innuendo clear as crystal.  
  
     Seeing nothing overtly wrong with his brothers' art roles thus far, Leo finally turned his gaze to Raphael's folder, fingers jogging past the prior pieces Mikey had shared and hastily getting to the good stuff. Raphael was far more of an exhibitionist than Leo was expecting, picture after picture of him in full erection nudity, toys in his mouth or ass, white line dripping from his holes like cum. He looked at times like a porn star, coated in juices and fluids like a filthy man whore as his ass was stretched wide around a large dildo, or a floppy cock was shoved down his throat. One was even a beautiful perspective piece of Raph's amber eyes gazing up at the viewer hungrily, his mouth wrapped around a cock and pressed against what Leo presumed to be Mikey's plastron as he sucked on the length. That shot made Leo's own loins stir, the carnal hunger on Raphael's face making him long to have his brother under that degree of control and ownership. Leonardo let his erection drop free of his genital slit, fingers circling its length as he continued scrolling through the artwork. His breath hitched in his throat as they very quickly introduced actual gear onto him, simple elements at first such as handcuffs around his wrists, or a ball gag wedged between his teeth, its ruby red color shining brighter than the red mask tied around his bicep in that particular shot. The artwork progressed down this rabbit hole of restraint, Leo stroking himself as Raphael was modeled in far more restrictive poses and gear, the final image of the set showing his brother in what the file name said was 'FULL OUTFIT'.  
  
     In that image, Raphael was on his knees, spread wide to expose a shot of his crotch and the thick dildo wedged inside of his ass, his full erection open and engorged with some sort of egg tied beneath its head. A leather collar was wrapped tight around his neck, the skin crumpled beneath it as it bit and pinched at his flesh. Drool cascaded down over his lips from the ring gag secured within, those leather straps buckled behind his head with a silver clasp shown just within perspective, a heavy blindfold wrapped over his eyes, the nickel metal of handcuffs visible behind his shell and keeping Raphael's arms behind him. Leonardo was enraptured with the scene presented, that warming darkness creeping over his chest as he continued masturbating to his brother's predicament and the thoughts of what he'd do to him like that. His leaking pre served as lubricant while he fantasized of thrusting his cock down Raphael's throat with force, his brother jerking and struggling within the bonds against his indomitable will, until tears began streaking down beneath the blindfold. The thought of his foot stroking and fondling Raph's own length as he continued to use and abuse his objectified sibling, slowly teaching him to associate his own pleasure with that of Leo's of accepting his role in the new family. Leonardo bit his lip and moaned through his teeth as climax wracked his body, more spurts of seed splashing over his plastron just like before, the foreign feeling of sexual bliss quickly becoming a norm of intimate joy to him, one he'd denied himself for far too long. Perhaps one that his brothers had denied him, he mused maliciously.  
  
     As the afterglow faded from his orgasm, Leo grabbed some wet wipes from his night stand and bathed his chest free of his spunk, getting as clean as some moist towelettes would allow. A shower would no doubt be needed, but he was confident he nobody would probe too deeply into his 'self-discovery' phase, except perhaps Donatello. He clicked his fingers with a grin, recalling what Don had told him on the sofa the night prior about providing him whatever he needed to find a hobby, or as he put it then, a 'constructive outlet'. The more he dwelled on the idea, his outlet had always been his family, always molding and shaping them into the precision instruments he needed, that they needed to be. This was just another step in that ongoing process, surely, and Don would be needed to help him prepare them for their next transformation, starting with Raphael.

* * *

  
     "Hey Donnie, you got a minute?" Leonardo peeked in from the doorway to the lab, Don covered head to toe in lab safety gear as he measured out a chemical. Having already smoothed things over with Mikey, he now needed to cover his bases by talking about it all with Donnie and getting the narrative straight between the three of them. "It's about Mikey's art." Don finally acknowledged him with a defeated sigh, placing the set down and covering everything with caps or films, sliding the vent hood closed so any fumes wouldn't waft into the general space as they talked.  
  
     "Yeah, I had a feeling our resident artist would rat us out. Come in." Leo took a seat on a spare chair while Donatello removed his custom gloves and safety gear, leaving himself in a pair of Doctor's scrubs and lab coat before sitting in his ample wheelie chair. "To answer your inevitable question, it's all safe. There's no identifying data, I manage the network of PayPal and bank accounts that the funds are channeled through, and the balance is stored in bitcoin on our redundant server farm with an off-site and encrypted-"  
  
     "Don! I get it, geez. You think I have any idea what those things are?" Leonardo raised his hands in surrender, even as Donatello pinched the bridge between his eyes and rubbed there firmly. "I trust your work completely, Don, but I had to make sure we're safe. My bigger question is, why didn't you tell me this up front? Why is everyone hiding this from me?" Leonardo worked to turn the tables back around so that he was the one negotiating and leading this discussion, not Donatello, as he needed more leverage before making his demand. "Don't you trust me at home?"  
  
     Donatello paused in thought, carefully choosing his words to respond. "We do, Leo, but we also knew you would've shot this project down flat. It's a good source of income, and fully consensual for all involved participants. Nobody's privacy is being violated, especially not yours." Leo was clearly not satisfied with that answer as Donnie pulled a plunger under his chair and reclined it fully, crossing his legs. "We're adults now. We control our own lives, and you need to accept that. You cannot control us at home, Leo, we're not soldiers anymore." A simmering rage bubbled in his gut at the blatant disrespect shown to his authority, though he also knew Donatello was right: they don't have any enemies anymore, not really, and so they had settled into the lifestyles of veterans of war, not enlisted men. His authority ended with the war, it only still recognized on patrol because of his skills and capabilities as a leader, not out of obligation. "I know this transition is hard for you especially, but you need to work through it. We're not fighting ninjas and aliens and cyborgs anymore, we're just...normal mutant guys." Leo's fists clenched tight atop his thighs, a signal not missed by Donatello. "Did you try finding a creative outlet, like I asked? A lot of veterans in the military turn to constructive or creative pursuits, to manage their mental traumas as well as to reintegrate into society. Just because we live in a sewer doesn't mean we don't have to reintegrate."  
  
     "I know, Donnie." Leo lied, once again on the defensive thanks to Don's delicate vocabulary. "And I'm working on that, I am, but this sort of thing...I should've known about it." Leonardo looked towards his brother with a disapproving frown, Donatello sighing as he stood up from his chair with a grunt.  
  
     "No, you shouldn't have. It didn't involve you, or concern you. We all deserve privacy, Leo. Even you." Donatello walked over to his workbench and rummaged around, pulling a camera from the bits of scrap and inspecting it briefly. "I think you need some help with that concept. Father never let us have privacy beyond our own rooms, and the concept was kept foreign to us. Now we're adults, and everyone except you has realized that we need some places to keep secrets, to feel normal about ourselves. Some things, we just don't want to share." Satisfied with the device, he handed it to Leo. "I want you to start taking photos of things you don't want us to see. Things that are important to you, that you don't want to share with us. Start building up that sense of privacy we all have." Leonardo frowned at the offering, his original plan shot to pieces by Doctor Donatello. "You're a ninja, Leo. You're still the most practiced of any of us, so feel free to go topside if you want. Just take photos of things that are important to you, that you wouldn't be comfortable sharing with others. Things you want to keep private." Leonardo gave a resigned nod as he stood up, examining the simple digital camera in his hands. It had been stripped to its minimum functionality by its manufacturer, a basic power button on the left, with the shutter release on the right, and a zoom toggle ring around the button itself. Everything about it was automated that could be.  
  
     "Thanks Don, I'll try." Leonardo practically skulked out of Donatello's lab as his brother suited back up to continue experimenting, the snap of rubber gloves echoing as Leonardo closed the door behind him. He fumbled with the camera idly as he wandered to the kitchen for a glass of water, noise from the TV distracting his attention toward the living area. Raphael was sitting on the couch in his gym shorts again, the neck of a beer bottle wedged tightly between his fingers as he took a swig. Leonardo paused and raised the camera to eye level, the screen acting as a viewfinder.  
  
     He took a picture.


	4. Identity

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leo can't duck the truth forever, not from Raphael, and certainly not from himself.

     At his insistence, Donatello had set him up with a basic photo printer in his bedroom to print off his photos, as well as a hard drive to export them off the memory card. While Leo was more than capable of working a computer, he found the simplicity of the setup far more encouraging to his budding voyeurism habit. Donatello had also attempted to give him the 'sex talk' on multiple occasions, a topic Leo constantly dismissed as something he'd figure out on his own, which was entirely true: he'd figured out that the male anatomy was almost certainly the only thing he'd ever get a real crack at, and it helped immensely that he found Raphael so sexually attractive in that regard. He wouldn't go so far as to identify himself as gay or bisexual, or dare get into the gender stuff Mikey had eagerly shown him one day on his FA account, but he could be fairly certain he preferred the physical intimacy of another man as opposed to a female form like April's.  
  
     "Hey man, you got a moment?" Raphael's voice called from his doorway, Leo carefully closing up the printer setup in his trunk and tucking the slim camera in his belt, smiling to greet his handsome brother.  
  
     "Yeah, come on in. What's on your mind?" Raphael closed the door after him and sat on the edge of Leo's bed, his red boxer briefs clinging tightly to his hips and thighs and irritating Leo's less-modest sensibilities.  
  
     "That's what I was gonna ask you, bro. Don says you've been ducking him all week." Leonardo let an annoyed sigh and pinched the bridge between his eyes, rubbing there to soothe his frustration. "I know it's boring, Leo, but we all did it."  
  
     "It's not that it's boring, it's that Don will try and pigeon hole me into a label." Leonardo opted for blunt honesty this time around considering it was Raph he was speaking with, not Don or Mikey. "I don't think I fit a traditional label." Raph eyed him curiously, a soft smile on his face. "What?"  
  
     "Well, what do you know about yourself, then? I won't slap a label on you, I'm genuinely curious." Leonardo felt blush swell in his cheeks as Raphael showed sincere interest in him and his concerns, that compassion and empathy something that never failed to throw Leo for a loop and make him stumble psychologically. "I mean, last time we really talked, you kinda left things vague. Now you sound more certain about yourself, so why don't ya tell me?" Leonardo fidgeted with his fingernails as his mind raced, contemplating just how truthful he should be with Raph. Should he tell him of his fantasies? Or of the dark figure haunting his every meditation? Or just keep things to a minimum?  
  
     "I...I know I like men." Leo stammered out, his gaze dodging Raphael's. "Mikey showed me his, ahem...his stash, I guess, and yeah. That kinda cemented that male turtles are a huge turn on. Surprise." Raphael's smile could be heard in the otherwise silent room, a feeling of judgement tickling at Leo's psyche. "Though that's only because there's no female turtles for me to, y'know, consider."  
  
     "A female mutant turtle?" Raphael mused, stroking his chin with that cliche evil genius look. "We could call her Venus!" Leonardo snorted as he burst out into laughter, Raphael chortling as well.  
  
     "That's beyond cheesy, Raph. That's something you'd see on a cartoon." Leonardo wiped a tear from his eye as Raphael savored the shared laughter, his brother opting to milk the joke by standing up and cupping the upper part of his plastron like they were human breasts.  
  
     "She'd even have tits!" He howled, strutting in a circle like some fashion model on the runway. "I'm Venus, and I'm a female mutant turtle. Mwah!" He even blew Leonardo a kiss for good measure, who was still struggling to keep some semblance of composure despite his snorts and giggles. "What, you don't approve of my sensual womanly curves?"  
  
     "Stop!" Leo cried, waving his hands frantically for Raphael to cease his impersonation. "Jesus God almighty I think I may wet myself if you keep going. Donnie would have a literal aneurism if you tried telling him a female mutant turtle would have breasts." Raphael ceased his teasing and sat back down on the bed, folding his legs over and grabbing his upper ankle. "I thought you came in here to talk about my sexuality?"  
  
     "I did, and I learned you have absolutely no appetite for the female form. Am I right?" Leonardo gave a nod once he calmed down enough, wiping his eyes free of tears. "I also learned you seem to be pretty into guys. What do you like about them, if you don't mind me asking?" Leo's blush returned as he thought about Raphael's powerful muscles pushing his plastron out taut, heavy biceps straining against the emerald skin containing them, his beautifully-sculpted legs undoubtedly capable of crushing bone if he really tried, and then there were those white teeth, practically begging for a metal ring to force them apart, that hot, slick tongue within...

     "Your cock. THEIR cock. I mean..." Raphael didn't laugh at the slip up, instead staring Leo down intently. "I look at guys like us, and it's the musculature, the strength, the curves, everything about a well toned man gets me going." Raph gave a nod, Leo picking at his fingernails bashfully. "Plus, well...I guess I like cocks. I've never given mine much thought before, but recently it's just...I see porn of men, and I know that's what I want." Leo deftly side stepped whether he'd seen Raphael's own photos or not, who appeared none the wiser that Leo had seen the hardcore porn his sibling was featured in.  
  
     "That's fair." Raphael said calmly, picking up on Leo's fidgeting. "So what sort of porn have you been looking at?" Leo's face went pale as he felt Raphael's stare on him, mind racing to think of an excuse or lie even as he desperately wanted to just be honest.  
  
     "Not much. Just some stuff Mikey showed me on the internet and the like." The vague lie went over with Raphael like a wet balloon, his brother obviously catching on to his lie, but refusing to push it further for some reason. "Thing is, though, I'm hesitant to say I'm 'gay' or 'bisexual' until I've had equal experience with women, you know?" He smoothed the lie over with a substantial amount of truth, Raphael opting to run with that lead instead.  
  
     "Makes sense. Anyone you got a crush on?" Raphael flashed his toothy grin at Leo, which in turn made his heart flutter. Yes, he had a crush. Of course he had a crush. His crush was sitting on his bed in a pair of boxers that needed to be ripped from their body before being conquered and ravaged like the beautiful, handsome man he was, placed under Leo's firm, unyielding thumb.  
  
     "I wouldn't know. I mean, I have some inklings..." Raphael's smile faded as Leo elaborated, his once fierce gaze slowly looking downward as Leonardo continued. "...but I'm just not sure yet. This is all new to me, and I don't have experience in relationships like that. How do I know if someone I'm interested in is in a relationship? How do I know if they're into me? Or want to date? Or, uh...you know."  
  
     "What, fuck?" Leo didn't respond at first, Raphael chuckling a little as he unfolded his legs and looked down at the floor. "You just ask, ya idiot. Dat simple." Leo loved the Brooklyn accent that crept out when Raphael was less focused on his words or tone, that sort of relaxed speech pattern that tugged him into Raph's gruff voice. Leonardo stopped picking at his fingernails a bit to look carefully over Raphael, swallowing hard as he mustered up some courage.  
  
     "Uhm...are you in a relationship?" Leonardo's voice was meek and unsure of himself, though it was more than enough to seize Raphael's attention. "Well?"  
  
     "No, not really. Nothing serious or romantic, anyway." Raphael looked quizzically as Leonardo stood up and approached him, those thick fingers hesitantly landing against his cheeks. "Leo?"  
  
     "May I kiss you, Raphael?" Leonardo's voice shook with anxiety as silence stretched between them, the emerald turtle quickly smiling wide and nodding in approval, that skin tugging at the pads of Leo's fingers as it moved. Leonardo carefully parted his lips and leaned down to Raphael's level, gently placing them to his brother's and forming a seal. It was strange to Leo, to be kissing his brother so intimately. They'd swapped pecks on the cheek when they were younger, but the sexual implications of this kiss were far clearer to him and served to excite his own length under the plastron and within its slit, causing him to break the kiss before he got fully erect. Raphael stared back at him with a slightly agape jaw, a goofy smile on his face as Leonardo stood up straight.  
  
     "That was nice." Raphael whispered huskily, their mutual pheromone scents mixing in the open air of the bedroom and creating a feedback loop that Leo struggled to withstand. "Ya enjoy it?" Leonardo nodded again with a hint of blush on his cheeks once more, his throats bulging out as he swallowed hard and took a breath of the lust-tainted air.  
  
     "Yeah." Leonardo smiled nervously while Raphael leaned back on the bed, propped up by his arms. "I, uh..." Leo let his mind wander for a bit, weighing his options on how to proceed. He could kiss him again, or perhaps pin him to the bed. He could likely coax him into sex, knowing his brother's proclivities, or he could just cuddle in bed, exploring Raphael's body over several hours, tracing every muscle and nook and cranny, memorizing the landscape of his form.  
  
     "I should go." Raphael suddenly stood up with a smile, planting a kiss on Leonardo's lips as he was still caught in thought, snapping him into reality. "I'm glad you're figuring things out though, Leo. I really am." Raphael had quietly excused himself before Leonardo could respond, those heavy pheromones quickly dissipating as Raph shut the door behind him, leaving Leonardo alone in his room. He could feel his heart racing in his chest like a car engine, skin cool as his pores had opened to sweat, a whimpering pain from his length still trapped within his slit, crying for attention. Leonardo sat on his bed roughly and leaned forward, holding his head in his hands.  
  
     "I think I love you."

* * *

 

     Leonardo looked around the grove of his soul, nothing seemingly out of place or different other than the shadowed person at the opposite end of the pond. "That's odd, I should be asleep, not meditating." The grass crunched with dew beneath his feet the air warm and reassuring like a warm blanket. The shadowed figure was mimicking his meditation form at the pond's edge, his features having come to increasing definition as he meditated over the past two weeks, ever since they'd met that day in the dojo. Leonardo approached him slowly, hesitant to break the scene or let his mind interfere in the form of a dream or nightmare. "Show yourself."  
  
     The figure did not move from their spot. "You know who I am. If you cannot see me, it is because you deny me." Leonardo swallowed hard and clenched his fists tight against the sides of his thighs. "Violence will not remove me. You know this."  
  
     "You're my desire." Leo confessed, looking to his right. Raphael stood there, frozen in his mind's eye with that handsome smile of his, his only clothing being the classic mask, belt, and pads they wore as teenagers on patrol, though his body was that of the strong young man he embodied today. "My desire for Raph." The figure turned to look, then turned away. "I know you are."  
  
     "You still deny your true feelings." Leo looked to Raphael again, a loud gulp caught in his throat. "That is not what you want."  
  
     "It's wrong." Leonardo protested.  
  
     "The mind is not concerned with right or wrong, nor is the spirit. What is right for you, is inevitably wrong for someone else. You and Shredder both believed you were right, yet you prevailed." The semantics of justice were something he'd never given much thought to, beyond simple enforcement of their honor or laws. Shredder murdered, killed, stole, kidnapped, raped and pillaged. He was a monster. "Yet he believed he was right."  
  
     "Can't have a moment to think in peace, can I?" Leo quipped sarcastically, the figure's smile visible for a change. Of course he couldn't think privately when confronting himself like this. The only reason this figure remained cloaked in darkness is his conscious refusal to accept its existence. "Fine. Let's suspend the rule of law, or morals and ethics, just for a moment." Leonardo jerked toward Raphael, he was now bound on his knees, his arms tied behind his shell, a large ring gag prying his jaws apart while a spreader bar kept his thighs wide, a blindfold tied tight around his head with a red collar locked snug around his neck, Raphael's erection dripping with need. "I want that. That's what has been haunting my every dream, alright?" He turned back to the figure and froze as he stared into his own eyes, though not his own body. His balanced body had been reshaped for strength matching Raphael's own, his upper body swollen with untapped muscle. His plastron was covered with a complex leather harness, a midnight black choker wrapped around his neck while a pair of chaps hung from his hips, combat boots and work gloves covering his appendages. This alternate Leo grinned toothily at him with unbridled lust, cupping his chin with that gloved hand and making Leo focus on his eyes.  
  
     "That's what you want him to be, but not what you want. Not what you truly desire." Leonardo struggled in his doppelganger's grasp, the grip impossibly tight. He closed his eyes to try and dispel his creation, opening them only to see the reflection of a mirror, Raphael posed before it while this darkly strong Leonardo cupped his chin, Leo realizing he was in Raph's point of view, bondage and all. "You want to see him squirm and resist, to fight your control, just like before." Leonardo struggled hard, eyes wrenching shut once again as he tried to wake up, his vision returning only to find his mouth full of the doppelganger's cock, tears streaming down his cheeks as those gloved hands gripped his skull. "To force your will onto him, use him like the toy he craves to be. That's what you want, what we want." Leo snapped his bonds in a moment of mental fortitude, their bodies falling backwards until he had his hands around the doppelganger's throat, struggling to extinguish that dark side of his soul. He felt the breath empty from his lungs and increasingly weak even as his grip tightened, and a gasp for air and long blink resulted in him being the one who was pinned, his doppelganger the one strangling the life from his body. "You can't rid yourself of me, you know that, just as I can't kill you." Leo's vision began to darken and dim as his air dwindled, those fingers wrapped around his neck impossibly, crushingly tight. "He's ours, you just need to accept this is the reality of things." Leo tried to free himself futilely as his body stopped responding, a sickening pulse and wet feeling as his left eye detached from its retina due to pressure, leaving him partially blind. "Take him. This is what you are, what we are. His opinion means nothing, only his obedience."  
  
     Leonardo jolted awake and out of bed with a scream, cold sweat dripping from his body, his bed linens soaked with urine. He sat there and panted for air for a few moments, fingers hastily turning on his bedside lamp and illuminating the room, extinguishing its shadows. It had all been a dream, a nightmare, he wasn't that kind of person. As he swung his legs out of bed to go shower off and begin cleaning up, he felt his right leg bump his previously unaware erection, a sticky trail of semen dangling between its tip and his thigh. He stared at it in shock for a few moments before breaking down in tears, sobbing openly on his bed.


	5. Hallucinations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leonardo's nightmare follows him into the real world.

     Leonardo leaned over the upstairs railing and surveyed the lair on the last day of their extended weekend, everyone in the household going about their days like normal. Michelangelo was cooking up a storm in the kitchen, Donatello was locked tight in his lab, and Raphael was on the sofa once again, the same boxers as yesterday conforming to the curves of his muscles. Leo was exhausted after last night, deftly washing his linens and making his bed before anyone woke up, leaving himself presentable, if tired for the day ahead. "Look at him, so relaxed." Leo ignored the hallucination to his right, his doppelganger leaning backward against the same railing, grinning maliciously. "He should be up here, tending to our needs." Leonardo didn't respond aloud, knowing the slightest noise or action could giveaway his altered state. "You can't win by ignoring me." Leonardo's lip twitched as he suppressed a snarl, the hallucination standing up and circling his arms around Leo's shoulders, whispering into his ears. "Accept me, and I go away. You'll sleep well, you'll adapt...you'll get what you want. Just invite me in." Leonardo stood upright and moved through his ephemeral double, carefully moving downstairs and into the kitchen to grab himself some coffee. His twin was already seated at the table while Mikey rolled some dough for the week's bread, Leonardo fishing out one of Don's coffee mugs and a spoon, before eyeballing the cabinets.  
  
     "Hey Mike? Do we have instant coffee or anything?" Leonardo rummaged through some cabinets idly to prevent himself from having to look at the vision there, Michelangelo pausing to look at him.  
  
     "Shit dude, you look like crap. He has a stash over there, top shelf." Mikey thumbed towards the cabinet with a frown. "Rough night?" Leo nodded as he shuffled to the cabinet and read the directions, dumping a scoop into the mug before filling the rest with hot water from the tap. The interior of the mug quickly turned black as the powder dissolved within, mixing its contents with his finger before taking a swig, the bitter liquid slipping down his throat. "Uhm, we do have sugar, you know..." The words were lost on him as he took a seat at the table, staring at his reflection within the cup.  
  
     "Look at him." His doppelganger called, pointing to Mikey in his Chef's apron and orange board shorts, a deviant grin across his face. "Diligent. Dutiful. Caring. Subservient." Leonardo suppressed a hiss as he looked over toward Michelangelo, his brother staring back with a concerned look. A blink stripped Mikey of his clothes and slapped an orange collar around his neck, another blink and shake of his head dispelling the hallucination. "See? He's perfect."  
  
     "Leo, are you feeling okay? You look sick." Michelangelo wiped his hands on his apron and approached Leonardo cautiously, placing the back of a hand against Leo's forehead. "You're not running a fever. Did you not sleep at all last night?" Leonardo tried to flash a reassuring smile, though Michelangelo didn't buy it.  
  
     "Tell him what happened. He'll understand. He painted Raphael, after all. Perhaps he'll even help you?" Leonardo struggled to silence the doppelganger, even as he circled behind Michelangelo and wrapped his thick hands around Mikey's neck, squeezing it tight. "He was born to serve a Master."  
  
     "I had a nightmare. Kept me up all night, but I'll be okay." Leonardo lied solely by omission, a nervous chuckle escaping his throat as he watched his tongue drag along Mikey's cheek. "Probably ate too much pizza or something. Just need a pick me up." He raised the mug in a toast before downing the rest of the contents, his hallucinations dispelled entirely once he'd finished it. "Feeling better already." Michelangelo smiled and patted his shoulder before turning back to his work, hands plunging into the dough after a quick wash in the sink. Leonardo used it as an excuse to leave and head back towards his room, a chill running up his spine when another hand grabbed his shoulder from behind, Raphael's thick callouses digging into his skin.  
  
     "Hey, you mind if we talk?" Raphael smiled when Leo turned to look, unaware of the doppelgÃ¤nger looming behind him. "Woah. You feeling alright?" Leonardo jerked away nervously, stumbling backwards as he pivoted. "Calm down bro, it's me, Raph. What the hell happened?"  
  
     "Nightmare, didn't sleep well. I was actually going to go take a nap, relax a spell." Leonardo forced a more blatant lie onto Raphael, who no doubt heard him ask for and make instant coffee. "Maybe read or something. I dunno, I just feel out of sorts after last night. I'm fine." Raphael gripped both of his shoulders and squeezed tight, locking his gaze with Leonardo's own, even as Leo kept a nervous eye on the doppelganger. "What the...? Leo? Can you hear me?"  
  
     "Yes! I can, and I'm fine, and I'm going to go upstairs and...I'm fine!" He broke free of Raphael's grip and began hustling upstairs, his brother in hot pursuit. Even as he tried to lock himself in his room, Raphael forced the door open before his lock could latch, barging inside. "Raph, I'm fine." The doppelganger closed the door behind them, silently sliding the latch into place without a sound as Raphael stepped into the room, looking around. "Raph! I said I'm fine, go away!" His brother didn't acknowledge him as he pushed deeper into the room, a perplexed look on his face. Leo's heart raced as he watched the hallucination creep up behind Raphael, the loose brick of his bedroom wall clasped in his hands. "RAPH!"  
  
     "Where da hell...?" Raphael quipped to himself, time slowing down as dread seized Leo's heart, his brother slowly turning around to face the hallucination, a shocked expression on his face. "Leo...?" The brick came crashing down against Raphael's skull, the emerald turtle collapsing to the floor in an unconscious heap, Leonardo screaming in rage as he attacked the vision, his fist plunging right through the ghost and the door behind him, as if neither were there. He finally blinked, the brick clattering to the floor as he came to his senses. Raphael was sprawled out, unconscious, a bit of blood trickling from where the rough stone scraped his skin. It was a perfect blow, enough to incapacitate but not damage, calculated for capture, not harm. Leo's fingers trembled as he tried to make sense of what happened, how he clubbed Raphael so quickly, how any of this was possible. A slow set of claps jerked his attention toward the bed, his hallucination grinning back at him as he applauded.  
  
     "Oh dear, it looks like you did a bad thing." The turtle grinned at him, Leonardo in shock. "No turning back now." He was right, there was no turning back now. Leonardo looked down at Raphael's body and breathed heavily, the twin vision kneeling beside Raph and pointing at the inner lining of his shell. "You know what you have to do." Leonardo bent down and ran his fingers along the shell material, stopping as they brushed over the tracking sensor they all wore. He peeled it off of his brother and examined it in detail, a quick clench of his fist snapping it into pieces. "He's ours now."  
  
     Leonardo slowly stood upright, towering over Raphael as a grin creeped across his face. "Yes he is."

* * *

  
     When Raphael came to, the first thing he did was groan in pain loud enough for Leo to hear. The second thing he did was grunt in surprise, followed by tugging sharply at the chains binding his wrists to the water pipe running through Leo's closet, finding himself bound. Leonardo watched in silence as his brother struggled, his blurred vision finally meeting Leo's determined gaze. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to...I didn't mean to hit you like that." Raphael jerked angrily at that, his usual swears muffled by Leo's mask holding Raph's boxers into his jaw as a makeshift gag. "I guess I should explain." Raphael calmed down as Leo spoke, though his nostrils still flared with rage. "I...remember when we turned eighteen? We went on that patrol, and you broke off..." Raphael nodded slowly, Leonardo skipping ahead past the boring recap. "I saw you, Raphael." Raph raised an eye ridge in silent questioning at that, Leo's silence causing him to think back to that week, and then sigh outwardly as he recalled those goons face fucking him. "Yeah. I saw them using you, and I...I watched. The whole thing." Raphael sighed again and nodded, tilting his head to and fro to signal he surrendered to the claim. "I jerked off for the first time that night. To you, your raging, burning, impossibly strong will being so dominated, so used like that. You were so..." Leonardo sighed wistfully. "Then a few weeks ago, I start having...problems. I smell everyone in the house, and my meditation is disrupted, and then..." Raphael jerked the chains as Leonardo trailed off again, snapping him to attention.  
  
     "I had suppressed my desire for so long." Leonardo stood up from the edge of his bed and approached Raphael, his hands exploring Raph's bare chest. "I wanted you so badly, Raph. I wanted you to be mine." Raphael churred seductively at that, Leonardo's heart fluttering and giving him pause. "Then I saw what Mikey painted. What I thought was a one off...it wasn't. You loved it, loved this, and part of me just wanted to take you." He reached up and carefully undid Raphael's gag, his brother panting as the fabric was pulled free of his jaws. "To own you. Then we kissed, and we talked, and I realized I-"  
  
     "Loved me?" Raphael whispered, Leonardo nodding bashfully. "I heard ya through the door, and yeah, I love this kinky shit, but Jesus, Leo, a fuckin' brick? There's easier ways to get my attention." Raphael jerked his cuffs again, the chain rattling. "Mind letting me down?" Leonardo took a step back and frowned, shaking his head. "Okay, but I ain't really in the mood ta play, seein' as how I may have a concussion. I forgive ya, but I need to see Donnie for some first aid. He'll understand."  
  
     "No!" Leo snarled, clutching the fabric tighter in his fingers. "I've been haunted for so long, and now that I finally have you, I'm not going back." Leonardo smiled happily, tension melting from his fingers. "I'm not letting you go."  
  
     Raphael chuckled nervously and rattled his cuffs again, Leonardo making no moves to let him go. "C'mon Leo, this ain't funny. There's a time and place for dis, and right now? Post concussion? Now is not the time." Raphael stood on his tiptoes to try and get some leverage, finding the chain padlocked twice over around his wrists and the pipe, making sure no slack could be created on either end. "I ain't yer slave, I'm yer brother. I'll teach ya the difference and some other things when you let me down." Leonardo slowly closed the distance between them once more, his lips sealing against Raphael's just like their first kiss, this time with his tongue forcing its way into his brother's mouth, Raph's tongue attempting to block it at first before relenting with a groan. Leonardo broke the kiss as soon as Raphael yielded to him, stroking his handsome emerald brother's cheek. "Leo...it's alright, I won't leave ya, but this? What you're doing right now? This is wrong. If you cross this line, I'll never be able to love ya." Leonardo paused at that, fingers trembling again. "I'll never be able to trust ya as our leader. This is a big deal, bro. I know you want this so fuckin' bad, I do, trust me when I say I do, but this ain't right." Leo's breathing became more ragged as he was torn, his pupils little more than pinpricks as anxiety seized him.  
  
     "He's lying." The dark vision spoke, leaning against the wall beside Raphael's suspended form. "Gag him, fuck him, and own him. He's your toy, and toys don't have opinions." Leonardo looked at himself, and then to Raphael, that determined gaze of his brother staring worriedly at him.  
  
     "I can tell it's eating at you, bro." Raphael interjected, staying still. "So I'll make you a deal. I'm going to close my eyes, and open my mouth. If you gag me, you cross that line, and you, we, can never go back." Raphael did as he promised, closing his eyes and opening his jaw wide, Leonardo stepping forward with the fabric and looping it behind Raph's neck, wadding up the boxers. "But if you want this, to try this for real, to stay brothers, stay our leader...then go to my room. Open my dresser, bottom drawer, and bring me back the black box that's there. It's got a combination lock on it, and I'll tell you how to open it." Leonardo paused there, thinking. "One, or the other. The gag, or the box. You can't do both."  
  
     "It's a trick." The doppelganger shouted at him. "Don't believe his vicious lies. Gag that whore and teach him his place under your control."  
  
     "I've trusted you with my life since we were kids, Leo. Trust me just this once. I won't make a peep." Leonardo hesitated again, looking at his strung up brother with conflict in his heart. This is what he wanted, sure, but is this how he wanted it to happen? Clubbing his brother? Snapping his tracker and forging a note to run away? Chaining him up in his bedroom like a slave?"  
  
     "Of course this is what you want! It's right HERE! DO IT!" His hallucination grew louder and darker, tendrils of pure black slithering from his shadow. "CLAIM WHAT IS YOURS!"  
  
     "SHUT UP!" Leonardo shouted, Raphael freezing nervously in place and fearing the worst. Leonardo slowly removed his mask fabric and tossed it on the ground with a sob, falling back onto the floor and cradling his head in his hands while he wept. "This isn't me. This isn't right." Raphael closed his jaw and dared to look at his brother, Leonardo's tears streaming down his cheeks. "I'm a fucking monster, Raph. I'm sick."  
  
     Raphael was helpless to actually do anything other than watch Leonardo break down, even as the chains bit into his flesh with pain. Leonardo eventually picked himself up and fumbled the key from his belt, approaching him and reaching for the chains. "Stop, go get the box I asked for." Leonardo didn't listen, the key clicking into the padlocks and popping them open, the heavy chains almost instantly unwinding from his wrists. Raph immediately reached around Leo's shell and squeezed him tight, his brother sobbing still. "It's alright. It's alright, Leo." Raphael held him for what seemed like an eternity, his own chest pounding at his own narrow escape. The two of them stood there in that one-sided embrace until Leo had cried himself to exhaustion, Raphael carefully guiding his brother to the bed and tucking him under the sheets. He planted a kiss on Leo's forehead with a soft smile, the fearless leader out like a light in minutes.  
  
     Raphael glanced around the room once again, taking stock of what just happened. His own brother, their leader, had assaulted and kidnapped him, intending to enslave him, and all because he was too damn repressed to fucking ask in the first place. Yet Raphael knew he shared the burden, hiding who he was for so long out of fear for his brother's sensibilities, a tactic that almost ended up destroying their family. As he left Leonardo's room and shut the door behind him, he caught sight of Mikey and Donatello down on the sofa below, both of them turning to face him at the noise of Leo's door clacking into the frame. Their shared look of bemusement quickly turned to shocked frowns at Raphael's solemn expression, a heavy sigh escaping his chest as he leaned against the railing. "It's time we talked to Leo, and get all of this out in the open." Donatello and Michelangelo looked at each other with a determined nod, jumping up from the couch and starting to cleanup their mess. "Not tonight. Though I think I've got a concussion, Don, and I think I'm gonna need a new shell tracker."


	6. Discussions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's time for a heart-to-heart between Leonardo and his brothers, to figure out how to move forward.

     When Leonardo woke from his slumber, the first thing he noticed was the excessive burning in his eyes, and the dry, sticky skin under them from where he'd fallen asleep crying. He slowly rubbed at them as he roused from the bed and sat up straight, his blurred vision slowly coming into focus and revealing his dimly lit room. The chains still dangled from the sewer pipe, devoid of any occupant, and last night's memories came flooding to the forefront of his mind. His chest pained as he felt he couldn't breathe, heart racing while the vessels in his eyes constricted, narrowing his field of view. He'd clubbed his brother with a brick, strung him up like meat in a butcher, came so close to crossing that final line and claiming him as property...yet he didn't. He remembers letting him go, sobbing openly, admitting he was little more than a corrupt monster, and then...darkness, a warm darkness of sleep. He wheezed as panic subsided in his body, the attack dwindling as quickly as it occurred. He took a deep breath and surveyed the room, eyes going wide as he spotted Raphael napping in a camper chair by the doorway, a red flannel blanket draped over his body. "Raph...?" Leo croaked aloud, his brother stirring and smacking his lips as he woke up, rubbing at his eyes.   

     "Mm. Hey, you're finally awake." Raphael yawned and smiled at him, his left foot kicking at something on the floor. "He's awake you guys." Donatello bolted upright as if he were struck by lightning, Michelangelo following suit with a fair more relaxed pace. Leo craned his head around to look, seeing that all three of them had setup cots and sleeping bags at the foot of his bed for the night, a flood of thoughts reigniting that panic within himself. Was he to be punished? Did they not trust him anymore? Was his place as leader forever taken from him? He noticed Donatello leaning over him far too late to resist the bright flashlight shining in his eyes, Don's Vice like grip keeping his head still as the light switched between his pupils, the aperture contracting and expanding in turn. Raphael had started moving around to the other side of Leo's bed while Mikey climbed up to the foot of it, propping himself up on the edge by his elbows. 

     "His eyes are fine. Leo, do you know who I am?" Leonardo nodded confusingly, gently squeezing Donatello's arm. 

     "Of course I do. You're Donatello, the lazy oaf at the foot of my bed is Michelangelo, and..." He paused as he looked up at Raphael, quickly averting his gaze from his brother's amber eyes. "Raphael." Don nodded and sat against him on the left side of the bed, sliding a contact thermometer across his forehead while his other hand probed the lymph nodes in Leo's head and neck, his flesh dimpling beneath the firm touch. "I don't think I'm physically sick, Don. Just...mentally." He was loathe to admit it, though the fact his doppelganger was leaning against the wall opposite his bed and glaring at him meant he needed to be honest. "I need help."   

     "I know. Raph filled us in, and it's alright." Donatello was satisfied with his examination, though Leo could tell by his expression alone that he was having a difficult time asking the important questions, especially with the other two in the room. "Could we have some privacy?"  

     "No. They should stay." Leonardo interjected, his hallucination throwing up his hands in defeat, a signal he'd made the right call. It would be more embarrassing to him to do this openly, but it would keep him honest, transparent. "I can't be trusted to be honest one-on-one. You all need to work together to make sure I don't lie my way out of this, okay?" The vision hissed angrily even as his brothers nodded in acknowledgement. "Oh shut up." The three looked curiously at him after the quip, Leonardo sighing outwardly and motioning for Don to continue. 

     "Uhm...who did you want to shut up, Leo?" Don asked with genuine curiosity, a reassuring hand on Leonardo's left hand, Raphael's strong grasp on his right shoulder as Leonardo pointed toward the wall, all three of them turning to face it. "Michelangelo hasn't said anything."  

     "Not Mikey, him." Leonardo pointed again, more accusingly. "My double. Well, hallucination I guess." Mikey muttered a hushed 'cool' while Don went wide-eyed, once again checking Leonardo's eyes and head for abnormalities.

     "You've been hallucinating?" Don repeated the obvious, Leo giving a nod while staring down the crystal-clear vision in front of him, each of them angry at the other. "And you've been aware you were hallucinating?" Leo nodded again, Raphael finally interrupting.

     "I thought you said people couldn't tell when they were hallucinatin', Don." He looked worryingly at Leonardo, who sank back into the bed with a depressed sigh. Donatello shook his head as he finished checking up on Leo's well-being once again, finally relaxing a little bit.

     "I said those suffering from psychopathy can't. Leo seems to have suffered from, and I'm not a Doctor so don't take this as a diagnosis or anything, but I think he suffered from pedunucular hallucinosis." The room was silent as Don rattled off the term as if he expected them all to know it, exhaling dejectedly as nobody acknowledged it. "It's a strong visual hallucination. Looks real, sounds real, can even smell real. Very rarely can sufferers tell they're hallucinating, but occasionally..." Don motioned to Leo with a flourish. "...they can. Stopping them is another matter, obviously." Leo stared at the hallucination once again, everyone slowly turning to see what he was staring at. "Is he still here?"    

     "Yeah." Leo murmured as he watched the ghostly visage move towards that loose brick again, his fingers tickling over the stone. "Uhm, make sure I'm not moving, okay guys?" They nodded, Raphael and Donatello moving to squeeze him up between them, each grabbing at his arms and holding tight. The hallucination frowned and withdrew from the brick, disappearing as he stepped into the light of Leo's bedside lamp. "He's gone."  

     "Who is he?" Raphael asked first before Donatello could continue the medical exam, a blush spreading over Leo's cheeks. "You said he's you...but you're right here. So who is he, really?" 

     "He's who I want to be." Leonardo confessed, Don and Raph swapping a look of confusion. "He's stronger than me, but slower. He flaunts his sexuality, and he's very controlling, very...I think the word is dominant." Raphael sighed this time around as Leo continued. "He wears nothing but the blackest leather, too. I don't like clothes, but on him, they look so good, so handsome." Don rubbed at the bridge between his eyes, Raphael glaring over at him.

     "Don't, Donnie."

     "Leo, did you see Mikey's artwork of Raphael by chance?" Leonardo nodded bashfully again, Don glaring at Mikey and Raph in equal measure. "I told you two not to let him see those until he talked to me." Leo tried to interject, though Raphael's hot headed nature exploded before he could speak.  

     "Hey, don't ya dare try and coddle him like a child, Don. I didn't know he saw dat, otherwise I woulda explained it to him! Fuck, I didn't even know he liked dat shit till I woke up chained to the water main!" Michelangelo had jumped to his feet as well, protesting his innocence.

     "Same! I tried to steer him toward your stuff since it's vanilla, but he took my laptop!" Don glowered at Michelangelo as Leonardo stifled a laugh, the baby brother pouting. "Oh come on, this is so not my fault. Maybe if you two had been up front to begin with..." 

     "We didn't want to offend him!" Donatello shouted back, Raphael backing up the argument with a nod of his head. "He didn't seem interested, and so we all agreed - you too, Michelangelo - to keep it private until and unless he asked!"   

     Leonardo coughed several times to dispel the ongoing argument, the three of them turning their attention to him. "Doesn't it matter at all what I want or think?" The three fell over themselves to apologize and acknowledge him, Leonardo taking a cue from Splinter by raising his palm up vertically, the reflexive silence echoing around the room. "Huh, so that actually works coming from me." Leonardo mused aloud, before shaking the grin from his face. "Look, it's my fault, if anyone's. I saw Raphael enjoying a perfectly consensual bondage game a few years ago, and rather than be an adult and ask about it, I kept it to myself. I let my desires fester, and boil, and stew, until the pot ran over and, well...this happened." Leonardo eyeballed Raphael cautiously. "Which, as a side note, I thought you weren't supposed to sleep with a concussion Raphael."

     "Doctor D cleared me while you slept. Also gave me the next gen shell tracker while he was at it." Raphael beamed with pride and rubbed Leo's shell, causing him to churr softly before he continued.   

     "My point is, this is my problem, and I can't fix it alone. I should've asked for help back then, but I'm asking for it now. I just hope I haven't broken your trust in me in the meantime." Leonardo's gaze turned downward along with his tone at the end, the weight of shame weighing heavily on him. There was a moment of silence until Raphael spoke up, a reassuringly firm grip on Leo's arm and shell.   

     "So ya clubbed me wit a brick, strung me up like a slab of meat, and was on da border of enslaving me." Raphael cocked that infamous grin of his. "Big fuckin' deal. What matters is ya didn't. Ya respected me enough to not cross dat line." Leonardo smiled weakly, Raphael cupping his chin and turning it towards him, their lips meeting in a brief kiss. "I love ya, bro. Always have. We'll get through dis as a family, like always." Donatello and Michelangelo murmured in agreement, tears once again welling up in Leo's sore eyes, hastily brushing them away. "But dere's gonna be some changes, for your own good. We need ta be a family again, no more secrets like dis. Privacy is one thing, but what happened tonight wouldn't have happened at all if we'd been open and honest about dis."  

     "Raph, hang on a second-" Donatello interjected, Raphael shouting him down for a rare change.   

     "It's nothin' serious Don, but he needs to grow up, join us in society so to speak. Nothin' personal bro, but you've not exactly matured much since ya were a teenager." Leonardo blushed even harder at that, Raphael giving him a good ribbing. "I only date men, not boys. Ya want me, ya need to show me what sorta man ya are. I already know you're a great leader, so show us you're a great boyfriend, or husband." Donatello and Michelangelo glanced at each other knowingly, Leonardo picking up on it and looking toward Raphael.    

     "Alright. You're right, I've been so focused on being a good leader, I guess I never let myself grow up elsewhere. Otherwise I wouldn't have been so immature about it all." Raphael squeezed Leo's shoulder reassuringly, fingers digging into the skin. "So I guess I'm leaving it up to you three to coach and guide me in that. Is that alright?" The three nodded in agreement, a smile sweeping across Leo's face.    

     "I know how to start!" Michelangelo chirped up, a beam of excitement on his face even as Donatello and Raphael snapped toward him, frustration in their eyes.    

     "No." Don and Raph grunted in unison, Leo looking very confused.

     "But he'll like it!" Mikey pouted, putting in his watery eyes of innocence for full effect.

     Leo couldn't help but probe. "Like what?" 

     "Don't ask." The stereo of Don and Raph responding in unison only confused him further, Michelangelo pushing his point more.

     "He needs to grow up anyway, right? So why not try it my way?" His other two brothers were about to shut down Mikey again, Leonardo interjecting once more, partly to rib them back. 

     "Try what his way?" Don and Raph weren't privy to the deviant smile on Leo's face, though Mikey sure was as the two responded in that stereophonic unison again.  

     "Don't ask!" They glared at Leo this time around, melting in embarrassment at the grin on his face, with Donatello speaking up. "Mikey has a thing-" Their olive brother glared at Michelangelo. "-HIS THING ALONE - that he tries to push on us from time to time. Raph and I aren't interested, and we doubt you'd be either." Leonardo pressed his lips into a thin line and thought for a bit on that, the idea that even Mikey isn't as innocent as he seemed in that regard, or that the photos he saw of his little brother still hid something.

     "Ignore him, he's a prude anyway." Michelangelo spoke up, the smell of toast likely filling Donnie's nose as he had a stroke of anger. "Come oooon, it's so relaxing and I promise you won't regret it."

     "Maybe later, Mikey." Leonardo smiled at him. "I'm serious. Maybe later we can talk about it together, okay?" He gave Raph and Don's hands a squeeze. "That goes for all of us. Part of growing up is trying new things, experimenting, relishing as much in failure as you do in success. I did that as a leader, and you all did that as men. Now I need to join you, and likewise, you can introduce me to things that are important to you." Donatello and Raphael looked a bit nervous at that statement initially, but relented with a smile. "Good. So...who should I listen to, then?"  

     Raphael straightened up. "What do you mean? You're the leader, bro, we follow you." Leonardo shook his head with a smile, giving Raph's hand another squeeze.  

     "Not at home I'm not. I can't very well lead down a path I cannot see. I need you three to show me what's out there, but also know when to step back and let me choose which I take." Donatello picked up on the meaning immediately, stepping up to the plate before the other two could jump at the chance.   

     "I'll guide you first, then. If that's alright." Leonardo was hesitant at the offer at first, until Raphael returned the vice grip squeeze on his right hand, affirming Don's recommendation. "I'll even keep the lectures to a minimum. Okay?"

     Leonardo nodded. "Deal. At home, I'm yours, Don. I'm sure I'm in good hands." Michelangelo let out an audible pout while Raphael slapped Leo's shell heartily, the general mood much more relaxed than when they started. "What time is it, anyway?"

     "It's late. You slept eight hours or so, but it's still technically the early morning hours. I'd say 3, maybe 4am." Donatello volunteered, giving Leo's hand a tug. "It's also time for you to get to the infirmary. Come on, Donnie's orders." Leonardo chuckled as he was pulled from the bed, Raphael and Michelangelo splitting off to their rooms for some sleep after making sure Don would be okay alone. The infirmary was brightly lit with a strange contraption setup in the middle, a set of foam padding laid out under a giant doughnut. "Go sit on the foam, and put your head through the doughnut."  

     "What the hell is this?" Leonardo showed some concern, a feeling shared by Donatello. "It looks like a torture device."

     "It's a portable MRI. I uh...'borrowed' some research designs and computer code from a research hospital, and built one here. It lets me see inside your head." Leonardo raised an eye ridge at that, clearly a little put off. "Look, I'll be honest: those hallucinations worry me. They could be caused be any number of things, but the most common cause is brain lesions. You sit there, I do some scans, and can check you out in half an hour. Then we can plan treatment." Leonardo sighed as Donatello moved to the device, making sure everything was connected. 

     "About that...what are my treatment options?" Leonardo was understandably perturbed by recent events, and sought reassurance that everything would be alright from Donatello's gifted intellect.  "Pills? Therapy? Surgery?"

     "Surgery first, usually, though I'm not about to crack our skulls open in order to root around in there.  This is more for confirmation and diagnosis, than to aid treatment." Donatello never minced words, though this is one time he wished he had.  The thought of this hallucination being permanent was terrifying to him, especially given his actions under its influence already.  The thought of being kept confined to his room or restrained to prevent harm made his anxiety bubble forth into a sweat, his breathing somewhat ragged.  "You okay in there?"

     "Yeah. Just a little claustrophobic I guess." Leonardo lied, Donatello wisely not poking it any further as computers whirred to life, a distinct hum around his head.

     "Stay perfectly still. This will take a while, and we can't take any breaks, okay?"  Leonardo gave a thumbs up as Donatello clicked the mouse a few times, a series of audible clicks ringing in his ears as the machine did its function.  "Don't worry about the noise, it's not loud enough to cause hearing damage." Donatello had to shout, but not uncomfortably so, and the click was somewhat reassuring in its own, strange sense.  He was about to close his eyes and attempt to meditate until another stern warning came from his brother.  "And no meditation! Head straight, body still, eyes forward!" Leonardo sighed while maintaining his rigid pose for the procedure, the foam cushions far less comfortable now that he had to imitate a statue.

     He was ready to tell Donatello to shove it when the machine abruptly stopped, the sound of Don shuffling around and clicking on the computers seemingly indicating he was done.  "Can I get out of this thing now?"

     "Yeah! Come take a look at your brain." Donatello's voice was giddy, clearly excited to try out his new toy on Leonardo, even if it wasn't under ideal circumstances.  He crawled out of the device and over to Donatello's computers to take a look, blinking in surprise at the grainy, yet clearly defined cross-sections of his skull.  "Pretty cool, huh? I can only get five millimeter slices, since this isn't exactly calibrated precisely or anything, but it should be good enough for what I'm looking for." Leo couldn't help but stare at the grainy, grayscale images with a bit of awe and a slack smile, amused at the ability to literally peer inside his brain.  "Anyway, take a seat while I review these. Shouldn't take me too long." He gave Don a nod and took a seat on the other available wheelie stool there, Donatello's fingers clicking and typing like an excited child with a new video game. Time seemed to pass much faster watching his brother work, and it wasn't long before he was beckoned back over by his olive skinned brother, lips pressed into a thin line.

     Leonardo tried to lighten the mood a bit. "What's up, Doc?" Donatello didn't smile or chuckle, which only made Leo's heart sink. Whatever this was, it was bad. "Seriously, what's up Don? How bad is it?"    

     Donatello stroked his chin before thrusting a finger at a specific image, circling it around a spot. "That's what's likely causing your hallucinations. Remember our patrol from a few weeks ago?" Leonardo nodded. He'd been careless, and a rogue foot soldier had got a solid blow against the side of his head, and Don had stitched it up like normal along with a dose of bedrest. He'd spent it meditating and practicing of course, instead of resting in bed, but even that wasn't out of the ordinary for him. "Looks like it left a lesion on your brain, here." Don circled the spot again, Leonardo still seeing nothing he could identify. "I'm no Doctor, and I'm definitely not a MRI technician, but I'd wager that's what's causing the hallucinations. 

     "Except I see him when I meditate too, Don. Would that be the same thing?" Donatello shook his head, chin still grasped between his fingers in thought.    

     "I don't think so. This would be strictly hallucinations, and meditation is more like...it's more akin to a dream state than hallucinating. Chances are your brain just took what was easy, and made it manifest." Leonardo hummed, annoyed. If he'd not meditated and focused on that so hard, he may not have hallucinated it in the first place. Once again, it was his fault he'd put his family at risk like that. "As for treatment, well...these hallucinations are usually caused by excess serotonin, or that at least triggers it. Combined with your already heightened sexual arousal, I can only imagine how vivid they were to you."  

     "He looked, smelled as real as the three of you." Leonardo confessed, sighing again. "Alright then, so...what next?" 

     "What's next is a mandatory order of bedrest for you. No exceptions this time." Leonardo raised his hands in surrender at chest level, Donatello shaking his head. "I don't think you understand. You're having dangerous hallucinations as a result of a traumatic brain injury. You've assaulted Raphael, and there's no telling what you might do to us." Leonardo's heart sank as Don continued, feeling his bonds of trust rattle and crack with each word. "I...I need to make sure you're following my treatment regimen. Fully. Every pill, every time."  

     Leo let out a heavy sigh. "What do you want from me, Don? I'll do anything to rebuild your trust in me, everyone's trust in me." Donatello clicked off the monitors on the computer and grabbed his shoulders firmly, squeezing the flesh beneath his fingers as Don's gaze met his own. "I'm serious." 

     "I know you are. Just remember that everything I do, I do for you. It won't seem like it, but it's true." Leonardo nodded while keeping his gaze locked with Don's, his brother sighing outward as his grip released. "After Raphael clued me in to what happened, I...prepared." Don slid open the door to the side-room of the infirmary, a place he kept in case any of them needed isolated care. It was meager and small, but enough: a TV, a bed, a sink, and a toilet. The difference this time was the straps crossing over the bed linens, all of them anchored to the bed frame or notches in the floor, clearly meant for restraint. Leonardo stared at the ensemble before taking a deep breath, moving towards the bed while Don stayed in the doorway. "Leo, I'm not forcing you to do this. If you can stay in your room, we can change watches on a schedule, monitor-" 

     "It's fine." Leonardo forced a reassuring smile to Don as he sat in the middle of the bed, eyeballing the complex kit stretched across it. "You're the Doctor. You know best, and besides...I guess I feel like I deserve it." That wasn't a lie. Cracking a brick over Raphael's skull absolutely deserved punishment and atonement of some sort, even if he wasn't in control at the time. Maybe this way, he'll better accept the forgiveness his family has offered him. "So, you going to strap me in...?"

     "You're sure?" Leonardo nodded again, Donatello taking a long, deep breath inward. "Alright. Lay down on your back. The mattress is foam, and should conform to your shell nicely. Get as comfortable as you can, arms at your sides." Leonardo gave a nod and slowly laid himself out on the bed, the foam sinking beneath him almost immediately upon applying pressure and making it difficult to adjust himself. Even so, he found a posture he found delightfully relaxing, and gave the thumbs up to Donatello. His brother moved to the bed and started at the ankles, straps wrapping around them likes cuffs before running back down along the sides, a series of clicks ringing out as Don snapped something in place repeatedly. "Go ahead and try moving your ankles. Side to side, up and down, the full range of motion." Leonardo complied, expecting some freedom given the soft feel of the cuffs and straps against his skin, but surprisingly finding none at all, not even an inch. "Good. Not too tight or uncomfortable?" He shook his head and Donatello continued upward, a similar apparatus securing his thighs. His wrists were done next, at which point he could finally see the little black bolts Don was threading through the straps and cuffs, clearly plastic yet hefty like metal. He gave his wrists a tug when they were secured, feeling a bit nervous at his helplessness.  

     "I can't move at all. What is this, Don?" His brother frowned as two straps came across his chest next, pulling him down against the mattress and their counterparts beneath him, his head, fingers and toes being the only mobile limbs left.  

     "It's called segufix. Used in mental hospitals, primarily. Designed to be comfortable, yet secure, so they can be worn long term." Donatello's fingers cupped his head and lifted it up, another strap coiling around his forehead and behind his skull, a few clicks securing it in place to the mattress, Donatello slipping a pillow under his head before letting his fingers leave. They soon returned with a final strap around his neck, the cool material tickling his throat as it too was locked into place. "Try moving." Leonardo complied, the straps tugging and snapping tight with even the slightest movement of his body, even when he attempted to turn his head around. "Harder." He gave it his all, muscles bulging with strain as he struggled against them in futility. "Alright, that's fine. Open your mouth and palms please."  

     "Why?" Leonardo asked, chest rising with nervous breaths. Donatello did not respond, only seizing the open mouth and shoving his fingers inside, thoroughly checking inside his cheeks, under his tongue, and even behind his tonsils for anything, even going so far as to trigger his gag reflex before withdrawing. He coldly checked every nook and cranny under Leonardo's body and crevice of his shell and plastron, carefully inspecting his hands. "I'm making sure you didn't pocket a key. We're ninjas, after all. Sorry." Don's grip slid down his arms and legs as well, even checking the toes and the crack of his anus, giving a final dip in Leonardo's genital slit for good measure. "You're clean."

     "I could've told you that." Leonardo tried to force some humor into the situation, Don's eyes looking sad and defeated as he stood over his bound brother. "Cheer up, Don. This won't be forever. It won't even be for long, will it?" Donatello was silent, his eyes averting Leo's gaze. "Will it?"

     "I hope not. This is new ground for us, Leo." His lips pressed into that pained line again, his hands grabbing at his upper arms anxiously. "I'm not exactly well read on brain injuries, so this is kind of the seat of my pants. I have to protect us before I can treat you, and...and it hurts." A tear streaked down his cheek as he spoke, quivering. "You're our leader, Leo, and, and...I'm sorry."

     "Hey, hey. Nothing to be sorry for, Donatello. We've been through worse, and we'll make it through this." Leonardo forced his smile again, staring at the ceiling. "Just do what you need to. Not like I'm going anywhere." He heard Donatello sniffle as he walked out of sight, the light to the room going out. "Goodnight Don."    

     "Goodnight, Leo." The door closed and plunged Leonardo into darkness, the weight of his failure weighing heavily on him. He sighed as his double stared down at him with a grin, arms crossed.    

     "I'm not going anywhere."


	7. Penance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> For every action, there's an equal and opposite reaction. For Leonardo, penance must be paid before treatment can truly begin.

     Three weeks. According to his brothers, he'd spent three weeks in this room, confined to this bed, only allowed to stretch or exercise when two guards were present: one in the room with him, and one outside the door, watching on a small CCTV system Donatello had rigged up. The cuffs and straps had become daily attire, as comfortable and constant as his belt or pads used to be, and despite the tragedy of it all, he had to admit he wasn't doing too badly. Far from solitary confinement, he was frequently visited or kept company by one of his brothers, and Mikey had even convinced Don to let him hold family dinners in the operating theater every night. He spent them secured to his bed, of course, but one of them took turns feeding him while they chatted and spoke, even as Leonardo's twin glared or laughed at his weak and helpless state. They'd withdrawn from surface life while he underwent treatment at Don's careful hand, wanting to avoid the stigma of mental illness from affecting their friends or family above. While he was alone now, Michelangelo had set him up with some new game system of his, a screen mounted from an IV drip rack over his head, a controller in either hand, and a game letting him roam a spacious fantasy realm of swords and sorcery.

     "You're pathetic." His double sneered, Leonardo clicking the trigger to swing his virtual sword. "You could lie your way to freedom, take them all under your thumb, lead them as your powerful army of slaves." He chewed on his lip as the enemy blocked his attack in the game, making his character stumble. "Ignoring me doesn't make me disappear."

     "Maybe not, but at least this is new and interesting. You've been spitting the same venom for weeks, now. I'm surprised hallucinations don't get bored." He'd began having full conversations with his double self, hoping to tame and embrace it in an effort to make it go away entirely. At the very least, it provided him with conversation when his brothers were busy. "Why do you want me to control them so bad? To cross that line?" He swung his sword sideways, the enemy screaming as it fell dead. "Damn, nothing good. You think a Stormcloak General would have a magic item on them, or something."

     "Because your place is as their Master! You own them!" The twin shouted to him, the noise empty of echo or reverb. "You're the supreme being!"

     "You're a nutjob. They still view me as their leader, I'm just sick is all." Leo set off up the mountain once more, rock turning to snow beneath the crunch of his boots. "I'm not going to hurt my brothers just to make this part of me happy. Love is more important than control."

     "If you had control, I wouldn't be here." Leonardo paused the game, the doppelganger grinning wide. "You know it's true."

     It was true. Don said the lesion had almost entirely healed itself during their last MRI scan, and a dose of benzodiazepines had kept his serotonin in check. Technically, this hallucination should be gone, or at least less frequent. Perhaps he wasn't a hallucination after all? The thought had crossed Donatello's mind, as well as Leo's, but they'd put it on the back burner until everything else had been ruled out. Daily blood draws and urine samples showed normal levels across the board, so it wasn't an infection, either, and eye tests showed nothing abnormal either. Donatello was stumped, and Leo was eager for new information to pass along. "You're right. Alright then, let's assume you're not a biological hallucination. Without freeing myself from this bed, what can I do to make you go away?" For once, the shadow was silent in thought. "You and I are the same, right? I want something that's not being met, and you're a mental image manipulating me. The fact you don't have the strength over me as before, the realism, means you're all in my head now. So unless you want me to imagine you out of existence, tell me what I want."

     "Them." The shadow disappeared as a knock came at the door, the fluorescent lamps lighting up the room and temporarily blinding his vision. Raphael slipped in and closed the door behind him, a hot bowl of ramen balanced on one hand while a soda was tucked in the waistband of his gym shorts. Leonardo mmmed at the delicious scent filling the air, instinctively pulling at his straps in an attempt to sit up.

     "Hold your horses, bro, I got ya." He could see Raphael's grin as his brother sat everything down on a small table, the whole bed lifting up as Raph pumped up the two jacks positioned beneath it, tilting him upward so he could eat. Don had taken every precaution in keeping him tied down, and while embarrassing at first, he quickly grew to enjoy the first class service of sorts. "There. I heard ya talkin', little shit still won't leave ya alone?" Leonardo shook his head while Raphael took a seat, grabbing the bowl of ramen and giving it a stir. "Mike got us a good shipment of pork on his run the other night, so savor this. Best damn ramen I've had in years." There was another balancing act as Raph laid a bib out over his neck and chest, Leonardo licking his lips as he waited for that first serving of hot noodles. His brother obliged with a wide grin, a hearty churr escaping his throat as he consumed the delicious offering.

     "Oh my god, you weren't kidding!" They shared a laugh as Raphael served him another helping, a happy little squirm in his bonds as the hot meal soothed his belly. "This is delicious!" A crack and hiss of the soda can preceded its offering to his lips, the sugary beverage a treat only Raphael would sneak in. The two had a lot of time to talk while he was kept restrained, unable to truly admonish his brother or risk pushing him to a fight given his present state. They'd grown closer, and his daily apologies had slowly withered to none as they moved past that unpleasant night. "Hey Raph, can I ask for something?"

     "Sure. What's up?"

     "I want you to kiss me." There was a beat between them as the words hung on the air, Raphael finally letting a grin spread across his lips before planting them on Leo's cheek, making him blush.  "Not like that, you dope...I want to really kiss you." Raphael's smile faded a bit as he stirred the ramen bowl, looking down into the soup and avoiding Leo's eyes.

     "Once you're outta here, you can come find me and give me the hardest kiss you want. Deal?" Leo nodded his head as much as the restraints would allow, Raphael feeding him some more ramen and soda in turn. The conversation was light, mainly involving Raph enquiring about the game he was staying occupied with during his long bouts of downtime, with Leo happy to gloat about translating his ninja skills from real life to a video game.  Lunch was soon finished, with Raphael cleaning up Leo's chest and chin with a towel as he stacked the utensils and dishes together.  "You seem to be enjoying yourself, at least."

     "Enjoy isn't the term I'd use, but yeah, this isn't so bad. I guess I grew used to it, the confinement I mean." Leonardo thought he saw a sparkle in Raph's eye at the admission, but dismissed it as more mind tricks.  "I'm eager to get out of it, though. When did Don say that may happen?"

     "He didn't, but I'll talk with him. Keeping ya confined ain't gonna get ya well." Raphael smiled slightly, standing up from the chair and kicking it to the corner.  "He's been workin' on somethin' anyway." Leo gave another nod as Raphael lowered him back down to resting position once more, picking up the game where he left off as his brother left the room, a lock of the door preempting the dimming of the lights within.  With no clocks on the wall, time was impossible to actually keep track of after so long.  His brothers had mentioned he'd been here for three weeks, but who was to say it wasn't one week? Or two months? His sedentary lifestyle had taken its toll on his muscles, most having atrophied and weakened to far below the peak levels he maintained them at for patrols and fighting, a fact that annoyed him greatly.  Even if it meant some other form of control, he really just wanted to get out into the lair proper again, to exercise and workout.  Cardio with Don, weight lifting with Raph, sparring with Mike, all of it sounded gloriously appealing right now.

     The door clanked loudly before being slid aside, the fluorescent lights filling the space with their medical white light once more. Donatello slipped in first with a collar dangling from his wrist, his lab coat covering the gym outfit he'd no doubt been wearing all day. Raphael followed behind wheeling a cart of medical supplies, while Michelangelo bounced in behind them, shutting the door with an impish grin. "Well, I've got some good news Leonardo. Your test results show no continuing abnormalities, so it means you just need some therapy and treatment to contain any residual effects of your injury." Leonardo jostled in his restraints with a hopeful smile, even as Raphael pulled a pair of disposable gloves from the cart and snapped them over his hands, rummaging through its contents with a grim look on his face. "In the event you have another episode like before, this collar should stop you before it gets out of hand. Mike, would you mind?" Michelangelo nodded and flounced to the head of the bed, holding Leo's head tight with his palms while Donatello slipped the collar around his neck, the metal and electrics feeing heavy against his skin, two pricks of cold steel pressing against his spine. He felt it tighten against him as Don screwed it shut, wincing as it bit into his flesh. "There. Thanks Mike." Michelangelo let go and stepped back out of sight, Raphael kneeling down along the side of the bed next to Donatello, a breathing bag and syringe in either of his hands. "I should explain. That collar is tied into your shell tracker, which reads your vital signs. I noticed that your hallucinations tended to coincide with increased levels of adrenaline and blood pressure, so I modified this collar to immobilize you if those levels get out of bounds."

     "So no more patrols? Or fighting? Or even sparring?" Leo couldn't help but frown while Raphael tore open a disinfectant wipe, cleaning his upper arm with long, firm strokes. "Don, that basically grounds me here, to the lair. That's not much of an improvement." Donatello gave another nod, his prideful smile fading to a thin, firm line.

     "I know, but it means you'll have freedom of movement at home, at least during the day, and that's key to your recovery." Leonardo was about to protest to Donatello, his brother shaking his head preemptively. "Leo, you said you trusted me, remember? I know this seems unfair now, but it will help with your recovery, I promise. You can still meditate, exercise, play games, train, whatever you like here at home."

     "And if we have to flee? If we're attacked, or I'm needed to fight and lead us?" Leonardo barked, eyes narrowing. "Look, Don, I know you mean well, but this is-" A sharp prick of his skin accompanied a shocking warmth as Raphael injected the syringe contents into his body, Donatello glancing staying silent. "What the hell was that?"

     "Sorry Leo, but we need ta make sure this works." Raph's offered sympathy made Leo worry more, especially as the breathing bag was placed over his mouth and secured over his head. "Don't panic, we got ya bro."

     "Why would-" Leo gasped sharply as every single muscle in his body contracted at once save for his heart, his lungs unable to move air in or out of them, even his eyelids unable to blink. Raphael immediately began squeezing the bottle to inflate his lungs while the collar interrupted his nervous system, fearful eyes staring up at Donatello in betrayal. His brothers had dosed him, tied him down, and now could have killed him had they been unprepared.

     "Perhaps I had pegged you wrong." His doppelganger grinned down at him from behind Donatello, face obscured by blackness. Leo's body struggled to move, to breathe, to live at all even as the collar continued to discharge into his spinal cord. "You lead them topside, yet down here, they lead you." Leo tried to scream in pain, or protest to his double, both denied to him. "I'm not you as a Master..." He watched his vision step between Raphael and Donatello, its hot breath tickling his skin as he leaned down to Leo's ear, whispering the sweetest of secrets. "I'm how you see yourself as a slave." As the double stood up and walked free of the room, Donatello grabbed a syringe from the cart and pulled up another drug, jamming it harshly into Leo's veins and dumping another drug into his system. The world began to spin and darken around him as unconsciousness dragged him into its depths, that dark laughter echoing in his head as he slipped into an empty sleep.

     When Leonardo awoke, he was still strapped to the cot. His lungs burned, his eyes stung, and every muscle in his body felt as if they'd had a hard workout. Donatello was sitting in a chair nearby reading a book and for the first time, he noticed that his head was unstrapped completely, allowing a freedom of movement he hadn't had in weeks. His excitement was short lived, though, as his double had returned to his vision with a devious grin on its face, this time fully visible. "I know something you don't know..." The vision dissipated as Donatello glanced up from his book, clasping it shut with one hand as he smiled.

     "Ah, you're awake. Sorry about that, Raph went a little overboard on the adrenaline. What should've been a simple test ended up being a lesson learned." Leonardo groaned as his brother stood up from the chair and set the book down atop it, striding over to his bedside. "How are you feeling?"

     Leonardo groaned loudly. "Like shit, Don. That's overkill, even for you." He rolled his head around to stretch his muscles, the bite of the collar quickly reasserting itself and making him sigh. "You left it on?" Donatello nodded as he leaned down, disconnecting a power lead from its port. "Oh goodie, you recharged it."

     "Safety first, Leo. You'll get used to it." Leonardo rolled his eyes and growled, Donatello dipping into his coat pocket and producing a controller. "Manual release. Just in case." Leonardo froze at the sight of it, his brother's thumb hovering over the button. "Relax, Leo. I'm not out to hurt you, just doing my job by protecting all four of us. You're still not well." He took a deep breath and exhaled slowly, focusing on stabilizing his mood, lest he get zapped again. Donatello pocketed it once more once he was satisfied Leo was relaxed and calm, retrieving the key to the bonds from the same pocket, and slowly undoing the straps holding him down. "There we go. That's very good, just stay calm." The words were patronizing in their reassurance, yet Leo knew he had no choice but to accept them at face value as he was released. He sat up on the bed once Donatello had stepped back, giving a tug at the cuffs still circling his body. There were the usual ankle and wrist cuffs he'd experienced before as a prisoner, but the ones around his biceps and thighs were new, as was the belt around his waist. He looked to Donatello for guidance as he gave the belt a tug, finding it quite tight. "Sorry, but since we have to charge the collar after every discharge, those stay on so we can secure you if needed."

     "Look, Don..." Leo paused, swinging his weak legs over the edge of the bed as he stared down at the floor. "I know you're trying to help me, but this...this is crossing the line. I'm not an animal." He raised his head to meet Don's gaze, his brother staring down at him. "Please, let me out of these. I promise you they're not necessary." Donatello was silent for a moment, tension hanging between them in the air while Leonardo waited for him to see reason. His brother finally sighed and slumped his shoulders, digging his hands into the pockets on his lab coat.

     "I will, but only if Raphael and Michelangelo give me the okay. It has to be unanimous between the three of us, okay?" Leonardo swallowed and nodded. It was only fair that it be a family decision, even though he felt he'd long since atoned for his sins. "Would you like us to vote right now?" He nodded hastily, Don extending a hand to help him up off the bed. His legs ached and creaked from lack of substantial use and the prior shock, and it took him great difficulty to keep pace with Donatello out to the living room. As he stepped out into the lair for the first time in weeks, it felt like he had returned to a home he'd left behind, memories flooding back as stimuli crowded his senses. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, basking in the warm glow and love of the home, its many familiar smells filling his nostrils. "Leonardo? We're ready." He snapped to attention, his brothers sitting in a semi-circle in front of him. Donatello had pulled out the dining room chairs for this impromptu meeting, Leonardo feeling starkly naked as his clothed brothers stared back at him. Michelangelo was balancing his chair on its rear legs while tropical patterned shirts and shorts hung from his limber form, Raphael leaning over the back of the reversed chair in his mechanic jumpsuit, a toolbox at his feet. Donatello sat between the two on his own chair, legs crossed while he stared Leonardo down. "Let's begin." Donatello laid out a tape recorder, clicking the record button down, surprising Leonardo at the formality of the proceedings. "Leonardo, following your agreement to seek my assistance with therapy and treatment for your hallucinations, Raphael, Michelangelo and myself all agreed that we would take mutual interest in your recovery, and that we would mutually decide on courses of treatment, discipline, and judgement of recovery progress."

     Michelangelo interjected, wobbling on his chair. "Basically, we all want to make sure you're okay, bro. We all want to feel safe, but more importantly, we want you better. Like you said, you need all three of us to keep you honest, and you being our leader and all, we're going to follow that order." Leonardo felt less like a leader and more like a prisoner as his family spoke, even though he knew they were right in what they said, in what he'd agreed to that night. He turned to Raphael, who remained silent throughout. "Don't sweat it too much, bro. It feels weird, but before you know it, it'll be back to normal. Y'know?" Mikey smiled at him with that goofy, impish grin of his, Leonardo's guard melting a little at it. He was right, he would get better, and he would get back to normal.

     "Here's how this works. I fully believe that the patient should dictate their recovery process, which is why I'll let you call a meeting like this up to once a week. We'll vote on your request, and if unanimous, it will be granted immediately. If one of us disagrees, it's denied." Donatello was firm and clear, Leo nodding his head in understanding. "Good. In that case, tell us what you want, and why you believe you've earned it. The floor is yours, Leonardo."

     "Thanks, uhm, Don. Look, I've had a lot of time to think, and...I know I screwed up. I committed an inexcusable act, an act for which I sought treatment by all three of you. I won't lie, I'm still hallucinating, and sometimes they're quite vivid. However, I also believe that I won't act on them again. I've accepted them, and I'm working to dispel them from my mind, but this current treatment is..." Leonardo paused, all three of his siblings staring intently at him, their faces expressionless. "Guys, I'm not a prisoner...am I? I mean, I agreed to treatment, but this isn't how voluntary committals work. You don't get to tie me down for weeks at a time, place me in a shock collar, paralyze me in bed, and then let me out in cuffs. That's a prisoner, and I'm...I'm your brother!" He clutched his chest as he raised his voice inadvertently, hastily recoiling back to avoid tripping the collar. "I...I'm sorry, truly sorry for what I've done. I am. I also believe I served an appropriate time in confinement for my misdeeds, and that further confinement and restraint like this is inhumane. I propose my immediate release from these bonds, pending my continued commitment to treatment." There was silence in the room aside from the whirring of the tape recorder, Donatello motioning with one hand for Leo to continue. "I, uhm, that is all. I yield the floor." He stood there in silence while his brothers thought on his words, Donatello breaking the tension after a few moments.

     "Alright, let's vote. Who here objects to Leonardo's request for immediate release?" Leo bit his lip as he watched his family in fearful silence, Michelangelo raising his hand first. Leonardo wasn't too surprised, but he was still hurt by the lingering distrust, even as Mikey's normal smile faded into melancholy and sympathy.

     "I'm sorry Leo. You're still talkin' to invisible people, though, and that's...that's creepy." Michelangelo sighed. "I object."

     "I object as well." Donatello raised his hand, the remote dangling in his palm. "You still need help, Leonardo. I will make sure you get that help. Until then, I cannot sign off on your release." The vote had already been decided by Mikey's objection, but Raphael had been quiet the entire time. Leo turned his gaze to his larger brother, nostrils flaring as he sought any sort of response from Raphael, even a glimmer of forgiveness. His hope turned to anguish as Raphael's hand slowly went up as well, his knees giving out from under him as he crumpled to the floor. "The vote is decided. None in favor, all against. The next meeting may be called no sooner than a week from now, on March 8th." Leo choked back a sob as Donatello turned off the recorder, the depths of his failure truly, finally weighing on his shoulders.


	8. Therapy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leonardo begins treatment with Don, though it's not quite what he was expecting...

     Life had returned to a degree of normalcy since the vote a few days ago. Leo had jumped right back into a routine of thrice daily meditation, medication at breakfast and dinner, and weight lifting once his brothers had vacated the gym. His musculature ached from being renewed and rebuilt so suddenly, and today, day four, was his rest day, the day needed for the muscle fibers to actually rebuild. He'd grown accustomed to the bindings secured around his body, even if he disliked their presence, and his brothers had largely treated him as if nothing was wrong. He'd even attempted to escape the bindings at least once, but found their removal impossible without physical damage: the cuffs on his thighs and biceps sat above the widest part of the muscle, making them impossible to slide down, while those on his wrists and ankles were far too tight to even hope to slip off over his hands or feet. Even the collar used some sort of security screw Leo had never seen before, and he had no doubt Donatello kept its accompanying removal tool under lock and key.

     As he dressed the bed in his room with clean linens, he had to admit it was easier to accept their presence when he knew they couldn't be removed by his hand alone. He had to win over his family's trust once again, and only then would he be free of the bindings around his body. "Leo, it's time for your therapy." Donatello called from his bedroom door, Leonardo dropping what he was doing immediately and following his brother down to the infirmary. He said nothing as they walked together, taking his place on the examination table with a soft grunt while Donatello suited up with disposable gloves and a lab coat, leaving the door open for all to see. Donatello had insisted on an exam every day before lunch, and Leo learned on the first day not to argue or protest after Don triggered the manual release of his collar. His brother watched the vitals from his shell tracker on a nearby monitor while his fingers probed Leo's mouth and genital slit, checking them both for contraband as part of a search. "Good, I'm glad you're complying with the rules." Donatello removed his fingers as hastily as they entered, turning back to the cart for some lube as Leo pulled himself up atop the table in full, laying on his stomach and pulling his knees under his plastron, his exposed ass high in the air. Donatello let out a surprised churr of approval at the positioning, warm lube dabbing against his anus prior to Don's insertion. "Very good, you're demonstrating your willingness to comply with rules and norms. This is healthy behavior, Leo, even if it doesn't seem like it." Leonardo shuddered and bit his lip as Donatello's thick finger shoved inside of him, twirling around his cavity in a fruitless search for tools or keys or the like. He resisted the urge to adjust his positioning so Don would tap a newly discovered pleasurable spot within him, still embarrassed at the thought of sharing how he really felt about the thick invader. The exam ended as quickly as it began, Don snapping the gloves off into the trash. "Alright, another successful pass. Very good, Leonardo."

     "Thanks Don." He blushed as he pulled himself upright once again, sitting on the metal table with a frustrated grunt. "I'm really trying, here. That vote was a wakeup call." The lube on his anus made it slippery under his rear, though he always cleaned it up after therapy finished for the day.  Donatello took his seat on the stool and fired up the tape recorder, Leonardo adjusting himself on the tabletop.

     "Therapy session with Leonardo, March 5th." Don set the recorder down between them on a mobile cart, leaning forward with a grin. "How are you doing, Leo?"

     "I'm doing well. I've been keeping busy and sticking to a schedule, like you asked." Donatello nodded. "I'm still having occasional hallucinations, at least I think I am."

     "Could you elaborate?" Donatello pulled a notepad from his coat and clicked a pen open, scribbling notes down as Leo spoke.

     "It's weird. I think I'm having two, now. One of them is clear, vivid, and I know for a fact it's not real. It's the one that bothered me since the injury, but he's clear in image only. Actually..." He paused, hesitating a bit. "I'm pretty sure I'm just imagining him. He's not there unless I want him to be, and is gone the second I'm distracted or no longer picture him. He doesn't advocate action or opinion anymore, just discussion, like I'm talking to myself." Donatello scribbled notes down as fast as his fingers permitted, Leonardo working through the mental puzzle aloud in the safe space Donatello provided. "The other one, though? That's...he's different. He's always shrouded by the shadows, never in full focus, yet I can feel his touch on my skin, his breath in my ear. He seems as real as life itself, right down to that pervasive musk of his." Donatello paused in mid-stroke, slowly looking up at him. "Yeah, and he's the one who advocates action. It's discomforting, to say the least."

     Donatello chewed on the tip of the pen in concerned thought, lowering it down to point at Leo. "What does this other one say? I mean, you said he's as clear as life itself, right? Has he said anything to you?"

     Leonardo blushed and adjusted himself on the exam table once again, his ass slippery against the metal still. "The opposite of before. It's so damn confusing, Don, but he says I..." He stopped, biting his lip in frustration. No, Don doesn't need to know this, not yet. "I...I hate to refuse, Don, but uh...I'd like to talk to Raph about it first." Donatello brightened at the refusal, that warm smile of reassurance across his face.

     "That's fine, if he wishes to speak with you. Has he said anything to you since your conditional release?" Leonardo shook his head, eyes down at the floor while his fingers fidgeted in his lap. "I see, so he's still angry then. That may take some time, Leo...are you sure you don't want to speak to me about it? It might help swing my vote." Leonardo bristled at the blatant trap Donatello had set, refusing to trigger it so carelessly.

     "No, it's fine. I need a unanimous decision after all, remember?" Donatello's smile beamed almost falsely at him as he nodded, closing the notebook and setting it aside.

     "Fair enough. I'm glad you're taking this so seriously, Leo. You've adapted well to your conditional release, have been open and forthcoming about your problems, and have followed your regimen fastidiously." Leonardo straightened himself upright while Don spoke, hopeful for some sort of relief. His brother rose from the chair and clasped his shoulders firmly, that smile so close to his lips he could kiss him. "Keep it up."

     Leonardo shuddered as the grip was released and Donatello shut off the recorder, his brother moving to the door. Donatello said nothing as he departed, leaving him to clean up his body and the table before heading back to his daily chores, a handful of alcohol wipes making quick work of both. Leo paused as he finished cleaning everything up and glanced toward the notebook Donatello had left behind, curiosity scratching at his chest and demanding a peek. "Go on, see what he thinks of you." His hallucination taunted from the sink and cabinets of medical supplies nearby, Leo's fingers shakily reaching out toward it like it was a bomb. He gripped the thick pad and began lifting it to his eyes, some larger words with repeated underlines catching his eyes. Submissive. Progress. Compliant.

     "Leo?" He spun on the balls of his feet to face Donatello again, his brother plucking the notepad from his grasp with a smile. "Ah, thank you for cleaning up after yourself." Leonardo's heart raced as he stared into Donatello's brown eyes, a breath hitching in his threat. "Keep up the good work." His brother reached around him to pocket the recorder as well, exiting the infirmary once more without another word, leaving him confused. What sort of progress had he made, anyway? Why was Donatello using that sort of language?

     His confusion remained throughout the day as he did chores around the lair, even going so far as to assist Michelangelo with cooking prep, that manual collar override dangling from his brother's neck as a warning while Leo wielded knives and sharp instruments. Raphael had been avoiding him since the vote earlier in the week, only showing up at meals and never speaking directly to Leo. As Michelangelo fired up the griddler for chicken and Leonardo set the dinner table for three, his mind kept running through the strange turn of events as of late. What had started off innocently enough - traumatic injury, hallucinations, abducting Raphael, confessing to his family - had taken a sudden and worrying turn following his penance in the infirmary cell. Even the progress he'd made with Raphael seemed to vanish in thin air following his release back into the lair and their family, and the bonds, while comfortable, only served to reinforce his position beneath his siblings, not alongside them. Perhaps most worryingly of all, that last part didn't bother him in the slightest. "Hey bro, you forgot your plate." Michelangelo's voice snapped him back into the moment, his glance shifting quickly between his brother and the set dinner table.

     "No, I set out three spots." Michelangelo smiled, plating the hot food. "Is Raphael joining us?" Michelangelo nodded, causing Leo to scramble for a fourth place setting before Donatello's grip squeezed on his arm. "Don! Sorry, I forgot the fourth-"

     "It's no worry, you did perfectly. I actually wanted to try something, and this is perfect timing." Leonardo froze as Donatello moved deeper into the kitchen, tapping Michelangelo's shoulder twice, their smaller brother nodding knowingly. "Leo, take over for Michelangelo here while he and I talk. Please call us when dinner is on the table." Leonardo nodded and reached for the fourth place setting he had hurriedly pulled out of the cupboard, Don's firm hand giving him another squeeze. "I said it's fine. Plate your food, but do not set a fourth place at the table." He nodded as he swallowed hard at the order, that familiar bite of the collar against his skin tightening as the lump in his throat slid downward. Donatello and Michelangelo went off toward Don's lab while he plated the food, Raphael making his presence known with a loud scrape of his chair almost as soon as they were gone, causing Leo to jump a bit in surprise.

     "R-Raph! H-hey." He tried to act casual, even as his brother remained silent and distant. He slipped Raphael's plate down in front of him, the hot scent of chicken and steamed greens filling the air of the lair. "I haven't seen you much lately." Raphael didn't respond, instead looking down at his plate with an intense sadness. Leo moved back to plating Don and Mikey's dinner next, the silence between them endless and thick. Something was bothering his brother, something deep, and Leo wished he could pull it from him and see that smile of his again. He was about to open his mouth to speak again but decided against it, setting down Don and Mike's plates on the table before spooning up his own, remembering Donatello's words about not setting his place at the table, the puzzle clicking into place in his mind. "Oh..." He murmured to himself aloud, realizing Raph probably didn't want to eat with him quite so soon, not until he had a clean bill of health from Don. It was likely in his best interest to just keep quiet, and do as Don or Mike told him, to prove to Raphael that he was better. He took a dip into the fridge behind Raphael for beer and soda, his heart fluttering at his proximity to his larger, stronger sibling, even as he placed Raph's favorite out in front of him before setting Mikey and Don's drinks out. "Dinner is set!"

     Don and Mikey emerged quickly and flanked Raphael at the table, everyone clad in their gym outfits with the notable exception of Leonardo, everyone staring at him with different expressions. Michelangelo was grinning positively deviously while Donatello had an expression of clinical firmness, Raphael looking increasingly suffocated between the two. "Good work, Leo. Now then, let's dig in." Everyone but Raphael dig into their meal with fervor, Leonardo moving over toward his plate left on the counter. "Where are you going, Leo?"

     He paused, glancing over at Donatello. "To get my dinner. Why?" Donatello made a motion for Leo to move back where he was, chewing on his lip as he hesitated. "Did I do something wrong?" Donatello shook his head and motioned him again, Leo obeying and shuffling back to the empty spot at the table, standing behind his chair as his family ate.

     "Very good. We just want Raphael to adjust to being around you again." Raphael scoffed as Donatello spoke, yet quickly retreated as Michelangelo shot him a glare. "Once he's finished, you're free to eat." Leonardo swallowed again as the delicious scent filled his nostrils, Raphael refusing to touch his plate even as Donatello's pace slowed down, his glare joining Michelangelo's. "Eat, Raphael." Raphael shuddered at the intonation of the words, Leo feeling increasingly rotten for starting this whole mess. He watched Raphael slowly comply and shovel some food into his mouth, Leonardo standing still as they all consumed their hot meals even as his grew colder on the counter. "See? Leo's not a threat. We're all fine. Mikey, you're fine?" Michelangelo gave a nod, looking Leo up and down before doing so. "See? We're fine. Just some adjusting, is all. Are you fine, Leo?" He gave a hasty nod to Donatello, forcing a weak smile. "You sure? Be honest, now." He glanced around the table yet again, Michelangelo and Donatello staring intently at him, while Raphael's look of defeat stared longingly at him.

     "Yes." His voice was weak, the answer not entirely true, but not entirely false. If his family was fine, he was fine, that's all that ever mattered to him. Nobody responded to his whispered response, only resuming their meals at their own leisure, with Mike and Don discussing topics about work in the lair, the two of them occasionally exchanging a glance in his direction. Raphael stood up sharply from the table and grabbed his plate, half the food still on its surface.

     "Leo will get that for you, Raphael. Sit." Don's voice was firm and commanding, Raphael dropping the plate on the table before storming off toward his bedroom, Donatello looking over his shoulder at him with a sigh. "Don't mind him, Leo, he's just in a mood. You know him." Leo didn't respond, couldn't respond as Raphael stormed off. He honestly couldn't get a good read off of anyone in his family at the moment, everyone sending mixed signals to him. Could he be that bad at reading his own brothers? Could he have permanently broken their bonds with his actions? "Leo, be a good brother and clean up the dinner table?" Don's sweet voice masked the demand, though Leonardo complied obediently as he knew what defiance would earn him. It wasn't out of the ordinary to help clean up after dinner, though he'd never been ordered to do so before, and it was something that perturbed him. Michelangelo watched with amusement as he cleared Raphael's place and dumped the food in the trash, starting in on dishes even as his own full plate stared at him. He said nothing as he cleaned up, Michelangelo and Donatello eventually parting ways without much acknowledgement in his direction other than praise for his good work. By the time everything else had been cleaned and set to dry, his food was as cold as his heart, its love for his family sapped of its rich warmth.


	9. Progress

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leonardo has made progress after his first week of therapy. Of course, what sort of progress he's made is entirely dependent on whose perspective it's viewed from...

     "That concludes the vote for today, March 8th. Unanimously opposed to release." Donatello clicked off the recorder as Leonardo sighed, Michelangelo jumping up to give him a hug, followed by Donatello. "We love you, Leo, you know that. Chin up, alright? You're making progress, I promise." Leonardo didn't fully buy that line, especially as Raphael sulked off to his room, an increasingly pained expression on his face. He hadn't had a proper hallucination in days, at least not while he was awake and released. He never mentioned the figure creeping in on him while he was secured to the cot in the infirmary cell, its hot breath on his stomach as it dragged that warm, slick tongue over his slit, Leonardo helpless to resist its teasing touch while his collar was recharging, per Don's orders. He never told Don how real and delightful it felt, simply chalking it up to an intense dream as his mind reconciled desires and feelings, especially that desire for more. Come to think of it, there was a lot he never told Don, which is likely why he still hadn't won over a single vote yet. "You coming?" He glanced at Donatello, his brother leaning expectantly out of the infirmary with his notepad in hand. "Come on, let's go. Therapy time and spot check." Michelangelo had trotted off to play video games, while Raphael stared down at him from the balcony above, their gaze locked and following the other as Leo made his way to the infirmary, his brother turning away and heading out of sight just as he followed Don inside. His heart skipped a beat as he saw some added restraints to the underside of the surgical table, clearly designed to latch onto his cuffs and straps still locked around his body. "Hop on up, and get on your hands and knees for me, okay?"

     "Uhm, what's with the straps? I've been following your every order, Don, I don't think those are necessary." His olive skinned brother smiled at him and squeezed his cheeks, pressing their foreheads together. It was something Don had learned of him only yesterday, but the involuntary churr Leo elicited served to calm and relax him in his brother's grasp.

     "I know it's scary, Leo, but you need to trust me. Do you trust me?" Leo nodded as he churred, Donatello rewarding the concession with a firm kiss between his eyes. "Good boy. Up on the table." His heart skipped again at the condescending tone and words, but knew better than to protest any further. He clambered atop the metal table and assumed the position Don instructed, his brother quickly securing the bindings to his ankle cuffs before moving to his wrists, the straps allowing a little leeway while forcing him to hold the position. He heard the snapping of gloves as Donatello prepped for the spot check, those hands sliding over his bare body and checking under each cuff for contraband with slow and delicate precision, his brother taking more time than normal in working his way up toward Leo's face. All he could see was Don's crotch as his brother forced those fingers past his lips and inspected inside his mouth, a choked groan in his throat as Donatello roughly checked every tooth and crevice within, even probing his cheeks and tonsils. He'd never had much of a gag reflex to begin with thanks to their ninja training growing up, but in the span of a week, Don had all but eliminated the last vestiges of it in his quest for unfettered access. "Very good, no choking, no contraband." He heard his brother speak above him, Donatello patting his cheeks as he retreated. "I'm very proud of you Leonardo. Such progress in a week is to be commended." The praise made him churr a little even as he knew what came next, the snap of a lube bottle accompanied by the soft whistle of air through its opening, though the steady drizzle down the valley between his buttocks was new and pleasant. Don entered without warning, the slick digit penetrating with surprising ease and eliciting a forced groan from him in the process, squirming a little as it probed inside his depths. The groan became significantly louder and more pronounced when a second digit joined it inside of him, his hips instinctively rocking back against the twin invaders. "Oh, did I hurt you?" The voice lacked empathy, but dropped lewdness as the fingers wiggled for good measure. Leonardo could only shake his head and gasp as they searched inside of him, a hot blush on his cheeks as he felt his erection drop from his slit into full view. "That's a no. You're enjoying this, Leonardo?" He gave a quivering nod, Donatello responding by slowly withdrawing the fingers to their tips, then thrusting them back down to their base, a lustful howl rushing past his lips while he rocked back against them. "Interesting." Donatello's voice was clinical in its exclamation, Leonardo's carnal instincts surging forth inside his chest, demanding more. His brother was less interested than himself, however, Donatello withdrawing his fingers entirely and removing the gloves with another audible snap, Leonardo unable to stop himself from whimpering and pushing his slick entrance back in the air, begging for more. Don washed his hands out of sight before the screech of his wheelie stool echoed in the room, his brother sliding into view with that recorder and notepad in hand. "Let's begin with therapy." A click and whir accompanied the start of the recording, Don clicking open a pen from his coat pocket. "Donatello, therapy with Leonardo, March 8th." He looked up at Leo with a grin, tapping the pen to his chin. "How are you doing?"

     Leonardo ceased his groans and churrs, composing himself even as his erection throbbed beneath him in plain sight of Donatello. "I'm...I'm good. I'm pent up, I'm feeling these conflicting feelings of need. It's all very new to me." Donatello nodded as he scribbled down some notes on paper, Leo squirming a bit in the bonds.

     "What sort of feelings? Are they good? Bad?" Don lead with his tone, encouraging him to be open and transparent about the topic, even though he knew damn well that Don didn't need explanation about his feelings right now, especially following the humiliating exercise just a moment ago.

     "It's lust. It's that same lust I felt for Raphael that night, but different." He panted as he struggled in the straps again, desperate to touch his aching length, to jerk off right there. "It's...it's hard to explain. I just feel so damn needy, Don." His brother remained flat as he continued taking down notes, only giving him an occasional glance.

     "Interesting. How often did you masturbate before the injury? Or your commitment to my care?" The question seemed clinical on the surface to him, but Leo's raging hormones made clear thought difficult, especially as his slick entrance contracted and relaxed as if gasping for air, craving contact once again.

     "N-not often." He felt a shudder run through his nerves. "I turned to meditation, I suppressed it whenever I could." Donatello gave him a look of annoyed disbelief, Leo whimpering as he divulged the number. "Maybe once or twice a month, when it got bad." Don's expression turned to curious amusement at the admission, which in turn made him blush even harder atop the table. His erection still throbbed with need between his legs in spite of the lack of attention paid toward it, causing him to shift atop the table once again.

     "I see. And since your release, how often have you pleasured yourself?" Donatello's questions continued to poke and pierce his armor, the growing embarrassment mixing with his heightened arousal. He whimpered audibly, as if being forced to divulge a painful secret.

     "I haven't! That's why I'm so damn pent up." Donatello scribbled down some words before closing the notebook, setting it on the counter behind him before standing up in front of Leo once again, his brother's hands stroking his scalp and head gently.

     "Good. That was very good of you to be honest with me, Leo, even if it's embarrassing." He cooed and hushed quietly as Leo squirmed and struggled against the straps holding him in place. "I'm going to refer your care to Michelangelo, now." He froze as Don spoke, cock twitching at the mention of his younger brother getting involved, Donatello not missing the sudden tension in his muscles and responding with more soothing tones. "It's alright, he's been eager to work with you on this. It's clear you have some unmet sexual needs, and he'll afford you the utmost privacy, I promise." Leonardo nodded in Don's grasp quite meekly, craning his head to look up at Don and away from his crotch, Donatello quickly pushing his head back down. "Careful now, don't hurt yourself, just relax in the restraints."

     "W-what do you mean by care, though? Are you saying I'm doing better?" He could see Donatello's arms shrug, but had no context as to the emotion shown. "I just want to go back to normal, Don. I want all of us to go back to how things were." He choked back a whimper as Donatello cradled his head in his hands, rubbing his cheeks against those browned fingers like a pet against its owner.

     "You know as well as anyone you can never go back, only push forward." Donatello cooed quietly, Leonardo nodding again. "So let's keep moving forward. I'm going to let you calm down here for a little while, and inform Michelangelo of the new routine." Don's hands withdrew from Leo's head as his brother moved out of sight, his touch still felt along the ridge of his shell. "You'll see me daily for a random inspection and therapy session, while Michelangelo will take care of your education and training in the afternoon." Those fingers flirted away from his shell just before reaching his ass, making him moan in desire.

     "T-training? What do you mean?" His voice sounded husked, yet relaxed as he heard Donatello release the lock on the infirmary door, his brother pausing for a moment.

     "Sex is like any other skill, Leo, in that it needs to be taught and trained. Michelangelo is an excellent teacher, you'll see." His heart fluttered at the common sense tone Donatello carried in his words, more than a little flustered at bringing more of his family into this mess with him. He was about to protest until he heard the door close, leaving him naked and needy on the operating table, those straps ensuring he had no other choice but to wait out the arousal.

     His mental projection stared at him from the cabinets, legs dangling from the edge of the countertop. "Look at you." Leonardo winced as the double stood up, striding toward his face until his crotch was level with Leo's agape mouth. "Such a slut. You practically begged your brother for sex."  Leonardo shook his head angrily, his erection slowly softening. "Sure you did. What sort of training do you think they'll do, huh? You've spent so much time tied down, restrained, probed and prodded..." His double bent down with a devious grin on his face, eyes wide with perverse glee. "You're loving it all. Admit it."

     "I do...s-so what?" Leo's voice shook as he whispered to the projection, who leaned closer still.

     "So what? You enjoy being kept like a toy, that's what. You didn't envy the men abusing Raph that night..." The double trailed off, his perfectly white teeth glinting from non-existent light as Leonardo connected the dots.

     He swallowed hard. He was right. He didn't envy the position of the men taking advantage of Raphael. "I envied Raphael being abused like that." The admission of guilt was a husked whisper, as quiet as he could manage speech. His double acknowledged him with a nod, slowly standing back upright and walking backwards toward the cabinets again. He pointed down to the tape recorder positioned beneath Leo's chin, the tape still spinning inside, his candid admission recorded permanently. His heart felt like a block of ice as he began to panic, the mental image fading into the brick wall behind the cabinetry.    

     "I'm glad we finally came to our senses." Leonardo watched as the doppelganger faded into the bricks, his ethereal visage no longer necessary under the blinding light of truth.


	10. Training

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leonardo learns a lot from Michelangelo.

      "Hmmm..." Michelangelo circled him in thought, Leo keeping his arms at his sides and chest forward as he was inspected by their youngest brother. "You sure he's ready, Don?" Leo didn't dare move from his spot as Mikey called out to Don, their olive-skinned brother sitting casually behind him, blocking the doorway. "He still seems...lean, undisciplined." He stifled a snort, as Michelangelo was the last one to mention discipline, the word itself so humorously out of character that he wanted to laugh.

      "He's fine, Mikey. I'll still do my inspection of him at a random interval during the day, and you'll handle his training on your schedule in the afternoon." His silent laughter turned to anxiety once again, 'training' being tossed around like this was on par with their martial arts katas, or exercise regimen. Don had told him that sex was a skill that needed to be honed, practiced, defined for him, but even so, it felt somewhat off in his heart to hear it referred to in such blunt terms.

      "He needs more muscle on him, but...I can work with this. I'll take over his medications, if you don't mind." Michelangelo traced a finger up his plastron, making him shudder against the thick digit. "And how do you feel about this, Leo?" He swallowed at the direct address, throat bulging as he forced his anxiety down. "I heard that snort. You don't think I can be a good teacher?"

      "I-it's not that, Mikey." Their younger brother wagged a finger in his face, tsking aloud. "Sorry, Michelangelo. I meant that I'm still unsure of myself in all this. I just think I should win over Raph, err, Raphael before we go down this road." Michelangelo's blue eyes drilled into his own, making Leo uncomfortable. There was a fiery determination within them, something he'd only seen when Mikey really, really wanted something. To see that fierce look staring him down was simultaneously disquieting and arousing, the subtle scent of pheromones clouding his nostrils.  The gaze broke after what felt like minutes, Michelangelo stepping around his right and smacking his bare ass.

      "I'll handle him, Don." He heard Don's chair creak to the side followed by their brother's exit, Michelangelo's fingers drumming up the centerline of his shell toward his neck, curling around the collar secured there. "Don already shared with me that little confession of yours, bro, so let's lay things out in the open. Do you want to learn how to properly have sex?" Leonardo nodded softly, his erection swelling within his genital slit as their solace and mutual arousal began clouding his senses as well as his judgement. "You said you wanted to be used, didn't you?" He nodded again, a tug at the collar on his neck testing his balance. "Tell me what you want from this, Leo."

      "To learn." He paused at the end of the statement, the grip on his neck strap tightening as if expecting more. "To learn how to have sex. To learn to...to learn to be like Raphael was that night. To learn why he enjoyed, why I enjoyed it."  The grip loosened almost immediately, Michelangelo taking a step back with a cheshire grin on his face. His little brother stalked out of view and made noises of glassware and plastic bottles, giving something a firm shake to check its contents. He resisted the urge to look and peek, and was rewarded soon thereafter with a tumbler full of water and a small, blue pill, Michelangelo offering them out expectantly. He grabbed them both without a word, tossing back the pill with a heavy gulp before washing it down with the water offered, shocked by the bitter and slick taste of the contents. "What is that?!"

      "Your medicine. Drink it all, now, as that's just the first dose. They get bigger from here on out." Michelangelo's response hid an ulterior motive, though Leo was in no position to figure it out as he swallowed the rest of the glass with several throaty gulps. The liquid was slick and bitter, leaving his mouth as slippery as ice in the process. His little brother stood up on his toes and jammed a finger inside Leo's mouth as he lowered the glass, swirling them around inside with a widening grin. "Dude, beautiful. The medication is going to work wonders for you, I can tell."

      "That was disgusting, Michelangelo." Leo made an audible noise of disgust, the heavy liquid settling in his stomach atop the acid within, sitting heavy like a large meal. His brother didn't seem too perturbed, however, and simply took the glass back and set it out of view once again. It wasn't long before he returned, a swift flick of his wrist clipping a leash to his collar and giving it a tug. The silent direction made him blush as he followed the leash around in a circle without a word, his gaze locked on Michelangelo's happily excited face while he was led around. They stopped short of Michelangelo's bed, a shoebox sitting on the edge, its purpose clear even to Leo's muddled mind. Michelangelo held the leash tight as he faced Leo and snapped his fingers, pointing down at the floor. He slowly sank to his knees as instructed, not wanting to anger or worry Michelangelo into using the remote hanging from his neck against him. A second snap of the fingers accompanied the same pointing motion, a sharp yank on the leash adding to the corrective action and making him realize he was to be down on all fours, his palms flattening out against the cool pavement as he assumed the same inspection position Donatello demanded of him.

      "Good boy." He bristled at the derogatory compliment, a mixture of pleasure and frustration accompanying a slight shudder of his upper body. The leash changed direction toward the bed as Michelangelo sat down, the creak of bedsprings mingling with the shuffle of cardboard as Michelangelo opened the shoebox. He turned his head to look upward, curiosity finally getting the better of him just as Michelangelo propped his feet up atop his shell, forcing Leo's focus on maintaining stability and balance. "While I plan, I want you to tell me when you're so ready to begin that you just can't stand it anymore." Leonardo grunted in both affirmation and frustration at his younger brother, adjusting his palms against the floor and spreading his stance, a heat burbling in his gut and slowly spreading outward along his skin. Silence spread outward between them as Leo focused on being as still as possible, even as arousal marched through his blood and into his hidden length, minutes ticking by as his urgent need became more pronounced. His cock finally slipped free into the open air as his tongue licked along the backs of his slick teeth with hunger, Michelangelo's careful shift atop his shell the only sign his brother was still paying attention. A soft slurping and squirking noise rang in his ears as Michelangelo began working with something wet between his fingers, though Leo didn't dare look for himself and risk losing his pose in the process. "Well? Are you ready?" He gave a hasty nod, his cock practically throbbing with need in the cool air of the bedroom, Michelangelo's feet leaving his shell and planting firmly on the floor, a slick hand grabbing at his ass and pressing against his rear entrance, far more sensually than Don provided. "I can't hear you."

      "Y-yes Mikey~" he crooned, his brother's hand lifting from his rear before slapping back down hard, causing him to yelp at the sting. "Yes Michelangelo!" He placed more enthusiasm and respect into the response, only to be greeted with another smack on his rear, skin reddening as his younger brother tanned his hide. "YES MASTER!" He cried out after another few smacks, body shuddering as Michelangelo finally stopped. Don had warned him to show proper respect during training with Michelangelo, but he didn't expect him to take it this far. Instead he found himself almost painfully aroused at the discipline meted out against his ass, a bead of pre splattering on the floor beneath the tip of his engorged cock. Michelangelo said nothing as Leo knealt there, an audible squishing noise returning to the room followed by a loud squelch, the click of a cap ending the strange chorus.

      "Lesson one. Relax." Leo didn't have time to think before an intruder probed at his back entrance, easily spearing him apart as the slick object pushed inside of him. The first bite of pain reinforced the words of Michelangelo, Leo focusing on releasing every ounce of tension in his body beyond what was necessary to maintain his pose, even as the object continued to stretch him apart in a way he didn't think was possible. The pop of the device inside of his rectum caused him to jump and moan aloud, Michelangelo's grip on it disappearing without a word. "Good boy. Give it a push, gentle yet firm. Do not strain." Leo complied with the order, giving his muscles a firm push against the intruder and finding no success, the object staying rooted within his ass like a plug or stopper. Michelangelo churred aloud, his palm tapping the bottom of the object and making Leo moan again, its tip pressing against that sensitive spot of his ass and making his length twitch. God, it felt good, whatever it was, as did the slick fingers of his brother coiling around his shaft, stroking effortlessly along the dry skin as if covered in water. "Have you ever used lube before, boy?" Leonardo shook his head again, the thought not striking him. A painful smack of his ass made him cry out, body jilting forward and into Michelangelo's snug grasp, the painful sting combined with a lustful moan.

      "No Master!" Michelangelo's hand retreated from his ass to grip at his collar, lube-slick fingers sticking to the metal there while his other hand stroked Leo off. He struggled to resist the urge to blindly thrust into the moist opening created by those thick, calloused fingers, Michelangelo taking his dear sweet time in edging Leonardo like cattle. "I-I want to cum..." The plea was pathetic, the desperation minimal. Michelangelo undoubtedly made note of that as he continued masturbating his older brother, fearless leader turned into complicit servant, a shame Leonardo eagerly tossed aside in favor of more carnal desires. He pictured Raphael being chained to that dumpster again, that blatant abuse by those thugs turning Leo on. He wanted that so bad, and yet here was Michelangelo, seemingly eager to provide it. He wrenched his eyes shut as climax approached, a single rocking of his hips into Michelangelo's grasp causing his brother to retreat sharply, a firm spank to his bare ass reminding him of his place. He remained still there as Michelangelo patiently waited, regaining his composure and some limited willpower to force his stillness and compliance. "I'm sorry Master."

      "Why are you sorry, boy?" The question was starkly genuine, clearly not a part of their little game. Or was it a game? Why was he sorry? What did he do specifically to warrant an apology to Michelangelo? That warm hand stuck to his reddened ass cheeks and swirled against the bare skin there as Leonardo thought on the question, his shoulders sulking as he gave the only answer he knew.

      "I do not know, Master. I just know I did something wrong." There was an audible churr followed by a delicate pat of his rump, Michelangelo returning his grip to the dribbling length and giving it a firm stroke.

      "Sex is a mutual exchange of pleasure, boy." Leonardo stifled a whimper at the title yet again. "If I'm stroking you off, but not myself, then where do you think I'm deriving my own pleasure?"

      Leonardo gave it some thought, uncertainty in his voice as he volunteered an answer. "By watching my reactions, my motions." Another stroke of his cock signaled he was on the right track. "You take pleasure in prolonging my release, in that sensual, sexual torture. The moans, the gasps, the quivering." A pleased 'mmhmm' accompanied another stroke, making Leonardo's legs quiver violently, his climax nearing by Michelangelo's hand.

      "Smart boy." Michelangelo tainted him with words while pleasing him in actions, his brother's thump dancing behind the glans of his length and smearing his pre into the skin. "Do you want me to stop, boy?" Leonardo shook his head with a meek groan, hastily following it with a respectful verbal declination. "A very quick learner, too. Do you want me to tell you what I'm going to do to you?" A verbal response of acknowledgement, even as his knees rattled against the bare floor, his sphincter clenching around the intruder as he struggled to hold back his climax, like a warrior desperately holding closed a gate. "I'm going to train you to crave cock in every hole you have. I'm going to turn you into an obedient sex slave." Leonardo's heart would've sank at the blind admission of manipulation if he weren't so flushed with need, gnawing on his lower lip with a whimper. "It's clear you want it. Look at you, obeying blindly and without protest, taking a plug for the first time without a peep of pain or resistance. You want this." He groaned and rocked his hips as his orgasm neared, Michelangelo's other hand thumping the plug hard to warn him against further thrusting. "I'll even give you a choice, Leo. If you ever want to stop, if you ever want to quit going down this path...all you have to do is say so. Just say, 'Michelangelo, I want to stop.' That's it. You say this words, and I stop." His throat croaked with a husked gasp at the obvious out, Michelangelo's stroking of his cock slowing to a crawl. "I'll stop right then and there, let you go, and support your release in all future meetings. Just like that." Those fingers tickled around Leo's glans, his heightened sensitivity making the rough skin feel like a fine feather. He listened intently to Michelangelo's words, eager to escape once his desires had been filled, to swing his first vote. "But if you tell me no, Leo, if you demand I stop..." The stroking intensified with renewed vigor, a loud moan bellowing from his maw as he rapidly approached his peak. "Then that's it." The hand removed from his length swiftly and without warning, making him whimper and moan with need as he thrust carnally into the open air beneath him. "If you revoke consent, at any time, you win my vote but end your training. Permanently. I will not play with you again until you are released unanimously, understood?" Leonardo whimpered and nodded his head feverishly, desperate for Michelangelo's touch to return. His brother circled around to the front and knealt in front of him, his baby blue eyes boring through his own as a sticky, lube-covered hand cupped his chin. "Your choices are training in being a sex slave, or my vote in support of your release. In other words, I need to hear it from you directly, big brother." Their mouths were inches apart as Michelangelo angled his head upward, those thick fingers clasped around his lower jaw and squeezing firmly. "Tell me what you want, Leonardo."

      "I-I want to climax...Master." His voice was shaky, tears in his eyes as he sacrificed freedom for pleasure, independence for control. The weight of the straps secured to his body had long faded from conscious thought, their constant control having prepared him for this moment. He'd already ceded so much for his family, for their happiness, that in a perverse logic this actually made sense. He could make them all happy, and in turn, they would make him happy. All he had to do was accept this gift. "I want to be trained, M-master."

      Michelangelo said nothing, his lips pressing firmly to Leonardo's while that grip slipped to the back of his skull, his brother's tongue intruding into his still-slick mouth, licking at the medication still coating his teeth and gums. The kiss was brief, yet asserted Michelangelo'a dominance over his new role in the household, over him. No words were exchanged as that lube-coated hand grasped his cock and pumped it vigorously, his seed spilling onto the floor beneath him as a lustful moan of ecstasy filled the room like an animal being bred. The cold silence began to overshadow his afterglow as Michelangelo stood up from the floor and wiped himself clean with an orange towel, tossing it sloppily on Leo's shell before stomping off to the bedroom door and yanking it open, exposing him to the public air of the lair. "Clean yourself up and the floor, then go wash the towel. Keep that plug in until I say otherwise, understood?"

      Leonardo scrambled with the towel, every sudden movement jostling the plug in his rear. "Yes Master!" A quick scrub cleaned the floor of his spunk, the opposite side of the towel more than suitable for cleaning his cock and loins as he scurried out of the bedroom and towards the laundry, desperate not to disappoint Michelangelo so soon after his climax. He didn't notice Donatello and Raphael staring at him from the couch, Don licking his lips at the sight of the plug protruding from his ass, while Raphael fidgeted nervously beside him.


	11. Submission

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leo continues his transformation under Michelangelo's guiding hand, even as Raphael begins to show concerns.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My apologies for the delay! Ya'll are going to hate me for this, but I...kinda have two more chapters done on my phone, already, just waiting to be published. On the bright side, you get more sexy goodness after quite a long break!

     "A little wider, slave." Leonardo struggled to stretch his jaw wider apart than it already was, even as Michelangelo continued pushing the wax cylinder into his mouth. It was part of the training for proper oral sex, or so Michelangelo claimed, teaching him to stretch his jaw and prevent his teeth from biting down or touching the cock. The wax cylinder would make it clear where and when his teeth scraped, and how badly they did so, which he would then be graded on. "Good boy..." The cylinder impacted the back of his throat, Leonardo thankful that their ninjutsu training as kids involved suppressing and controlling their gag reflexes in the event of poisoning or torture; according to Michelangelo, most humans would never learn the fine control they shared over this normally-instinctual process, and it made taking these dildos and cylinders far easier for him. Michelangelo gave it another push before slowly withdrawing it, wiping it clean of saliva before examining it. Leonardo said nothing as Michelangelo did so, instead grabbing his heavy glass of medication and his routine blue pill, swallowing both as quickly as his throat allowed.

     The bitterness of the liquid was gone by now, its taste something he had begun connecting with the pleasure that would come thereafter. Michelangelo had even started serving it to him with breakfast and dinner, much to Raphael's blatant yet perplexing disgust. In fact, Raphael had only grown stranger as time passed and his training continued, constantly getting closer to him while growing progressively quieter with each advance, mixed signals of concern and fear obvious to Leonardo, their source less so. As Michelangelo had promised, the first vote after his sexual training began saw him refusing Leo's release alongside Raphael, Donatello the only one in favor thus far. Mikey's vote was to be expected, but he could've sworn he saw Don and Raph exchanging a mental argument between them through stares alone, ensuring Raphael voted no yet again. As much as he was enjoying himself, he really wanted to talk to Raph again. "Alright, you're making very good progress, slave." Michelangelo slapped his shell heartily, turning the cylinder over in front of his eyes. "See? Pristine."

     Leonardo watched as the cylinder spun, reaching up to pause it and point to some very faint scratches. "Not quite, Master. My molars are still catching it, and see how they're thin but deep?" Michelangelo gave it a closer look, raising an eye ridge in astonishment. "It means there's an imperfection with the tooth. I can't fix that, not without..." He paused, hesitant to volunteer the idea. "Not without some sort of alteration. Maybe a mouth guard?" Michelangelo rubbed his shell reassuringly, setting the wax cylinder aside.

     "Maybe. Could always just have Donnie yank your teeth, if you're that serious about perfection?" Michelangelo was only half-joking, the truth was that such long term or permanent modifications had been discussed before, but ultimately nothing had been decided or ruled out so early in. "For now, though, I would say that's a B-plus. You're almost there, you just need to adapt and adjust quicker." Their discussion was interrupted by Donatello's entry into the bedroom, a plastic bin in his hands. "Oh, you're here. Good. Slave, assume position number two." Leonardo raised up and stood in the center of the room, spreading his legs shoulder-width apart and holding his arms straight out to his sides, palms facing the ceiling. A week had been spent drilling position numbers into his head like they were katas, Michelangelo carefully adjusting each muscle and limb until he was satisfied with the perfected pose, though this was the first time he'd been genuinely ordered into this specific posture.

     "Does he know?" Donatello asked, Michelangelo shaking his head as he took the box from their taller brother and set it down on the edge of the bed. Leonardo kept his gaze forward as he'd been instructed with the pose, even as his brothers moved out of view, but not out of earshot. "You sure about this? What he has now are technically stronger."

     "Stronger, yes, but far less flexible." Michelangelo countered, the rustle of metal and materials tugging at Leo's curiosity, his skin feeling flushed as his medication began to kick in. "Slave, mouth." He parted his jaw without hesitation, that familiar taste of rubber plunging into his mouth as the leather straps were secured behind his head, the ball gag quickly being accompanied by his blue mask, tied as a blindfold. "Good boy. Stay." He felt the strap on his right arm loosen first, the medical plastic falling to the floor with a clatter before being replaced with the cool, familiar feel of leather, being wrapped twice around his bicep before being cinched tight, a strange tightness remaining as it was secured in place through an unknown method, though somehow involving the clink of metal.

     He felt another set of hands work on his left arm, undoubtedly Donatello, the strap there falling away before being replaced with a similar leather accent as well. Then came the cuffs on his wrists, open air licking at his skin for the first time in almost three months, but only until soft padding enclosed them with an unfamiliar replacement set. They moved from his arms to his legs, repeating the process with the straps and cuffs there, though not replacing the straps above his thighs with anything. "He looks pretty good, Mikey. You're sure he's ready?" Don's voice masked his own arousal quite well, though the pheromones clogging the air were unmistakable. He felt Michelangelo's hands tug at each cuff and strap in turn, testing their rigidity and security before moving to his chest, tension melting from his torso as they fell to the floor.

     "Totally. He's graduated from prisoner to trainee, at the very least." A slap of his ass jostled the thick plug within, Michelangelo having wasted no time moving up in size as he grew accustomed to each one. His brother-come-owner bragged at how quickly he stretched to accommodate the thickness, which only served to make Leo blush that much harder in response. "Slave, mouth." Leo parted his jaw just as Michelangelo removed the ball gag and blindfold, smacking his soft and slick lips with his tongue. "Slave, at ease." Michelangelo patted his ass again as he relaxed, pushing him toward a mirror. Except for his behavioral correction collar, which would only come off via a vote, his medical restraints had all been replaced with soft, shiny leather cuffs and straps, his chest bare for the first time in months. Finally able to examine them in detail, he could see the brass padlocks adorning a locking peg in every item, easy to pick for any of them, though something he'd never consider actually doing, their represented bond of trust and consent one he'd never break. "You're looking more and more like the role you desire to be, slave." Michelangelo's hands thumped the plug teasingly as he complimented him, Leo's cheeks flushed with embarrassed need. He loved how it rattled and pressed against his sensitive insides, the medication Michelangelo had been giving him serving to make its entrance easier and smoother with each passing day, albeit at the expense of some changes to his restroom habits. He posed and flexed a bit in the mirror, his gradually rebuilding muscles already straining against the leather, much to his brothers' delight. "I can loosen these as you grow, slave. What do you think?" Leonardo grinned at his reflection in the mirror.

     "I think I look pretty hot, Master. What do you think, Don?" His gaze turned to his olive skinned brother, giving his right bicep a teasing flex. He'd been eager to have real, proper intercourse after a week of studious training, but Michelangelo had cautioned him that it may be many more before he's ready for such an honor. Even so, he could tell Donatello was doing his best to hide his own arousal behind that ever-present professionalism he carried, his hands carefully placed over his own crotch and pressing down into the fabric of his shorts, the scent of arousal unmistakable. A firm smack of the plug jostled him back to attention, Michelangelo clicking his fingers twice before them back toward his palm, pressing them into the flattened palm of his opposite hand. Leonardo snapped to his knees and spread them shoulder width apart, head bowed with his hands clasping behind his back at the wrists. He remained silent and mindful of his place, even as Michelangelo stopped from view.

     "I think he'll do fine, Donnie. When will you be ready for his first examination?" There was the shuffling of straps and boxes as everything was packed up and put away, the two turtles leaving the room while he held his assigned pose on the floor, the heat of arousal tickling at his own neck and loins. Silence stretched throughout the room for what felt like an eternity, his solitary meditation interrupted by a pair of emerald feet stepping into his field of view. He knew damn well it was Raphael before him, but he resisted the urge to look up at him in the event this was a test by Michelangelo. Raphael said nothing at first, the sound of his fingers clenching into a fist and his suppressed breathing the only things Leo could pick up on. He wanted so bad to apologize to Raphael, to talk to his brother for the first time in weeks. It had been, what, two weeks now? Maybe three, since that first vote? He wanted to know why Raphael viewed him with disgust and shock, rather than love.

     "Yer kinda hot like that, y'know. Fearless leader, bound in leather and on his knees." Leo didn't respond, Michelangelo having spent all week drilling these poses and obedience into him. Unless he was ordered to answer, he was to remain quiet, with only one exception to that rule. "I just..." Raphael stammered, flustered. "I don't understand why, bro. Why ya let them manipulate ya like dis. Yer better than dat." Manipulate? No, Raphael was wrong. I mean, sure, there was coercion involved in coaxing certain behaviors, but not outright manipulation, not outright lies. He wanted this, all of it. He could leave anytime he wanted to, after all. He felt Raphael's fingers stroke at his cheeks, cupping his face tenderly. "Then again, I guess I'm no better." Raph's lips pressed against the top of his head, a firm kiss left tingling on his scalp. "I gotta go, Leo." The hands left his face, Raphael's feet disappearing from view as his brother left the room entirely, plunging him right back into silence. Minutes passed without a word or noise to be had beyond his own breathing, finally broken by the sticky squick of damp skin peeling from stone and Michelangelo's hands gripped tight around his neck.

     "Good slave, very good slave indeed. I'm proud of you for obeying like that." He could hear Michelangelo sniff the air, his grip tightening. "Was Raphael in here, slave?" Leo nodded, along with a spoken affirmative. "I see." There was an uncomfortable pause, no doubt as Michelangelo figured out his next question. "Did...he say anything about your training?"

     "He said I looked hot, but that he was disappointed that I let myself be manipulated." Michelangelo’s fingers relaxed suddenly against his flesh, Leonardo quickly volunteering another, unprompted response. “He’s wrong, though.” The grip tightened curiously around his neck and shoulders, a curious hmm from his brother-turned-trainer-turned-Master soliciting a follow-up.  “I’m not being manipulated. I want this.” He couldn’t see Michelangelo grin, though he could certainly smell a sudden burst of pheromones in the air from his baby brother, the hands patting his shoulders before retreating in full.  Michelangelo’s hands reached into Leonardo’s view, two clicks of his fingers followed by a sweeping motion toward his elbow, a condensed version of the order to follow. He dutifully rose to his feet and followed his brother in silence out of Michelangelo’s room, the plug jostling in his ass with each delicate step on the cool floor, Donatello and Raphael nowhere to be found in the lair proper. They stopped short of his own bedroom door, Michelangelo pulling a padlock from his shorts pocket and threading it through a locking latch on the outside of the door, turning back toward Leonardo with a wide grin on his face.

     "Lock it for me, slave." Leonardo hesitated, his fingers brushing over the cold steel. His room was his own sanctuary, filled with the comforts for his weary body and mind. He didn't need to ask Michelangelo his intent behind the order, knowing full well he was expected now to commit to his role in full, turning it from a training regimen into a permanent lifestyle. It was Michelangelo's demand for a show of faith, forcing him to place all of his trust in the care of his siblings, to cede control over his home life to those far more qualified to manage it. It was a large step to take so suddenly, the freedom from his medical restraints replaced with a lock on his past self, barred from interaction with it until fully released from their care and control. His nostrils flared for air while his heart raced, that hot flush of his arousal painting his cheeks with a rosy glow as he wavered. Raphael had made mention he was being manipulated, an opinion he had rebuked just moments ago, yet here he was on a precipice. If he closed that padlock, he was surrendering himself to Michelangelo and Donatello in full, ignoring Raphael's statement. Yet if he refused, Michelangelo would almost certainly clasp it anyway and punish him for disobedience in accordance with their training.

     Of course, he could also just revoke consent as they'd agreed, earning Michelangelo's vote and one step closer to freedom. He shuddered as Michelangelo's finger swept between his ass cheeks and tapped the plug firmly, the soft material pushing against his needy flesh and eliciting an involuntary moan from his lips. His hands greedily pushed the hasp closed, his rump pressing back into Michelangelo's tender touch. "Done, Master." Michelangelo cooed gently, his other hand reaching to squeeze at the front of Leonardo's neck, pinching its sides as he toyed with the plug some more, pulling it free before pushing it hard back into place and making Leonardo buckle at his knees.

     "Good slave. We'll sort out your sleeping arrangements later." Michelangelo removed his hands from Leo's body and made motion to follow again, guiding him back into his brother's room. His erection ached with need by now, though Michelangelo seemed to be oblivious to his present state of arousal. Two clicks of his fingers and the sign language for kneel set him into rapid compliance, re-assuming his earlier position on the floor without hesitation. "Yes or no answers, slave. Do you feel prepared to service a real cock with your mouth, without biting or scratching the flesh?"

     "No Master." Leonardo barked, his gaze lowered. He knew he couldn't quite yet, not with that deformed tooth. Michelangelo didn't respond to his own answer, instead immediately laying in with another question.

     "Do you feel prepared to take a cock inside of you, fully and completely, without the need to stretch or wait for your body to adjust?" Leonardo was far surer of this answer.

     "Yes Master, I am." Michelangelo paced in front of him in relative silence for a few moments, crouching down in front of him and forcing his chin upright, locking gazes.

     "You will be tested in three days’ time. If you fail that test, you will be punished. Do I make myself clear?" Leonardo nodded in the firm grasp and swallowed nervously, Michelangelo releasing him and rising to his feet. "I've taught you the basics you'll need to complete this test. You have three days to prepare as you see fit, and I suggest you do so. Once the test begins, your consent won't matter until it has been finished, and you've been punished or rewarded accordingly. Do you understand that?" Leonardo nodded again.

     "Yes Master, I do." Michelangelo chewed on his thumb with a hint of anxiety, even as his pheromones polluted Leonardo's senses. It was the first time he'd seen his brother nervous since they started this exercise, this so-called training, and it set off a red flag inside of his own mind. Yet he knew he could trust Michelangelo, and that this was all fine. It must have been something else on his mind, nothing to concern himself with unless Michelangelo wished to share.

     He watched his brother move to the bedroom door, still ignoring his aching erection. "Dismissed, slave." Pulling himself upright with a grunt, he departed Michelangelo's bedroom and instinctively headed toward his own, pausing as he realized that wasn't an option. His mind wandered to the content and premise of the test itself, Michelangelo's words hanging on the air. A pivot turned him toward the infirmary and his isolation cell there, determination to prepare for the upcoming examination the sole focus of his mind.


	12. Fury

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Raphael confronts Michelangelo, and pays the price.

     Raphael fumed in his room, clenched fists laying into a brand new punching bag and breaking it in with righteous fury. He'd seen Donatello and Michelangelo prepare for Leo's 'test' for two days straight now, his brother and leader locked in his isolation cell for 'training' in the meantime. It meant he had no easy way to see him, talk to him, or even stop him from going through with this audacious, perverse plan. If only Leo knew what was really going on, he'd be even more enraged than Raphael was at present. His fists connected hard with the bag and sent it swinging back into the wall, a guttural roar erupting from his throat as he rushed to pin it there and slam blindly into it over and over again.  " **YOU GODDAMN SON OF A BITCH!** "

     "Tut tut, Raphie. Such language." Michelangelo sing-songed from the doorway, a deviant grin on his face. "What's got you so riled up, hmm?" Raphael snapped his head to glare at his younger brother, his gaze so hot with anger that he had a slight concern he may actually set his brother aflame through looks alone. "Ahh, that. You don't need to say any more, your disapproval is well noted."

     "No, I don't think it fucking is, Mikey. I don't think you fucking **GET IT**." He released the bag and stormed over to the smaller turtle, fists clenched at his sides. "He has done **NUTHIN** but sacrifice for us **TIME** and **TIME** **AGAIN** , and yet here you two are, about to throw it all away! All of his effort! All of **OUR** effort!" Michelangelo remained steadfast, not even wincing even as Raphael snarled mere centimeters from his face. He opted for the low blow in the face of resistance. "What would Father say, huh Mikey? You two may have clipped the phone lines, cut the net, isolated our little family from the outside world, but at some point, Dad is gonna find out. Master Splinter is gonna find out what you two have done, and if I don't kill ya, you know he will." He saw a hint of hesitation from Michelangelo, before a fist flashed in his periphery and connected square with his temple, his body rag-dolling to the floor beyond his control.

     "How dare you." Michelangelo towered over him, his bare foot kicking Raphael's exposed gut. "You don't think I know that? Of course he'll be disappointed. Of course he'll disapprove. He would rather us live in this sewer in squalor, than actually do something to better the world. **YOU** would rather **ALL** **OF** **US** stay down here, living in filth and garbage! It's always been about Leo and Splinter and you, and honor, and family. Well I want more, Raph. I want to feel the daylight on my skin without looking over my shoulder for ninjas. Don wants to contribute to research and science projects all over the world. You might enjoy anonymity, but we hate it." He swung his foot again, Raphael sputtering as it connected with his ribs this time. " **WE** **HATE** **IT!** " Each word was punctuated with another kick, several beats of silence between them as Michelangelo composed himself and sighed, seeing the anger still sewn over Raph's face. "We want to actually live our lives as normal as possible, Raph." He crouched down, tracing a finger along his brother's chin as he spoke.  "I've asked him every step of the way, if this is what he wants. Every single time, he says it is. If giving him what he wants gives us all some freedom, why the fuck would you care?"  Raphael felt his nervous system begin firing on all cylinders again, the visible clench of his jaw making Michelangelo pummel his head again.  "Stay down. Be quiet. Don and I have busted our asses to get to this point, and unless you want us to turn our attentions back to you instead, I suggest you butt out."  Raphael snarled and spat at his younger brother, Michelangelo rising back upright and folding his arms over his bare chest.  "Fine. Be that way." The next kick connected with his head, blackness seizing him instantly.

     He woke up sometime later, his rage having died down considerably during his unconsciousness. Expecting to wake to his room, he instead found himself trapped in pitch darkness, the familiar scent of candle wax and incense cuing him to the fact he was in Leo's room. A quick tug at his wrists found that they had been cuffed behind his back and around one of the water mains running through Leo's space, meaning severing the pipe itself wasn't an option if he didn't want sewer workers snooping around the lair. He attempted to close his legs, but quickly found one of Don's spreader bars secured between his ankles, further limiting his movement. A swish of his tongue around his mouth found it filled with rubber, the familiar bite of leather behind his head ensuring his gag couldn't be removed. He was bound and secured, and positioned in such a way that he could do nothing to really escape, at least nothing he could immediately think of. Leo and Mikey had always been the escape artists of the four, and considering who had likely trussed him up here...

     "Now now, slave, there’s nothing you need in here until after your test.” He could hear Michelangelo's voice from the other side of the door, along with the scent of Leo's arousal. He struggled and thrashed against the pipe to make any noise he could, a yank back on his wrist cuffs signaling the incredibly short tether anchored to the floor, likely a recent install by Donatello for just such a purpose. The click of a padlock on the exterior of the door echoed in the dark room, his whimper silenced by the thick gag within his jaw.

     "Yes Master." He heard his brother's newly-submissive voice confirm the finished deed to Michelangelo, muffled noises of perverse excitement accompanied by footsteps away from the room shortly thereafter. Raphael was left alone in the dark, isolated with only his thoughts as company, or so it seemed until a dim light illuminated from a tablet nearby, the backlight within dimmed by a solid black screen. His gaze turned to the sole source of light in the darkness, a red timer suddenly occupying the lower right corner of the screen, 24:00:00 flashing steadily there. Keeping track of time in the pitch dark was difficult, but not impossible for a trained ninja like himself; hardly ten minutes had passed from the moment he woke until now, the timer still blinking annoyingly at him. The tablet suddenly grew much brighter as the remainder of its screen illuminated, security video of Leo's cell displayed on screen as the timer suddenly began counting down. He watched his leader, his brother, his...he watched him reach for a dildo and immediately suck down on it, the plug in his ass noticeable by his stance alone, even if it weren't visible. It was only now that Raphael noticed the heavy tape keeping his genital slit tight and closed, preventing any sort of erection as he watched the admittedly arousing act on screen in growing frustration.

     He could guess what the timer meant easily enough as he watched Leo practice these new skills of his, though two larger issues now occupied his every thought:

     First, how could he escape this bondage of Michelangelo's doing, something he'd never been able to do before, and second, how could he stop Leonardo from sealing his own fate?


	13. Mid-Terms

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leonardo faces his test at Michelangelo's hands.

     Three days passed in a blink for Leonardo, and it was all too quickly time for his test, as Master Michelangelo called it. For the four hours leading up to it, he'd been isolated in his cell with no food or water, taking a half dozen pills that Donatello had foisted on him as cleansers for his body and letting them run their course. He'd not seen Raphael for days, Donatello and Michelangelo remarking that he'd gone up to Northampton to speak with Splinter regarding the ongoing mental problems he'd been suffering from, and the continuing hallucinations he'd had at night after he was secured in his cot by Master Michelangelo's firm hands. It made sense, seeing as how Donatello was needed here to monitor his health, and the ongoing test prep by Master.

     His cell door creaked open tiredly with Donatello and Michelangelo blocking egress, his present Master holding multiple items in his arms. "Ready, slave?" Leonardo nodded and bowed, keeping his eyes on the items or the floor, never meeting Master's gaze directly. "Good. Here's how this works. I'm going to place a piece of equipment on you necessary for the test, and then I will ask if you wish to continue. When I am placing the final piece on, I will warn you that I am doing so, and that this is your last chance to revoke consent prior to the conclusion of the test. If you agree after that, there is no turning back. If you understand, state your desire to continue."

     "I desire to continue, Master." He could smell the arousal of all three of them in the small space, Michelangelo handing the gear to Donatello to hold and pulling out some wrist cuffs, buckling them tight and securing them with padlocks, the metal jingling softly. He followed them with another set wrapped above his biceps, also padlocked shut with the same key. Michelangelo tugged hard at them in turn, each yank testing his balance.

     "Do you wish to continue, slave?"

     "I do, Master." Michelangelo didn't acknowledge him verbally, this time retrieving more cuffs from Don's grasp, and kneeling before him on the ground. Leonardo snapped his gaze toward the ceiling as the cuffs were fastened around his ankles and thighs, different padlocks than the ones on his arms being threaded into place there. Michelangelo yanked harder on these, knowing the lower body strength they all possessed could jeopardize insecure bindings. Satisfied with his work, he stood upright again and confirmed consent once more.

     "Do you wish to continue, slave?"

     "Yes Master." Michelangelo wasted no time in retrieving some leather mitts, pulling them over his hands with hard yanks before tightening and locking them on around his wrists, just below the cuffs. They were wide enough to move his fingers freely inside, but stiff enough to prevent him from curling them more than a millimeter or so inward, essentially forcing them flat and preventing gripping anything or making a fist. He watched as Master then used yet another set of larger padlocks to leash the mitts to the wrist cuffs, ensuring they were a single assembly, likely to prevent him from slowly pushing them up over his palm and escaping. His other hand followed suit immediately thereafter, his arousal growing as he was rendered increasingly helpless. His breath began to hitch in his chest as Michelangelo's lips pressed into a thin line, their gazes catching briefly before Leonardo averted his eyes.

     "Do you still wish to continue? This is the penultimate piece for you, slave." Leonardo swallowed hard and gave a short nod, Michelangelo not moving or responding as he waited for verbal confirmation.

     "Yes Master, I wish to continue." Michelangelo finally moved again, grabbing a heavy hood from Don's grasp and unfolding it in front of him. It was thickly padded throughout, a single hole just wide enough for his beak to fit through being the only immediately noticeable feature. His vision darkened as Michelangelo tugged it down hard over his head, the world going dark and silent as it cut off his sight and sound entirely. He could feel his head being yanked around as his Master made sure the material was tight and snug, feeling Michelangelo step behind him and close a number of zippers along the back of the hood. The leather was cool and increasingly tight as it was secured on him, the bass heavy clunk of padlocks falling into place through zippers and locking pegs being felt through his scalp and skull. A final yank was felt around his neck as he felt Master's fingers cinch the neckline shut and lock it as well, those fingers moving from his neck to his right arm and extending it straight out in front of him. He felt two fingers tap against the soft inner elbow, the message taking a moment for him to decipher.

    

     ..-. .. -. .- .-.. / .. - . --

     .-.. .- ... - / -.-. .... .- -. -.-. .

     -.. --- / -.-- --- ..- / -.-. --- -. ... . -. -

    

     "Yes Master, I consent." He could barely hear his own voice, as distorted as it was, but clearly everyone else understood him just fine. Master's touch left him briefly before returning to his mouth, Leo parting his jaw wide as a ring gag was wedged behind his molars and secured into place, the straps locking to either side of his hood with padlocks of their own. With no way to speak, to withdraw, or even to escape, he was totally at the mercy of his family for whatever ends they had planned. Two sets of hands grabbed him from either side and slowly guided him out of his cell, firm taps guiding his legs and arms to bend as needed, or to indicate direction.

     He clearly hadn't been moved far, that much was for certain, before he was carefully guided up some steps and bent over onto some apparatus, padded leather pressing into his plastron and making him shudder. Gravity did all the work of encouraging his erection to drop free of his slit, even as the pairs of hands guided and moved his legs and arms around and into position. He could only feel the bass of metal impacting metal as locks and straps were secured into place, his arms spread down and slightly out along what felt like polished wood, two locks securing either end of each cuff to the anchor point there, rendering his arms completely immobile. His legs suffered similar treatment, locked at the ankles and thighs with his knees bent as if he were on all fours on the ground, the added pressure of a spreader bar clicking between his ankle and thigh cuffs to prevent additional movement. He gave a few test tugs to see what freedom was there, and quickly found none, much to his delight. The tickling of a thin cord against his shell made him gurgle around the gag, a crackle against his ears as something in his hood was...turned on? He didn't recall any electronics, but he never inspected anything that closely, either.

     "I trust you're comfortable, slave, because we're about to begin." Leonardo managed a gurgle around the gag as Michelangelo's voice filled his ears, the stimuli in his current arrangement. "Your test is simple: bring ten men to climax. Five orally, five anally." His heart skipped a beat: were there men here in the lair with the three of them? No, there's no way Don and Mike would have brought humans down here, absolutely not. Of course, he hadn't been on patrol in weeks...nor had he really had a chance to examine their entire lair as of late, or even over the past day or so. Those four hours he spent locked in here would have been plenty of time for them to smuggle in actual humans if they wanted to. "You will swallow their loads in their entirety, or you will be punished. You will not orgasm yourself, or you will be punished. You will not attempt escape, or you will be punished. Finally, you will not resist any cocks presented to you, or you will be punished." He couldn't answer Michelangelo, nor did he need to. The rules were clear, and he'd consented to this multiple times already. "You will be timed. The faster you bring them to climax, the better your grade. If you take longer than an hour to bring anyone to climax, you'll fail." He felt tape being applied to his shell as the speakers fell silent, once again isolating him from the world around. Almost immediately, two warm cocks slammed into him from both sides, one pressing through his ring gag and sliding along his tongue, while the other speared his ass open with a healthy coating of lubricant. They stayed still for a moment, hilted inside of him before slowly beginning their own pace of thrusts and glides, a moan choked up in his throat as he was blindly spit roasted.

     He focused initially on the cock plumbing his mouth, tongue sliding over its underside while the small length jostled around inside the ring. Its pace began to quicken as he moistened the flesh and teased its head, his attention distracted to his own rear as the cock back there slammed hard against his prostate, a shudder erupting through his body as pleasure gushed forth from it. He knew he couldn't take much of that before he would climax, but thankfully it was just a one off hit from his rear intruder. It wasn't long until he felt hot jets of liquid entering his anal cavity, the cock within hilted deep inside of him as it spasmed in random intervals, emptying its load. He counted one serviced customer in his head, groaning again as the cock slowly pulled free of his ass. "Do not leak, slave. Do not speak, either. Your gag will be removed shortly." He continued servicing the length still in his maw, even as it pulled free for a brief moment for the ring in his jaw to be removed.

     Surprise registered as he quickly found the straps holding it there moved forward of his beak and clipped onto something else, a yank tightening them down and forcing the cock back into his jaw, his head and neck gripped tight against the member. He immediately parted his teeth wide enough for the length to be unobstructed, and with a little more tongue work and a hot, wet environment within his maw, it wasn't long until thick ropes of fluid were coating the back of his throat. He swallowed the slightly salty, slightly sweet substance down, hungrily gobbling every drop it left behind as it erupted, stumbling only slightly as a second, larger cock shoved into his ass without warning. His mind sank to baser, more carnal instincts as he was debased and used like a fleshlight by these strange men, the constant training and mentoring by Michelangelo toward service taking the reins of his conscious thought, focused on pleasing them to climax as best he can.

     Michelangelo watched from his spot at the control board Don had setup, watching his olive skinned brother remove the dildo from Leo's mouth and toss it into a cleaning solution, quickly swapping it out with a slightly larger one on the fucking machine strapped to Leo's head. Don had outdone himself with such a rig, two sex machines attached to either end of a bondage horse, complete with piping to dispense his 'nutritional artificial semen and lubricant', or-

     "NASAL connected, he's all set for oral two." Don flashed a thumbs up from his position in front of Leo's face, the dildo sliding into their brother with ease, his jaw hungrily parting for its entry and straining just a little bit more. "How's he looking?" Michelangelo glanced at the sensor readouts Don had wired into the equipment, the fake 'orgasm' wired to go off once a certain score had been reached, a combination of friction, moisture, temperature and depth measurements from each dildo. He gave Don a thumbs up from his position, his attention more focused on the night vision camera surveilling Raphael. He watched his brother ignore the live video feed from the tablet next to him, his fingers still fumbling with the handcuffs locked around his wrists. "Mikey, don't worry about Raph."

     "Can't help it. He pissed me off, even if he had a point." He'd be lying if he said he didn't still have doubts, and that he'd been desperately hoping Leonardo would wake up and back out of it. That he'd finally realize his hallucinations stopped a while ago, that it was him stalking him at night, twisting his mind. He had confidence Leo would fight this all off. Now, as he watched the machines continue their tireless work, he wasn't so sure. "You're still sure about this, Don?" Donatello nodded.

     "Of course I am. She didn't give us much choice, after all. We can deal with Splinter later." Michelangelo' stomach twisted slightly, even as his raging erection stood proud in the air, two fingers twirling around its tip as he returned his attention to the scene ahead. He just kept telling himself that if Leo didn't want this, he would have said so.  "Mike?"

     "He's fine. Two rear is getting close to climax, a good clench should do it." Don's lips pressed into a thin line, and Michelangelo know their genius brother had seen the feint a mile away. This little agreement of theirs may not have been ideal, but as long as everyone was happy, that's what mattered. His gaze turned to Raphael's continuing struggle again, Leo's moans clearly audible over the tablet audio feed while he and Don were filtered out.

     Yeah. As long as everyone was happy, things would be fine.

* * *

 

     Leo had lost complete track of time, instead solely reliant on counting the loads he'd taken as a measure of progress. As the third cock in his jaw shot its load down his throat, he squeezed and clenched his ass tight to hold the four loads of semen currently deposited within. His body was covered in sweat from the surprising level of exertion of being a sex slave, dried cum and saliva caking his lower jaw from nursing cock so long. He panted for air as it removed itself from his mouth, taking the momentary breather to wipe his lips with his tongue and let his saliva glands coat his maw again, groaning as the fourth phallus slid neatly inside of him. His ass had been left unattended for what felt like ages now, with copious amounts of lube and semen slathered between his cheeks and filling him full. He struggled a bit in his bondage as the cock in his mouth withdrew slightly, feeling its flesh scrape against that damned tooth of his, a continuing source of frustration for his training.

     His thoughts of temporary solution were silenced by the slow and gradual entry of the fifth cock into his ass, this one easily twice as thick as anything he'd taken before. He moaned loudly against the member in his mouth as the cock continued to spear him wider and wider apart, moans turning to whimpers as his skin was stretched to its limit, muscles bulging in his arms and legs as he tried to squirm away. It was futile however, as the cock only kept pushing and pressing inside of him, its pace slowing as it met continued resistance, then pulling out slightly before reinserting with even more lubricant. He tried to clench his fists and ass tightly, to try and resist, however futile such gestures were in his predicament.

     The cock suddenly popped hard inside of him, completely filling him and pushing the existing loads of cum deeper inside of his anus, his body rigid as the tip of the cock pressed ever so firmly against the edge of his prostate. He felt it slowly pull back out of his ass in preparation for thrusting, a knot of sorts pulling free of his ring before pushing back in again, that tip once more pegging his prostate and making him whimper and moan in a mixture of pleasure and discomfort both. Soon the pace quickened, that knot popping in and out like a ball while the tip stroked and slammed inside of him, pre spurting from his own length with each tap. He remembered Master's words about not climaxing and struggled to fight his primal needs, though the battle was short lived as his own length finally shot its first load of the day down between his legs.

     He felt something snap in his mind as he ejaculated like that, the discomfort melting into the background as he hungered for more of that cock inside of him, nostrils flaring as he savagely gobbled the member presented to his maw and forced his teeth as wide apart as possible. This felt sublime, a richer feeling of pleasure than he'd ever had before, and all from being so thoroughly used like this! He wanted - no, he NEEDED more. He needed the cock in his jaw to shoot its load, he needed to be filled with cum from stronger men than himself.

     He began to twist and crane his head around the shaft between his gums, treating it to a renewed, earnest appetite for its treasure within. The phallus continued its thrusting with seeming increasing earnest, even as he felt it impact his troublesome molar on several more occasions. This treatment went on for ages, Leo milking the cocks of their seed, and neither quite willing to give in to his methods, bringing him to increasing frustration as a result. His own cock throbbed as the man to his rear impacted his prostate as if he were aiming for the bullseye of a target, though his rhythm was still too slow to climax, while the man to his front kept just on the edge.

     Time held no meaning to him like this, and yet when both cocks suddenly withdrew from his body without a word or indication otherwise, the time limit imposed at the start came rushing back into view. He could only lay there in silence, a lustful whimper fluttering into the air as he craved the return of those lengths into his body, desperate for more. He could smell Michelangelo's pheromones approach before stopping just in front of his face, a hand reaching under his chin to stroke gently there, his brother's erection pressing tenderly to his lips.

     The hand moved to the hood secured on his head and slowly began removing it from his body, the tight material loosening and peeling noisily away from his sweaty hide. The ensemble was fully removed and set aside, blinding light and the din of vent fans assaulting his newly-freed senses, that tender touch returning to his chin. "Are you alright?" Leonardo nodded, his aching jaw still agape. "You failed, slave. Three times. You know that, right?" Leo nodded again; his own orgasm, his failure to satisfy all five men at either end of his body...technically, he would've counted it as four failures, since he didn't get three guys off, but his brother was for more generous. "We'll discuss your punishment later. I'm going to let you cool down here for now, alright? Just relax, breathe, and sleep if you need be." Leonardo nodded a final time, the tension in his body melting away as Michelangelo's fingers massaged his temples, a meek churr emanating from his threat. He couldn't see Donatello motioning to Michelangelo from behind him, only whimpering a little as his brother's soft fingers left his skin, and the cool air of the infirmary soothed his body like a cold shower.

     Michelangelo slowly pulled the doorway closed behind him so that Leonardo was safely out of ear shot, Donatello holding up the tablet and security camera from Leo's room. "Where did he go?"

     Donatello looked genuinely fearful, his lips quivering slightly. "Karai's. He wants to renegotiate her terms."


	14. Negotiations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A lot more than Leo's sanity are on the line as Raphael meets with Karai.

     Karai sorted through the paperwork left on her desk for the day, carefully reviewing and signing them before filing the documents in her outbox. Reforming the clan into a legitimate business conglomerate hadn't been easy, especially with over a dozen Mutants running around New York City alone, courtesy of her late Father. Still, with the cooperation of several former ‘associates’, and the convenient timing of another conflict in the Middle East requiring the counter-espionage services of her ninja-clan-turned-PMC, it had gone about as smoothly as possible with only one hiccup remaining.

     "Miss Karai, a R. Hamato is here to see you. He says you know him." The reception intercom blared in her office, her migraine intensifying in response. The absolute last thing she needed this week was him coming to complain.

     "Send him in." The intercom clicked off and her doors opened, a heavily-dressed man with no outward discernible features clomping inside. Almost as soon as the doors closed, Raphael ditched the coat and hat, sweat formed on his brow. "You must be hot in all that. It's what, ninety outside today?"

     "Yeah, hot as hell. Can't wait to stop wearin' all dis shit just to go outside." Karai fingered a button on her desk, the door locking securely, blinds closing, and a white noise generator silencing their conversations from listening ears. Her office was now, for all intents and purposes, a fortress. "We need ta talk, Mizz K." Raphael took a seat while she waltzed to the bar, pouring a glass of water for them both. "About yer offer."

     "I thought we were all in agreement. Prove to us that your family won't be a threat anymore by cooperating with some requests from myself and my partners, and we'll give you full protection while helping Mutants go public with their existence." She sat a glass down in front of Raphael, nursing her own as she took a seat. "Your brothers have been endeavoring quite hard in acclimating to normal life, as have you. Just look at you, braving the daylight to come visit me, speaking with my staff instead of sneaking in...” She smiled sweetly, trying to reassure the terrapin that he was acclimating well.  “How is Leonardo-san doing?"

     "Dats why I'm here. Leo is...Leo. He's not gonna understand why we did dis, why we signed up with you. Neither is Master Splinter." Karai nodded between sips. They were the two who threatened to throw a wrench into the works, but part of the agreement - the lynchpin, as it were - was that if Leo would stand down, they would protect Splinter as well. "What we did was right, but how we're accomplishing it...I have my doubts."

     "I did everything Donatello asked of me. Everything you asked of me, Raphael. Judging from Donatello's reports, our new pharmaceutical hallucinogen works beautifully, and should work wonders with PTSD sufferers by forcing them to confront and forgive the source of their pain." She swallowed some more water, suddenly feeling parched. "With the right therapy and guidance, of course."

     "Yeah, about dat. They've been turning Leo into a..." Raphael paused, pained. “He’s always had dis stick up his ass, you know that, but they’re going a bit too far.” He stared down at the bottom of his glass, his visage staring back.  “They’re gonna break him, K.”

     "Let me ask you something, Raphael. Did he ever ask for it to stop?" Raphael stayed silent, eyes down. "Did he ever refuse?" He shook his head. "Despite his discomfort, and even displeasure, did he ever say No?" He shook harder. "Was he ever given ample, clear opportunity to revoke consent to anything?" Raphael broke the glass in his hands, fingers trembling with anger as glass pierced his skin and crimson trickled forth.

     " **OF COURSE HE WAS!** But dis ain't him, Karai. You know that, I know that. They're preying on his sense of honor and duty to manipulate him like a puppet." He calmed himself down as Karai measured him up, his bloodied fingers dipping into a pocket and pulling out a velvet bag, tossing it on her desk. "So I wanna go wit the second option you proposed."

     "Absolutely not!” Her eyes were wide, Raphael's gaze defeated and downtrodden. "Raphael, that is the absolute last resort. That is only if all else fails, and you know that."

     "I know, but if it saves Leo from dis, I'll do it in a heartbeat. I love 'im, K." She watched the tears well up in his eyes, flecks of blood dripping from his cut hands onto the carpet. "Dis ain't right. I ain't gonna lose my family over dis." His words were soft and painful, as if their mere utterance could destroy someone.

     She stared at him in shock and disbelief, slowly reaching for the bag and pulling it toward her. "I propose a third way, Raphael, if you'll let me." He lifted his head up toward her, that pitiful look on his face fracturing her heart. They had been worthy adversaries once, and still could be, if things went dire. Yet everyone wanted peace now, and were willing to sacrifice to attain it, including herself. They'd grown to be like a strange, weird family of sorts, relying on one another to make the city a better place for all, and if even one of them was suffering now, she had to help. "Go home. Say nothing. You will know what to do when the time is right, Raphael. I promise."

     "Dat's it? No specifics?" He frowned, scowling a bit at her.

     "Not here." She stepped around the desk and knelt in front of him, grabbing his bloodied hands gently between her own as she searched his eyes. "Tonight you will find out who your brother really is, Raphael. If you still wish to follow through with this, I will accept you one week from today, at our scheduled meeting. Is that acceptable?" He gave a gentle nod, her hands squeezing his own tighter. "I hope the answer you receive is the one you desire, Raphael. I truly do."

     The turtle solemnly stood and dressed himself back in the thick layer of clothes, seeing himself out of her office without another word exchanged between them. Once he had left, she snatched the phone receiver from her desk and fingered the phone number, tapping her foot impatiently as it rang. "Donatello? You and Michelangelo need to see me in my office tonight. There's one more test I need you to perform for me."

* * *

   It had been shortly after her spies confirmed Splinter had permanently left the lair for life upstate that she had been approached by Donatello. The turtle had ambushed her at a warehouse she was liquidating, lounging atop a box of weapons destined for distant shores.  “Hello, Donatello. Quite the surprise.” She remembered being a little more venomous back then, a little more spiteful of the work left behind by her Father, a direct result of these meddling mutants. She also remembered how uncharacteristically…jubilant the terrapin had been, a demeanor more reminiscent of Michelangelo than the gifted scientist before her.  His grin was decidedly cocky, his usual belt of gadgets and supplies as absent as his bo staff, though she knew neither were _too_ far away should their need arise.

     “Nice place you’ve got here. Spacious, remote, full of assault weapons…” She wanted to strike him right then and there, to tear his shell from his body and watch him bleed to death on her floor.  “All legal, too. I checked your logs. Someone is on the up-and-up after all.”  He lifted his legs back over his chest before catapulting himself off the box and onto the floor, his agility and form still as precise and perfect as ever.  A true loss of a good soldier, wasted on a mutant like him. “Got a moment?”

     “I don’t, sorry.” She spat at him, expecting him to shrug and leave, and more than a little surprised when he didn’t.  “Fine.  I may have some time, depending on what you wish to discuss.” She watched him smile at her, the hairs on her neck bristling with rage.

     “First off, don’t lie to me like that again, or I take my deal and walk.” The wiseass brat stretched his limber body out in front of her, his physique quite handsome if it weren’t for his mutant features.  “I’m tired of playing hide and seek with your troops. So are Michelangelo and Raphael.” She tapped her foot impatiently as he paced around the cold cement floor, keeping his distance from her while making his confidence known.  “We want to…come into the day, so to speak.”

     She raised an eyebrow.  “You want to be known? To come out of hiding?” Donatello nodded, forcing her to suppress a deep seated urge to howl in laughter.  “For someone so smart, you are quite foolish.” She watched his right hand dip into the lip of his shell, a flick of his wrist sending an object flying at her face with surgical precision. She caught it between her index and middle fingers just as neatly, the USB drive coming into full view.  “And this is what, a virus to infect our network with?”

     “Nah, I already did that. It was how I knew where these guns were going, that your schedule was free right now, and that you’re missing their recital tonight.” Her eyes bulged from their sockets, rage seizing her every neuron.  “Don’t worry. I’ve kept that secret for years, I just needed to make sure you knew where we both stood, is all.” Her rage was searing hot, though his words were oddly…soothing, in their logic. If he was telling the truth, then nobody outside of this room knew about her family, and that alone was reason to hear him out.

     “Go on.”

     “It’s a show of trust on my part. A complete medical history for myself, including DNA results, allergens, disease resistances and vulnerabilities, toxins, the works.” He flashed a toothy smile at her as she twirled the drive between her fingers, considering the possibilities of such data.  “There’s enough data on that drive to have me killed without anyone being the wiser of the method. Hell, Russia would be dripping wet with envy to have such data for one of their targets.”

     “Then why give it to me?” She strode forward, heels clicking loudly on the concrete as she waltzed right up to his chest, closing the several foot gap between them down to an inch or two.  “We were once enemies, after all. Even now, we could only barely be considered…mutually neutral towards one another. You do not antagonize us, we do not antagonize you. Our shared patrols have been quite beneficial, but what you’re giving me tilts the tables quite far in our favor, Donatello.” The turtle didn’t flinch or move from his spot, his aura still calm.

     “Oh Karai, why do you assume I give it to you, hmm?” His grin widened, making her a bit uneasy.  “A trusted friend of mine in your newly-launched pharmaceutical division has the decryption key to its contents, after all. To you, it’s quite useless in its present state, and if I don’t return home tonight, the researcher in question won’t ever receive the key.” She couldn’t help but smirk. It was this sort of devious strategy that had led to their victory over her Father, and she couldn’t help but admire it, warrior to warrior.  She tucked the drive down between her breasts into a pocket hidden in her top, patting Donatello’s face with the same hand.

     “You always were a very gifted strategist, Donatello. Well then, assuming the contents are as advertised…what do you desire from me?” The turtle let his guard down, sitting back on the crate of weapons and crossing his legs, leaning back on his palms. He was openly exposed with no easy method of defense in such a position, a fact not lost on her for a moment. He really was trying to build trust and rapport with her, something he’d only do if he was going to ask for something quite monumental.

     “Like I said, we want to join society. I’ve been watching you for a while now and, well…you’re doing well. Like, actually good stuff. I mean, the military contractor stuff I don’t like, but your charity work, research divisions, technology companies…” He stopped himself from gushing too much, sighing outwardly.  “I’m tired of sitting in the dark, Karai, contributing anonymously, never taken seriously. I want to, well, work for you.”

     She blinked. “Excuse me?”

     “I want to work for you,” Donatello repeated, “contribute toward some research projects, share my knowledge. That researcher I mentioned? I’d specifically like to work with their team.” She wobbled a bit in her heels, more than a little floored by the admission. “I want to come into the light of day, Karai. We all do.”

     “All? Even Leonardo-san?” Her excitement at finally unifying their families and putting this constant fighting to rest was palpable, even as Donatello’s smile turned into a thin line of disharmony.  “I see.” She pivoted and walked away from the turtle, knowing it was too good to be true.  “It’s all or nothing, Donatello. We may not be allies, but we still have honor. I will not conspire in tearing apart a family just for your benefit.”

     “That’s not what I’m asking.”

     “You made it clear what you’re asking, and I will not-“

     Donatello’s hand fell on her shoulder, her instinct to break his fingers and throw him into the nearest box of grenades racing along her nerves like a wildfire. “That’s why I said I want to make a deal.” His hand retreated as soon as he finished speaking those words, his life spared by her mixture of pity for his predicament, and her genuine interest in what he had to say. “To come into society proper, to come out for who we are…we’ll need protection, safety, support. Right now, we do all this ourselves, with Leo leading the charge. If we can prove to him that you and your allies will provide this for us, back us up when we need it the most, shield us from everyone who will want to rip us apart and see what made us tick, to integrate us into society at large…I know he’ll come around, Karai.”

     She stood in silent thought for a moment or two, Donatello’s words hanging in the air. Yet again, he had thought of everything, and he wasn’t wrong. If Leonardo-san could be shown he wasn’t needed as a leader anymore, that he didn’t need to protect his family, then yes, he would almost certainly stand down. Even so, that left _her_ holding the proverbial bag.

     “I have no problem agreeing to your deal, Donatello, but surely you know that others will not be so…forthcoming with their compliance.” She pivoted again on her heels, staring him down with a determined expression of battle. “Leonardo must not merely stand down, he must agree to never intervene again. Others must be assured of his…pacification.” Donatello’s expression grew grimmer, though she needed to make sure he would be as committed as she was to such a contract. “If you can provably demonstrate his pacification, then you’ll have everything needed for integration and independence, including the protection of your Father and relatives, mutant or otherwise.” He nodded, the gears turning inside that brilliant mind of his at potential solutions.  “I may also call on you for favors, though they will be strictly limited to the four of you. You have my word I will not treat you as my private army or as expendable assets, and I will respect any reasonable rejections you may offer me.”

     “So…we have a deal?” His hand extended toward her slowly, carefully, finally in peace. She gripped it tightly with her own, squeezing his olive hide with firm determination.

     “We do, Donatello.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As they say, the road to hell is paved with good intentions, and it appears those are quite in abundance here. After all, who doesn't want to live a normal life? Or protect those they love?
> 
> Anyway, this chapter is split into present (Raph/Karai) and past (Karai/Don) exposition, which may confuse some folks, hence these notes here. I welcome critique on how to better explain time skips/jumps like these in my writing without resorting to these notes, so please leave it in the comments if you have some!


End file.
